Autumn Fell
by kadieliz
Summary: Clara knew that Merle was gone. She she had doubt that she would ever see him again. That is until one frosty Autumn morning.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note - Of course I own nothing. Only my words. A little bit on how my minds changes the story a bit. Merle is still with the group, yet somehow manages to lose his hand. But more on that as the story continues. I try to be as lighthearted as I can here. I have such a liking for Michael Rooker and the character that is Merle. I wish they made him a good guy and I do have my TWD theorys. Anyways before I bore you. Have fun reading and please leave me some reviews. This is a short one.

The afternoon was cool and the smell of dead leaves filled the air. The sickeningly sweet smell of candy was absent in the soft breeze as was the sounds of excited laughter associated with Halloween. There were to be no costumes this year that she knew of. That is of course if the whole world was playing a huge Halloween prank on her. She laughed into her mug of instant coffee.

"I really think I would kill everyone."

Turning around from the window see was staring out of, she placed her mug of coffee on the end table and turned to the feline that was stretched along the top of her gray couch with a paw covering his tightly closed eyes. She smiled and stroked from the top of his head to the tip of his tail.

"I envy your cool, Carlin. I really do," she whispered and took back the hot, steaming mug and sat with him in the proper place. She closed her eyes and made herself get lost in her thoughts.

***_His arms wrapped around her waist, taking her by surprise as she chopped walnuts for the brownies she was making for the trick or treaters. Sighing with a laugh, she continued on the one pile of nuts before turning around so they were face to face. Her hair was pixie short and blonde. Her body let him have a bit to grab and with curves to drool over. Her green eyes cut through his as her plump lips begged to be kissed. His hands tightened at her hips as he looked down and admired the dress she had on. He loved her in purple._

_"Hey love," she said as she pecked her lips for him. He kissed her lightly, taking in her scent. Today her scent matched the season. Apples and cinnamon. " Are you alright?"_

_"Yeah. I'm fine. Jus' a long day."_

_"Can I get you something?" she asked. She watched his smile go wide and laugh quietly, biting his lip. She blushed and smothered a laugh herself, turning back to her original task. He pressed himself closer behind her. She heard him groan as his fingers tightened around her hips again, this time making her dress inch up, revealing her smooth thighs._

_"Baby, I need to finish this," she smiled as his groan went louder. She felt fireworks go off in her lower belly. "Sweetie, the kids down at Eureka St. look forward to my brownies," she stated matter of factly. She felt his lips and hot breath on her neck work their way up to the back of her ear. Her legs felt like jelly._

_"I'm lookin' forward to your brownies too," he said grinding into the back of her. It took all she had to fight it._

_"Keep it up and I won't let you have any," she said quickly. She felt him stop and take a defeated step back. She smiled triumphantly. She turned and kissed him deeply, running her fingers through his short, curly blonde hair. "I am going to have so much fun with you later," she said seductivly. Smiling, he grabbed a brownie off the plate and took a bite._

_"I'm gonna have so much fun lettin' ya," he kissed her again. She tasted the chocolate on his lips and suckled the flavor off. "Come on girl. Git these treats wrapped. We'll get our costumes on at your sister's. We're gonna be late._"***

She was brought out of her daydream by a loud meow. She turned and saw Carlin dip his head upside down. She laughed at the limber cat. Her right hand went over to the other. Stroking and twisting the ring that wrapped around her ring finger. She felt a hot tear slide down her cheek. Taking it off, she kissed it.

"Happy Halloween," she whispered. She smiled as she looked on the inside of the gold band before slipping it back on her finger.

Engraved was Clara and Merle.


	2. Chapter 2

*** I apologize about the long update. I got slammed with work almost every night. When I wasn't working, I was sleeping. What an exciting life I lead. I am aiming to have a chapter at least every Thursday. At least! As always, reviews are a huge inspiration and a kick of motivation.

-Kadie***

Clara woke with a start and a thumping heart. She looked around the dimly lit living room and remembered where she was. She felt a chill in the air and sat up from the couch that she had dozed off on. She had been asleep for a few hours. Not that she minded, in these days, she figured, sleep was the best hobby one could have. She was sure nobody was as lucky as she was though. She thanked God for her dreams. Nightmares were few and far in between. The horrors of the new world plagued her mind daily which is why she cherished her sleep. A static white noise spooked her from her thought. She scratched Carlin behind his ears and sat up, smiling when she heard a familiar voice coming from the source.

"Clara?," said the smooth, velvety voice of a lady coming from a walkie talkie. "Clara? Wake up. If you became a walker, please, for the love of God start walking in the opposite direction of this street. I'll leave you a cow and a few chickens, but thats it. Love you sister." Clara swiped the walkie talkie from the edge of the counter and laughed into it.

"I'm so glad that all you would sacrifice Cloyde the cow and a few measly chickens for my zombified self. It means a lot, Daisy. Thanks."

"Anything for you. Martin is making another run into Laurenceville tomorrow morning. Give me your list."

"Who is going with him?" she asked, reaching into the cupboard for a mug for her tea.

"Now you know damn well he don't want no extra baggage. Mart made it perfectly clear that he travels alone. He insists it's better that way for the rest of us. Besides, the last few times he was there, it was clear."

"Yeah. That we know of. I just don't feel comfortable with him going solo. Everyone else has a partner. I will go with him. I can shoot," Clara defiantly said as she boiled some water in her electric kettle. She quickly thought about using canned fuel, but she wanted her tea quicker than that.

"Bullshit. You can throw. Baby, I know you can throw, but shoot?" Daisy couldn't suppress her giggle. Clara didn't find this funny at all. "That Dixon surely taught you quite a few things about throwing a knife. It's almost magical. But I've seen you shoot. You aren't ready to go out there with a gun. Trust. He has plenty of backup."

"Well thanks for making me feel completely useless."

"Honey, I meant nothing by it. I just want everyone in one piece and human," she said with a heartfelt tone. Clara felt herself bite her lip.

"I know."

"I'll ask Martin about teaching you something or two about shooting. In the meantime, let him do what he does best. It would make him happy to just know everyone is safe and sound while he does this," Daisy said with no nonsense. When she heard the kettle whistle, she sighed.

"Fine then. Let me get my list of stuff. I definitely need more batteries for the walkie. I suggest you both stock up as well as well as everyone else on the road," she said as she took a seat with her tea and the pad and pencil at the table.

"Are you really using some power for tea?"

"Shawn uses it to charge his iPod," she said with defense.

"Point taken." The static from the walkies went in and out and Clara shook hers a bit. "How are you on 'lady things'?, as Martin calls them."

"I'm good on that," she hastily said, shaking her head at her sister's random ways. "Okay ready?" she asked, holding the pad up.

"Ready."

The list was short and sweet to Daisy's relief. The quicker the trip inside meant the safer her husband was. She laughed at her sister's wants and needs. Green and chai tea, honey, lip balm, a few books, canned tuna and chicken, some canned fruit and vegetables, and matches. She could die tomorrow and she would die happy if she had a cup of tea with her, she thought. Daisy envied that about her sister, but sometimes, like tonight, she could tell what was on her mind. She could tell she wished for just a bit more, but what were wishes now?

"Clarabelle?" asked Daisy

"Shit," was her reply.

"What?"

"Every time you call me that we are going to have a heart to heart. I've never been good at those."

"I just wanted to know if you were alright. I mean, nobody is alright, but you know what I mean." Clara sighed. It took her a few moments to answer and she knew what Daisy was getting at,

"I just hope he's okay. I pray for it. I dream it. I would die a happy woman just to know he was safe," she choked out with a lump in her throat.

"He and Daryl always went about saying that nothing could kill a Dixon but a Dixon. Why not believe that?"

"I would need to see it to believe it," she answered quietly. Clara looked at the clock and smiled. It was bedtime. "I'll come over in the morning before Martin takes off. I'm going to head to bed. Kiss Shawn for me."

"I will. Be careful when you come over?"

"Never. Being careful isn't very exciting."

"Of course it isn't. I love you, Clara," Daisy said softly. A small smile crept across her lips.

"I love you more."

She turned the walkie off to conserve power and yawned. Carlin leaped up onto her lap and nestled himself along her stomach. She pet him and scratched his nose and he purred. Simple things reminded her that things will be alright again one day. Sipping the last of her tea, she stood with Carlin and made her way upstairs, blowing candles out along the way. She listened to the creaking stairs as she made her way up. She would listen for their creaks on nights when Merle worked late. Simple things. Silly things.

Carlin leaped from her arms and to the bed, finding his usual spot at the foot. She slipped from her jeans and removed her tank top and cardigan and slipped into a pair of pajama pants and an older tee shirt that hugged her body. She got into bed and snuggled down, trying to warm up. The nights had been quite cooler lately. Cooler than usual. Closing her eyes, she thought back to a random night she spent with Merle at her job. She remembered watching his eyes lock on to her as she played her piano. She smiled and her body immediately became warmer. She felt tears welling up, but she fell asleep to quickly to wipe them.


	3. Chapter 3

Well that turned out quicker than I had thought. Thank you all for your motivation! I am loving the reviews! Now on with the story!

-Kadie

_The voices in the bar were loud to say the least. Clara was running up and down the line, serving as quickly as she could before the clock struck nine. She regretted wearing her wedges that night as she stomped down on the hard floor in haste to get the next drinker a drink. She let out a small cry, but held her own. She stood for a moment to regain feeling in her foot when she heard his voice._

_"Maybe if she wore some regular shoes that wouldn' a happened jus' now," Merle said to Daryl as they both took their chairs. Daryl nodded and raised two fingers to Martin. The larger black man shook his head at Clara as he retrieved two beers for the men. She stared at all three of them in disbelief._

_"Redneck has a point," said Martin. She heard beer come out of Daryl's nose with a stifled laugh. She was waiting for Merle's retort and she looked over to him only to see his eyes locked on hers. He blushed and quickly snapped out of it and an annoyed look crossed his face._

_"I thought we 'greed ta not say 'hurtful things to one 'nother', Marty," reminded Merle. Martin shrugged and laughed._

_"We're we drunk?"_

_"Mos' likely," he responded with a gulp of his beer. He licked his lips and his eyes went back to Clara. "Hi Clara," he said formally and a little too quietly. Clara sighed and gave him a light smile while wiping her hands on a rag._

_"Hi Merle," she said softly. She looked over at Daryl, who was chugging his brew. "Hey Crossbow." He waved._

_"So," he staggered. "Ya singing' tonight?" _

_"I am. Any requests?" she asked as she gave the bar a final wipe down._

_"Naw. Just, uh, jus' somethin' that'll ease my mind."_

_"Hard day?" she asked, reaching under the bar for another beer for Daryl. _

_"Somethin' like that," he said almost in a whisper. Strange crossed her mind as to how he was acting. He had this hopeless tone in his voice that was very unlike him. Even Daryl was looking at him with a raised brow. She took a deep breath gave him a good long look and watched Merle's face turn bright red. He shifted in his seat and looked at Daryl, who quickly got up and made his way for the pool table, leaving he and Clara to themselves. _

_"Are you okay? You look flustered."_

_"Awe no. I'm a'right."_

_"Wanna talk about it?" she asked softly. The sweetness in her voice made his legs like jelly and set off a firework within him. He shook his head and chuckled a bit._

_"I said I'm okay."_

_"Merle," she said as she gently placed her hands around his. He swore his heart stopped. "I've known you long enough to know when you're lying," she concluded. She saw his face soften and and a small smile form on the corner of his lips. He gently squeezed her hands back and the moment seemed to have stopped for the both of them. He took a breath._

_"I'm fine really. I'll a, I'll uh, I'll tell ya later," he said with a promise in voice. She nodded with curious eyes. He knew she didn't believe him, but he promised himself that he would ask her tonight. He couldn't wait much longer or he would give up. Hell, Daryl couldn't wait much longer for him to ask her either. His thought was interrupted by her when she patted his hand and coughed. "Go on. Go an' sing somethin'."_

_"Suppose I should. I'll see you later then. Wish me luck," she asked with a smile. He felt his heart stop again._

_"Ya dont need that."_

_She laughed and gave Daryl, who made his way back to his seat, a nod before skittering about to her lone piano in the corner of the room. Daryl nudged Merle with his elbow and all Merle could do was put his head in his hands. Daryl laughed._

_"Ya're the toughest sonvabitch I know. Ya kicked a man's ass for looking' at ya all funny and here ya are getting' all soft for Clara. Did ya ask her yet?" he asked with hope. Merle only removed his hands and glared at Daryl. It was all the answer he needed. They both perked up with they heard Clara from the corner._

_"Doing requests tonight, ladies and gentleman! Any requests?" she shouted. She giggled as everyone quieted down in thought. After awhile, she scoped her crowd and picked on an old man to pick her a song. "How about it, Mr. Flanders? Anything from your time?" The old man blushed and thought. Licking his lips, he spoke with a scraggly voice._

_"I like Hank Williams."_

_"Me too. Anything in mind?" she asked as she let her fingers dance on the keys._

_"Oh, anything you know would be nice." _

_With that she gave the room her smile and continued to play her piano and get a little bit more comfortable. She looked over to Merle and his lips formed a smile with anticipation. Daryl was intrigued. Not as intrigued as Merle, but interested nonetheless. After looking at him for a moment, she felt her confidence boost and she began on Mr. Flanders' request. A familiar tune filled the room and everyone cheered. Merle laughed and Daryl sat more comfortably. Even Martin stopped serving and pulled Daisy behind the bar and started dancing with her. Merle sat forward when he heard her voice._

_"Hey, hey, good lookin'._

_Whatcha got cookin'? _

_How's about cookin' somethin' up with me?_

_Hey, sweet baby,_

_Don't you think maybe?_

_We could find us a brand new recipe?" _

_She took a pause and continued to dance her fingers on the keys. She looked at everyone and nodded with a grin._

_"I got a hot-rod Ford and a two-dollar bill._

_And I know a spot right over the hill. _

_There's soda pop and the dancin's free,_

_so if you wanna have fun come along with me. _

_Hey, good lookin'._

_Whatcha got cookin'? _

_How's about cookin' somethin' up with me?_

_I'm free and ready, _

_So we can go steady. _

_How's about savin' all your time for me?_

_No more lookin', _

_I know I've been tookin'_

_How's about keepin' steady company?"_

_Another small break from the words was what she needed. She giggled with her people and played her piano. She made it a point to lock her eyes with Merle for this next bit. She didn't know why. Something in her gut just told her to. She felt butterflies as she tapped the keys. He sat up more alert and Daryl could only smile for him. Clara pointed right at him with her act and felt the music. _

_"I'm gonna throw my date-book over the fence._

_And find me one for five or ten cents. _

_I'll keep it 'til it's covered with age_

_'cause I'm writin' your name down on every page. _

_Hey, good lookin', _

_Whatcha got cookin'? _

_How's about cookin' somethin' up with me?"_

_She diddled with her keys for a minute more before coming to an end. Everyone roared with laughter. Some with drunkenness. Some with glee. Some with happy memories. Couples danced even when the music stopped. Daryl and Merle clapped until their hands were red. Clara blushed and stood, took a bow, and walked back behind the bar. Martin slapped her back with a smile. She saw the brothers and went to them. She made a wide grin at Merle, who laughed and turned to Daryl._

_"Go away for a minute."_

_"What?" asked a very confused Daryl as Merle gave him a look. Daryl instantly got it and made his way to the pool table yet again. There he was with her again. He froze. He kicked himself for not thinking about what he was about to say. He only stared at her, into her eyes. He felts his palms sweat along with his forehead. He ran a hand through his very short blonde curls and licked his lips. He took a deep breath and took her hand and started walking her to the end of the bar. She stared at him in confusion and waited. He grunted and made their way to the backdoor and he nearly punched the door down. The cool air calmed him down an he took yet another deep breath._

_"Merle?" she asked, almost starting to get worried for his behavior. Almost. She has seen him do weirder things._

_"I know 'm not much of nothin'. I don't have nothin' fancy and I know I'm nothin' in this world," he started, sounding like a deflating balloon. Her heart started to break with his words. How could he think so little of himself? "I know me 'n my family have bit of a reputation and I know how this sound all sorts a crazy. I sound like a loon," he said with laughter. She stared at him with sad eyes. "You're th' reason why I ever showed up in school. You're why I try to stay outta trouble. When I went to juvie for that time, it killed me to be away from Daryl...and you. I sound like a madman," he ran his fingers throu s hair again and started to pace, she stepped back and just observed him. His breathing got short and fast. _

_"Hey hey hey. Merle. Calm down. Hey," she said as she grabbed at his thick torso, pulling at his tight black tee shirt. Her hands went to his face and she pulled his head down to hers and they rested their foreheads against each others. It calmed him like a baby. She smiled at him, ignoring the awkwardness of their being so close. "What's going on here?" she whispered. He sighed, loving the surreal feeling of her thick body being so close to him, smelling her sweet scent, being touched by her soft fingers._

_What she did next surprised her herself. She ran her fingers through his curls and pulled him down closer. She closed her eyes and gently brushed her lips on his. He tensed then relaxed. He loved her right then and there, but she wouldn't find that out until later on in life. He found his hands resting on her hips and pulled her in closer, she giggled and deepened their embrace which lasted a quite a time. The soft mews escaping her throat we're trophies for him. He brought up on hand and ran his fingers through her short cropped hair and he happily grunted when she nipped at his bottom lip. Her hands rested at his chest and she quickly realized that after all the years she had known him, that was her favorite part of his body. Funny, she thought._

_Then they heard the door open with a couple of feet shuffling along. They heard in unison Daryl and Daisy._

_"There you guys are."_

_Merle and Clara looked at them with their faces still close together. Not another word was spoken from Daryl or Daisy. The dark skinned woman smiled and looked at a shocked Daryl. Giggling, she tugged at his shirt to leave and he followed, closing the door. Merle and Clara stood in silence and took a step back and took each other in. Breathing steadily now, he went to say something, but was caught offguard by her lips on his again. He laughed heartily. She giggled uncontrollably and he wrapped his arms around her thick and petite frame._

_He always counted that as their first date._

She woke to the muffled sounds of shouting from the distance. She felt her heart break as she reached for the other side of the bed. She knew it was empty, but she could never break the habit.

A lump formed in her chest as she raced to the window. She opened it to get a better look, but it was still far too dark out. She could barely make out what was being said. It was only noise that she heard. She took a look at the clock. It read five-fifteen in the morning. Something wasn't sitting right. She quickly slipped out of her pajama bottoms and into a pair of skinnies and slid into her boots. She made haste and flew down the stairs, stumbling at the last step. She caught herself and ran to the kitchen. There was just enough moonlight to see the walkie talkie on the edge of the table where she left it. She nearly knocked it off the table. It bounced in her hands and she steadied herself. The static noise that it made when she turned it on was like thunderclaps in the quiet house. She took a breath.

"Daisy! Martin! What's going on?! What's that commotion outside?" she waited for what seemed like eternity. When there was no answer, worry and fear flooded her veins. "Daisy! Answer me!"

"Clara," answered Daisy. She sounded like she had been crying. Clara swallowed hard. "You need to get down here. Be safe and fast."

Clara clamped the walkie to her jeans, grabbed her belt of knives and threw it around her arm like a purse, and ran out the door like a bat out of hell. She jumped onto her bike, kicked up the kickstand, and was off.


	4. Chapter 4

I would like to apologize for the few words that I typed a bit wonky. I'm writing on an iPad and sometimes it needs to catch up with me. I also should have proof read this better. It won't happen again. A reader asked me a question in a review regarding Clara's age. I should clarify that they are both in their thirties. I'm playing with Merle's age here a bit. They've known each other for some time. They got together while in their mid-twenties. I apologize for any confusion. And yes. Daisy is black. And yes. Clara and Daisy are sisters. That comes into play later on with a very confused T-Dog. As you could tell, I eased up on the whole racism thing. Racism does not sit well with me. As does killing kids, so you will probably not be shocked to see Sophia in here as well. I personally have a hard time when I write about it. Not to say that the show is wrong. I love it and power to the writers for having that kind of stomach for it. Its a wonderful show...clearly. Anyway. I won't give to much away. Like I said, it will all fall into place. Now on to Chapter 4! Like always, I appreciate the reviews!

-Kadie

Merle grunted and growled as he and the rest of the group trekked through the woods in search of some type of shelter, leaving the van without a guard. He was livid. First their camp was raided by one measly walker. Lori insisted that they leave immediately. Of course Rick listened and piled everyone into the van. Then Daryl. Why Daryl had gone and opened his mouth like that? He didn't know. He shook his head in anger toward his brother. He blocked out Daryl and Rick's words as they tried to talk to him. The final straw was when Rick went and grabbed Merle's arm. Without hesitation, Merle turned around a took a swing at Rick, knocking the wind out of him. Everyone was in an uproar.

"Ya'll best shut the hell up!" Merle shouted in the moonlight. "We are turnin' 'round right now! There is nowhere safe anymore. We just gotta make the best whereva' we go on to."

"Look," panted Rick, who was still cradling his ribs. "I know we can't stand each other. I know we never see eye to eye. But you have come a long way from that bastard you used to be and the son of a bitch you are now. You saved our asses many times. I hate to admit this, but I trust you. I trust Daryl. Why are you so against this? What are you hiding" he asked in frustration. Everyone was silent as they waited for Merle's answer. He locked eyes with Daryl and sighed.

"We ain't gonna put it in any danger. Lord knows how many more were over there. We could be bein' followed. We ain't goin'. End 'f story." he said calmly. Nobody had ever heard Merle sound so sincere before. They were somewhat shocked and intrigued. Rick nodded and started everyone in the opposit direction, respecting Merle's order. Daryl snorted and walked up to his brother.

"Ya scared?" he asked. Merle went wide eyed. The group stopped in their tracks to listen.

"The hell ya talkin' to like that kid?" Merle stood tall and ready for the argument that was about to take place. Daryl stood up to him, still looking up to him, but squared off. "I ain't scared."

"Yer' scared. You know it's safe there. I know it's safe there. Can't you see we're all tired of movin' 'long whenever one of those things come our way? Nothin' would climb that high up in th' area. No one would be stupid enough to come down it either," he said. Merle felt an urge to take a punch at him. For saying too much. But he was right. He knew it was a very safe place to be. It's why he and Clara picked it out. It was secluded and beautiful. The lump in his throat was hard to swallow and Daryl saw that he got through to Merle.

"I can't go back, Daryl," he whispered so only his brother could hear. "I left her. I left her alone and sad. I left her when she needed me. I can't go. I don't deserve to. And if she ain't there," he stopped and quickly looked away. Everyone was startled by his peculiar behavior. They weren't used to this Merle. He coughed to regain whatever dignity he showed. Rick walked back to the brothers. Hands on hips and sleep in his eyes.

"Guys? What's going on?" he asked softly. Daryl let out a sigh and adjusted his crossbow on his back. Merle shifted and scratched his arm.

"Daryl 'ere is gonna take ye all ten miles up this road. Ya need to make a left th' pumpkin patch. Ya can't miss it. Follow up that road and you'll see a few houses on a long and lonely street. It's the last one. Daryl knows the way," Merle said defeatedly. Daryl crinkled his brows together and the group felt uneasy, like they were walking on eggshells. Taking his bag in his good hand, his only hand, clapped his brother on the back and started in the other direction, making eye contact with the group and walking slowly past them. Not a word was spoken.

"Merle! What the hell?" shouted Daryl, who started stomping to him. "Where ya goin'?"

"I told ya I can't go back there. I want ya to take them there. You're right. It's safe."

"You know I ain't leavin' ya behind, you prick. If we go then ya comin' with us or we don't go at all."

"Since when in the hell did ya become Chief? As I recall, I thought the badge over there was callin' th' shots."

"I'm you're brother. Cut this shit out," Daryl demanded. It took Merle back a bit. Daryl hardly ever stood up to his brother unless it was serious and necessary. "Grow a pair and man up! You owe that to Clara!"

Daryl readied himself for Merle's punch. He swore Merle's bones got harder when he was angry. They wrestled each other to the ground and took shots at each others face and chest. Wherever they could get a good one it, they would. There was blood everywhere by what the moonlight showed everyone. Carol was crying for Daryl to stop. Andrea and Rick tried to jump in and stop. Glenn, Maggie, Beth and Herschel stood back while the Carl and Sophia watched on with Lori holding the both of them. By the time they threw the last of their punches, it had been nearly a fifteen minute fight. The both of them laid on the ground, bloodied and bruised. They stared off into the stars for awhile to come to their senses. It was something they had learned to do as kids after a fight. It calmed the both of them.

They looked up and around and saw that everyone was staring at them. Daryl looked over to Merle and whispered.

"Ya've been clean for awhile now. She won't turn you away."

"I don't deserve it," said Merle as he cleared his throat. Daryl nodded.

"That's true. But when she sees that it's you and not that man you became, I'm pretty sure she will hear ya out."

"I don' know if I'll ever be able to forgive m'self if she ain't there."

"Nothin' can kill a Dixon but a Dixon," said Daryl so only Merle can hear. A small smile spread across their faces. A smile that nobody in the group ever saw on either men. Merle struggled to his feet and hunched back down and extended his hand to his brother, who graciously accepted it. They brushed each other off of dirt and leaves and they examined each others wounds the best they could. Rick came over and shook his head at them, running his fingers through his growing hair.

"Well now that that's off your chests, do we have a plan of sorts?" he directed toward Daryl, who then looked at Merle. The older brother sighed and picked up his bag.

"Yeah. We got a plan. C'mon back t' the van."

Merle lead the way. Followed by Rick and the rest of the group. Daryl followed behind last with Carol at his side. He walked with one arm around her waist and his eyes peeled.

"Who is Clara?" she asked softly. She heard Daryl chuckle.

"Merle's wife," he said with a loud bluntness so everyone could hear, and everyone did. They all stopped in their tracks. He then realized just how loud he spoke and his blood ran cold. He kicked himself.

"Merle's what?!" all the ladies said. Merle turned around and glared at Daryl.

"Shit," winced Daryl.

"Did I not jus' kick ya ass hard enough, boy? Good Lord," escaped Merle's tired lips and continued on while everyone looked on in disbelief.

The drive to the road was quiet and tense. Merle felt every familiar bump on the ground and found himself getting more and more nervous. He never prayed as of late, but he prayed the entire drive there. He prayed for her safety. For her to be okay. For Daisy, Martin and Shawn to be okay. The only time he ever prayed this hard was when Clara lay in the hospital. It didn't work out to well then. That's why he hardly had a relationship with God, but he found himself needing to ask a higher power. Anyone who was up there, he begged silently. He couldn't help but smile through his fear on the inside just a little when he heard Daryl talk to Sophia.

"I want you to pick me and ya mama up the biggest pum'kin in the mornin'. I can make the coolest jack 'o' lantern," he said quietly so only she could hear. Merle knew he had gone soft on these people when he went looking for the little girl with Daryl. He knew what most of them thought of him, but when Rick said that he trusted him, it made him feel accomplished. Not many people ever trusted Merle Dixon. A selected few. That was all. He watched his brother's and Carol's relationship bloom when they brought Sophia back to her. He was happy that he finally found someone who got him. Even if it was in this scary and strange new world.

The bumps in the road increased as did Merle's heartbeat. His brother kept looking over to him every few minutes, checking on his features. He was sweaty in the cool, frosty, autumn air. His hands shook and he kept clearing his dry throat. He gasped as they made that left at the pumpkin patch. He saw Sophia and Carl squeeze their heads together so they can try to get a good look at them in the dark. Daryl watched him run his hand all over his face and through his hair.

"Slow down," said Daryl to Rick, who was driving. "Pull over right here. Be very quiet you guys," he said to the group. Merle got out first. The cold air dried the sweat on his forehead. Daryl jumped out behind him. Rick came from the other side. The three men looked at each other and then to the large house.

"Who lived here?" asked Rick.

"Dais' and Marty," answered Merle.

"And Shawn," added Daryl. "Whats'he twelve now?"

"Just about."

They took a few steps closer to the yard and they heard a noise that made them stop in their tracks. It was coming from inside the house and it sounded like hushed noises. Daryl readied his crossbow for the worst and said a silent prayer. Merle stood with his knife in hand and Rick with his hand on his gun, prepared to draw. They held their breaths as they saw the front door open and a long extended arm fly out holding a gun.

"What do you want?" asked the man who stood in the shadows of the door.

"We need to know who lives 'ere," said Daryl. There was a long silence. "Our friends lived here." The silence was broken by a familiar voice coming from the door that wasn't the man's. Her voice warmed Merle and Daryl in an instant. A relief washed over the brothers who sighed and looked at each other with hope in their eyes.

"Oh my God," said the woman. "It can't be," she exclaimed as she exited the house with the man. They could tell it was Daisy and she could tell it was them too. "Martin! It's them!"

She ran from the porch and opened the gate. Within moments, she stood in front of the brothers and Rick. Without thinking, she jumped into Daryl's arms and hugged him tight. Tears and smiles filled the air. Daisy couldn't speak. She cried into Daryl and looked up at Merle. She went to him then and wrapped her arms around him, squeezing him. The group felt safe enough and started to leave the van, beginning with Andrea. Martin brought Daryl in for a hug and slapped his back. He then looked at Merle and smiled

"Im'ma hug you now and kick your ass later," he said as he hugged him. Merle hugged him back with a grin. Everybody stood in awe as Merle, who as of right now was known as a racist, hugged a black man and embrace a black woman.T-Dog couldn't help but laugh in confusion. Rick cleared his throat and gave the couple a nervous smile.

"Who are your friends?" asked Daisy as she smiled wholeheartedly at them.

"Well, they're our friends," answered Daryl. "Where's Shawn?" he asked then held his breath.

"He still sleeps like a baby," Martin said. "We're all alright."

Daisy went to Merle and took his hands, quickly dropping them when she saw he was missing one. Her face went to horror and curiosity.

"What happened?!"

"Lon' story," he said. Worry flooded his face and she knew what he was thinking. She went to Martin.

"He said we are all alright, Merle."

"She, shes okay?" he asked as the lump in his throat made its way back. Daisy and Martin nodded and smiled.

"She's home," she said softly, squeezing his hand and his stump. "Lord Almighty. This is so sudden. Please," she said turning to Rick. "I'm Daisy and this is my husband Martin." Rick stood tall and shook both of their hands. Introductions were made quickly and the couple soon realized that there was no danger. Daisy went right to Lori and tended to her growing belly. A comfortable commotion had started and everyone, even a timid Michonne, felt immediately welcome. All quieted down when they heard a static noise of the walkie talkie that was clipped to Martin's belt.

"Daisy! Martin! What's going on?!"

The voice made Merle's legs turn to jello and he felt himself shake with nervousness. Daryl smiled.

"What's that commotion outside? Daisy! Answer me!" cried Clara from the walkie. Everyone listened to what was going to be said next. That and everyone realized that this woman was Merle's wife. Daisy grabbed the walkie from Martin's belt and tried to remain as calm as she could.

"Clara," she said. "You need to get down here. Be safe and fast."

Not another word was spoken. They could only hear Merle's short breaths.

From a distance, they all heard what sounded like a screen door slam back into it's frame along with faint stomps and grinding gravel.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N This is a shorter one, but here is their reunion. I know you've been waiting. A warm shout out to Jaded79, MarionArnold, Day-Of-The-Dead-TattooGal, and "Guest" (Let me know who you are!) All of your reviews are such motivation for me to keep on writing. This past year has been a rough one. I lost my mother. I also lost that "feeling" to write. My dream was to have my name up on a bookshelf and after I lost her, I lost that feeling. It has since been creeping back to me and I just want you all to know that you are such an inspiration. Much much love to you all. Tacky as this is, I would adore to get to know you all better. Again, much love.

Clara's stiff legs still hadn't completely woken up as she pushed down hard on the pedals. She felt them burn and she roughed through the cold, early morning air. Her heart raced. Fear flooded her and she prayed. She felt the gravel spit back up to her with her speed and the cold air burn her lungs. It felt like she was riding forever when she saw a group of people gathered around outside of Daisy and Martin's house. People she had never seen before in her life. Her first instinct was to ride right into them and take them out. Then she saw Daisy standing next to Martin, calm, cool, and collected. The sisters made eye contact and Daisy jogged to her. Clara came to a screeching halt, kicking up dirt and rocks all over. Merle backed into the shadows near the fence. She jumped off her bike and whipped out a knife. Daisy smiled and put her hand up on the knife.

"Clara, its okay. Don't worry. There's no danger. Put that thing away," she said in a hushed tone while staring at the kids. "You'll scare those kids."

"What?" she asked. She looked around at these new people. They drank her image in and wondered just how a man like Merle Dixon landed someone so soft looking like her. She took a deep breath. "Who are these people?" she asked with slight venom in her words. "What's going on, Dais?"

"Well, you see, we were sleepin' an we heard an engine outside. We came out and we..uhm..well," Daisy started and motioned for Clara to turn around. Clara heard footsteps approach her from behind. She quickly swung around and was face to face with Daryl, who let out a breath of relief and joy at the sight of her. Clara's hands went to her mouth in disbelief and tears filled her eyes. She tried to talk, but sobs came out. Beside herself with joy, confusion, and a bit of fear, Clara jumped into Daryl's arms and hugged him tight, letting sobs out and tears flow. She felt his face. His hair. She breathed him in and hugged him tight. Merle tried not to run and grab her. He kept himself in the dark.

"Daryl?" she she asked in a whispered cry. He grabbed her hands and gave them a kiss.

"That's me," he laughed shyly at her, trying to remain the tough demeanor he gained with the group. He knew it wouldn't last long if he were near Clara. She brought out the kid in everyone. At this point though, he could care less and he gave her a bigger smile. The smile she remembered. The smile she missed.

"This isn't real. I have dreams like this all the time," she sadly said as she let his hands go. Daryl watched her helplessly as she took small steps backwards. "I'll wake up. I'll feel the empty side of my bed. I'll listen for you outside working on your truck with your Willie Nelson blarin'."

All couldn't help but watch on with pity for this woman they knew nothing about. They only imagined just how vulnerable and scared she was in front of everyone. They saw how empty she was and how this was all mean dream to her. Daryl bit his lip and ignored the mist he held in his eyes. Carol and Andrea kept glancing at one another. Nobody knew what would happen next.

Clara's steps shuffled against the gravel as she leaned against the fence and took everyone in. Merle held his breath and locked eyes with Daryl as she stood right next to him in the shadows, completely unknowing. She stood there for a bit of time making sure to remember everyone's face.

Daryl.

Daisy.

Martin.

A scruffy looking man with tired eyes and a badge of sorts on his chest.

A thin pregnant woman.

A little boy in a sheriff's hat.

A frail looking woman with hair shorter than her own.

A petite little girl who was clutching a dirty teddy bear.

An older worn man in need of a haircut.

A brown haired girl who held hands with Asian boy.

A pretty blonde girl no more than seventeen.

A black man in need of a cigarette by the way his fingers twitched.

A black woman with a worn cloak who needed a stiff drink.

A hard looking blonde woman with holes in her jeans.

They all stared at her and Merle. They all pitied her. She laughed at them uncomfortably. Daisy held her tears back for her sister and gave her a warm smile in hopes of realizing this was not a dream.

"This is just a nightmare," she whispered to Merle. He let his breath go and rubbed his elbow out of nervousness. "My dreams are usually good ones. Happy memories. This is just downright mean and sneaky. It's too real to be real."

"Ya not dreamin'. Ya not," he whispered back to her. She let tears slide sadly off of her cheeks and into the dirt. Clara turned her head to him and looked up slowly. He was greeted with her empty green eyes and a sad smile.

"You need to go away. This never happened. This is scary," she said. Merle wanted so badly just to reach out and take her in his arms. "I wake up when you go. You need to go. I need to wake up right now," she said as she slid to the cold ground and crossed her legs, burying her head into her hands.

"I can't go," was all he could muster out as he went to the ground with her. She scrambled away from him quickly and stumbled her way back up. He followed her carefully.

"You need to go. This is not right. This is so unfair! Why?" she shouted at him. He stared at her with longing and guilt. "Why are you here tonight? Are we going back to a holiday? Are we going to the bar? A ride on your bike? What do you want from me?!" she screamed at him to his face. This time, without hesitation, Merle grabbed her tightly around her arm and put his stump around her waist.

"PIANO MAN!" he shouted back into her face, startling her. Everyone held their breath in silence. Daryl shifted uneasily and Carol rubbed the small of his back. The group was lost as to what was going on in front of them. Daisy held Martin 's hand with hope in her eyes.

She stared at him and he at her for what seemed like forever. Piano Man was what he called her before he knew her name. He never called her that in any of her dreams. She caught her breath and felt his rough hand loosen it's grip without letting her go. She looked deeply at him, searching for anything human. Anything real. She had such a hard time with that lately.

It was just him and her. This moment. This time. Nobody else was there. He blocked them out. She looked as beautiful as the last time he saw her. Nothing about her changed. Her hair. Her smell. Her eyes. Her nose. He went over every little detail of her. Relishing in it and fearing it she would disappear.

"Sing me a song, piano man," he whispered into her ear. She felt burning hot tears well up in her eyes as she took in his scent. "Sin' me a song, t'night. Well I'm 'n th' mood for a melody. Ya got me feelin' a'right." Merle brought his forehead down to hers and looked into her eyes. "What's goin' on 'ere?"

She cried. She broke down to the ground with him and he took her into his arms and held her tightly. She sobbed into his chest as she put her hands all over him, feeling everywhere she could. He broke a smile for her and she shook.

"Merle?" It was the first time she had said his name and his heart raced. He nodded, speechless.

"Clara," he whispered as he rocked her gently in his arms. She trembled and held him tight. Sniffling into his shirt, she propped herself up and looked around at everyone and smiled for Daryl. They all looked warmly at her. She looked at Merle with a clear head on her shoulders.

"Merle? Your hand?" she managed out. He looked up at Rick, who bit his lip, and smiled for her.

"Oh that's a long story."

Clara and Merle sat silently on the ground and stayed embraced. The group slowly formed a circle around the reunited couple, turned around, and took their weapons out.

Everyone took watch that morning.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N - I am so sorry about the delayed update. I've been busy these past few days. The group of you, your reviews are so kind and gracious. I want to continue to write use for you. Thank you so much. I look forward to your reviews. To your words. Such inspiration.

Much love,

Kadie.

_"Dixons!" shouted Principal Richmond. "Detention! The both of you!" The older man stomped to the boys and grabbed Daryl by his ear and Merle by his sleeve. "The two of you are ridiculous. When in the hell are you going to grow up?"_

_"Let him go, Richmond. Ya gonna rip 'is ear off," Merle said between gritted teeth as they dragged along in the hallway. Daryl chuckled._

_"I'm fine, bro. No worries. Don't even hurt."_

_The three of them stopped short in front of the detention room. A sign was taped to the door which the three of them read 'Detention will be held in the music room until further notice."_

_"This is horseshit," Richmond mumbled._

_"Vulgarity is the crutch to a crippled vocabulary, Principal Richmond," said Daryl with such sarcasm it made even Merle laugh._

_"Shut the fuck up, Dixon."_

_Richmond turned the two of them around and headed toward the music room. Once they arrived, he opened the door with such force, it slammed against the wall. He threw the two of them in and they bumped into the table, disrupting a fellow kid in detention. The young, black man looked up at the three of them and shook his head._

_"Ya should apol'gize, Richmond," Merle said. _

_"Me? Apologize to two stupid rednecks and a nigger?" he laughed. "Stay in here until the final bell rings." Richmond wiped the sweat from his brow and shut the door hard behind him. The three young men stared at each other and the Dixons took a seat on the opposite side of the table. They sat in silence until the black kid spoke up._

_"What did you guys do?" he asked._

_"Came t' school," said Merle._

_"In'trestin," he said. Merle sat up and started walking around, observing the few instruments that were in the music room. He strummed a very out of tune guitar and walked on. He picked up a flute and threw it back down. When he heard from the other side of the room, someone playing the piano, he jumped in shock. Turning around to the music, he saw the back of a girl's head. _

_"Who th' hell is that?" he asked harshly. Daryl shrugged and before the other boy could say anything, Merle spoke up. "Hey! Piano Man!"_

_"She has a name if you ask nicely," the other boy said._

_"Who're you?" he asked._

_"Name's Martin."_

_"Martin. Shut up," he said. Daryl shook is head in annoyance of his brother. "Piano Man? Gotta name?" he asked again. She turned her head slightly and continued to play._

_"I do. I'll tell you if ask nicely," she said. Martin laughed._

_"Mr. Piano Man? Can I have your name?" he asked in an angelic voice. _

_"Say please." she said as her fingers danced on the keys._

_"No," he laughed._

_"Then no," she responded. He took a few steps toward her._

_"Fine. Only cause Im'ma gentleman. Please?"_

_"My name is Clara. What's yours Mr. Ignorance?"_

_"I'm Merle. This'ere is my brother Daryl," he said. The girl stopped playing and turned around and Merle felt his heart stop for a moment and sweat begin to pump through as he locked eyes with hers. _

_"Merle. Daryl. It's nice to meet you."_

They had been on the cold, gritty ground until the sun came up. His arms tightened around her when he felt her shake as a chill past through the both of them. Clara shifted in is arms and brought her hand up to his scruffy face. He kissed it as it past his lips. She felt his stubbly cheeks and grazed his eyebrow with her delicate finger. He brought his forehead down to her again and smiled. She let a silent tear fall from her face.

" I'm not dreaming?" she asked in such a tone that it reminded him of a child's.

"Want me to pinch you?" he replied. She chuckled and nodded. He obliged with a tiny sharp pinch to her arm.. She let out a quiet giggle and wrapped her arms around his neck. With wobbly feet, he managed to stand with her in his arms and he scooped her up. With a tired grunt, he started towards Daryl, who turned when he heard the movement.

"Hey," he said to them.

"Hey yourself," said Clara with an exhausted tone as he rested her head on Merle's shoulder. Daisy and Martin came up beside them. "You need to take a warm, wet rag to that face."

"I missed you too, Clara," he said with a smile.

Slowly, the group had made their way to them, quietly and respectfully. There was no danger in the air. A heavy relief to everyone. Clara started to get down and straightened herself out, dusting her pants and fixing her hair. She looked at the people before her and waved to everyone. They all gave her an awkward wave back. She took a deep breath and looked at her husband then her sister.

"So," Daisy started."I have a shit ton of instant coffee left and the milk is still fresh from Cloyde yesterday. Let's get inside. Can't be getting chilled and sick now."

Everyone's eyes lit up at the sound of coffee and milk. Daryl was thrilled alone that Cloyde was still alive. Daisy and Martin led the way and Daryl was third to last in the line that had formed. Merle and Clara lingered behind and watched them all enter the large home. Merle swallowed hard and stopped in his tracks. Clara glanced at him.

"I don't know 'f I should," he said defeatedly. She gave him a weak smile and took his hand. She was as warm as he remembered and and brought her in for a hug. "I have so much to tell ya. Ta explain." Clara gave a small sigh.

"I know you do. I know," she whispered and nodded to him. She gently tugged on his hand and encouraged him to come along. He felt ashamed and embarrassed, but Clara made that disappear with a smile. The smile that was his.

They were last to get into the quiet house and Clara shut the door gently, not wanting to wake up Shawn and grabbed one of Daisy's cardigans off the coat tree and slipped into it. She warmed up instantly and ran her fingers through her hair. All the while, she couldn't keep her eyes off of Merle, fearing he would disappear.

He looked uncomfortable. He stood to himself as everyone tried to get comfortable in the large living room. Carol and Lori were quick to help Daisy in the kitchen. Martin was showing off his weapon collection to Andrea, Rick, T-Dog, and Michonne. Hershel, Glenn, Maggie, and Beth took a seat on the couch and were silently discussing where they were and what else was nearby. Daryl stood and observed his surroundings while watching the kids play with a deck of cards he found on their last run.

They were all content. Everything was calm. Everything was serene for one in such a long time.

"Can I get you something," Clara asked Merle nervously. He only shook his head no. She nodded and smiled and motioned for him to sit. He felt T-Dog's eyes on him the entire time, but he ignored it and focused on Clara, who sat cross legged in the corner of the couch and had draped a throw over her legs. She noticed the tenseness between the two and took it in. "Why is he looking at you like that?" she said, taking Merle by surprise. He licked his lips and brought his eyes to hers.

"We didn' see eye t' eye, is all. We're good now. I just gotta talk to 'im 'bout somthin'."

"Merle Dixon, I swear if you treated him or that woman out there badly cause of the color of their skin, or that quiet boy over there for that matter," she said motioning to Glenn. "We are going to have a discussion." she said with a blunt tone. Merle nodded bit his lip like a schoolboy who was in trouble.

"I think we might have to," he said honestly. Clara jumped up and grabbed his sleeve and yanked him up, or at least tried to, and pointed to the den. Merle sighed and obliged. Clara looked around to make sure nobody was listening and turned to face him.

"What happened?"

"We really gotta do this now? Can't I just lookit ya awhile?"

"I don't know who those drugs made you, but whoever it was was not the man I married and it sure as hell was not the man I missed this whole time. Whatever happened between you guys happened. It does not go forward. I will have no animosity here. Not with what is at risk. Do you understand?"

Merle swallowed hard and nodded.

"I've been counting the days f' you," he said. She wrinkled her brow in confusion. "I've been clean a year now. Rick out there threw it off th' roof. I was gone'a'while and Daryl used my stash to help e'vryone who got sick. Including T-Dog out there." They stood in silence and Clara nodded and crossed her arms. "The more I came down the more of a bastard I realized I had become."

"You were a real big bastard." she added.

"I regret the day I ever started using," he breathed out. Clara shook her head and began to protest. He put his fingers to her mouth. "No. We jus' found each other and I'm gonna tell you what I got to tell you. I need to clear this. Fo' the both 'f us."

Her eyes glazed over in tears and he continued, reaching for her hands and giving them a kiss.

"I can't remember a lot, t' be honest. I remember being mad. I was so mad at th' world. Mos'ly myself. Then you, we," he started and got choked up. Clara squeezed his hands as he let a tear fall, trying to contain himself and failing miserably, he silently sobbed and she couldn't hold back her tears with him. He fell into her hug and cried into her shoulder.

"This is a crazy new world, Merle Dixon. It's scary and unreal. I don't know what happened toward the end of the old one, but you can make things right in this one. I missed you so much and I wanted to help you so badly. We all did."

"I was a coward," he said with shame.

"You had an addiction. It changed you. You weren't you the last time I saw you. You were gone, but you're here now. Right now. With me. We can fix what was messed up. That's not cowardly."

"I want to fix ev'rythin'. I need you."

"I need you too. I prayed for you and Daryl every single night to find me."

"Please have me. If not, I wouldn't blame ya. I'll leave right now," he whispered. She smiled through her tears and ran her fingers through his hair.

"I'll never turn you away, Merle. You're my husband. I love you. That will never change. There are things to fix, but it's nothing we can't handle."

"I wish I could take it all 'f it back. I wish I could've been 'ere when all this started. To protect ya." he said. Clara let out a quiet laugh and pressed her body to his.

"You can start now," she whispered with a small smile. Relief washed over Merle and it made him feel like a new man. He hugged her so tight and smoothed her head. He took in her scent and kissed the top of her head as she snuggled her head into his chest. They were quietly interrupted by Daisy and Daryl, who had been looking for them. They stood in the doorway and Daisy smiled at them while Daryl gave them a quizzical look.

"Coffee is ready, guys," said Daisy. She gently pulled Daryl away by the sleeve and left them alone again. Clara smiled. A small part of her still believed this was a dream. A larger part of her didn't want to wake up if it was. All was calm and collected. Merle was back.

"I sai' some nasty things to 'em," he said. Clara took a breath and a step back.

"Well then, you'll just have to apologize to them then. Won't you?"

She grinned, turned, and walked into the living room to grab a coffee and introduce herself to these new people. The new members of whatever group it was they had.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N- A bit of a short one here. Busy week. I just wrote this after an argument I witnessed at work today. People are so crude, I swear. Anyways, I should be picking up my pace the rest of this week. I got some free time on my hands, so my fingers are crossed. Reviews are always welcome and greatly appreciated. My loyal followers are simply beautiful and amazing. You guys fill me with inspiration and glee. Also, if by chance you would like some answers to anything regarding the story, please feel free to PM me. I'd love to answer.

Here is a little flashback. Nothing long, but it clears some things up cultural wise. I hope the out of order flashbacks aren't confusing to anyone. I thought it would add a bit of flare. I saw a writer do this and I just love the technique.

Please enjoy and as always,

Much love.

Kadie.

_"Ya no good pieces of shit!" growled Mr. Dixon as he threw Merle against the kitchen counter. Merle caught himself and stood tall after collecting himself. Puffing his thick chest out, he prepared himself for more. His father stumbled to him and clocked him right in the face, causing Merle to bite down on his lip, drawing blood. He then felt a blow to his left eye and it throbbed immensely._

_"Outta ya system yet, Pa?"_

_"Not yet you nigger lover," drooled his father. "Since when you like blackies, son? Tha' whole family is fucked. They all niggers and they got that sweet piece of vanilla for a daughter. How tha' even work?!"_

_"It's called being adopted, you prick!" shouted Merle. His father gave him a blow to his gut. Heaving over, he heard his father call out for Daryl. Merle's brotherly instinct kicked in and with all his might, lunged for his father and grabbed him by the collar._

_"Ya ain't gonna protect 'im forever. He like them too? Ya both shameful!" he spat._

_"Ya not gonna touch him! Not ever 'gain. Ya done and beat on us one too many a time. It's over!" he shouted at his father and let him go roughly. So much so that he lost his balance and fell into the table. Merle shook his head in disgust. _

_Merle walked out of the kitchen and went right to his and Daryl's room. He immediately started packing and gave Daryl a hard glare. Daryl didn't even need to ask why._

_"Where ya going, Merle?" he asked, putting down his magazine. Merle went to the small closet and grabbed a duffle bag. He threw it hard to Daryl and continued to fit whatever he could into his own bag. Daryl picked it up and looked at it quizzically._

_"We're leavin'. We ain't got no business 'ere no more."_

_"Merle we can't just up an' leave. We got nowhere t' go."_

_"I made a deal with Roy down at the bar. I work for 'im for rent above the joint and a 'undred cash at the end of the week. It'll have to do f' now. Until we find somethin'' better. Now pack up."_

_"But Merle," Daryl started. He looked still like such a child in Merle's eyes. He didn't let his little brother finish his sentence._

_"Mama told me to look after ya before she died. She said to make sure you come up right. She told me I would have at find my way to the rightness and I did. You did too. We will be nothin' of we stay 'ere," he told him firmly. They both swallowed the hard lumps in their throats. "Mama would 'ave wanted us outta 'ere. She woulda done it 'erself."_

_They stood quietly as they listened to their father stumble and grunt in the kitchen, cursing his children and even going as far as cursing their mother for her awful creations because they were clearly 'no sons of his'. _

_Daryl grabbed the bag and walked over to his dresser and began stuffing his clothes in. He stuffed until it wouldn't zip. Merle managed to pack all of his important belongings in two bags. When they were finished, they looked at each other with concern written on their faces._

_"Sure this is a good idea?" asked Daryl. Looking around their room one final time, Merle noticed a photo of their mother, Merle, and Daryl when he was a baby. He reached over and picked it up and put it in his bag. Looking back at Daryl, he nodded and gave him a grin._

_"I ain't good with ideas," he said back._

_"I'll be eighteen soon. Ya don't gotta do this."_

_"I've gotta. We have t' leave this place. Understand?"_

_Daryl nodded slowly and they both took a breath. They walked briskly through the trailer, disregarding the foul words that escaped their father's lips. Once they reached the pickup, they threw their bags in the bed and Daryl hopped in through the window and removed the keys from his pocket. Merle got behind the wheel and waited for his brother to give him his keys.. He wanted to let the engine warm up in the cool late September air. Suddenly Daryl perked up with slight worry. _

_"Hang on. I'll be right back. Don' go nowhere," he said and jumped out of the car._

_"Boy, where the hell am I gonna go with no keys? Think about tha'. Where in the hell am I gonna go?" he asked with frustration. Daryl growled and ran behind the trailer and to the shed. Merle tapped his fingers on the wheel and silently bet with himself that his father wouldn't come out for more trouble. _

_He heard Daryl's footsteps stumbling and saw him come from behind the trailer with something in his hold. Merle nodded to himself and silently laughed within. Daryl threw his crossbow in the back and hopped back into the truck. He looked at Merle and his face flushed._

_"Can I go now, numb nuts?" he asked Daryl with a chuckle. Daryl smiled and they were off._


	8. Chapter 8

A/N It's been a hectic week here. With work, constant headaches, and the weather being so gosh darn wet and with a power outage, I give to you the next chapter. It's not as Clara and Merle focused as the previous ones. I wanted to let the group get their feel of the group on the road. Introductions rather. I hope you all enjoy. I don't know if this is vain or not, but I was kind of bummed on the amount of reviews I've gotten this past week. I love all your words, but I love to know if you are all enjoying my story. It keeps me motivated and it let's me know to continue. I appreciate the loyal group of you that have been reading. Thank you so very much.

Hugs and High Fives.

Kadie.

Merle made the talk with T-Dog and Glenn in the privacy of the den. The last thing he needed was his entire group think he turned into a pansy. For a split second thought turning into a walker would have been a better option. When the three of them came out of the den, Merle was the last in line with a red face while T-Dog and Glenn came out in with satisfied smiles on theirs.

"I swear t' God, ya guys," he said as he stopped at the end of the couch. He watched them until they sat then took a seat himself next to Daryl and Clara, who sipped at her coffee with her eyes locked on Merle. She smiled behind the mug and only he saw, giving a small grin back for her. He knew right then and there that she would blow the hard ass, racist, arrogant, cover he had been holding with his group. Deep down he knew he was none of those things. Hard ass, maybe. She would out him. This was only the beginning.

"Ahh," Daisy said as she sat up straight. "Merle, Glenn, and," she struggled with T-Dog's name. "T-Bag?"

Nobody was really able to keep a straight face. Even T-Dog himself. Once the laughter died down he spoke quickly.

"Dog. T-Dog."

""Right," she continued. "Well anyway. Rick just got done telling us how your group came to be. I'm sorry for your losses," she said softly. Merle's eyes went straight to Daryl, who's hand was being held by Carol who sat at his feet indian-style. Daryl was the only one brave enough to end Dale's suffering. Merle couldn't bring himself to do it and for that Daryl manned up a lot more in Merle's eyes. "We suffered ourselves. Friends. Family. We can only assume. God above has blessed this road. We all made it. Granted we aren't an army of many, but we have each other."

"We're all we need," added Martin, who clasped Daisy's hand and looked over to Clara, giving her a warm smile.

"It's not to say we couldn't build what we have," Clara said. "We can. It would be tight around here, but we would love to have you guys. My family and I have a pretty good judge of character," she went on and nudged Daryl with a playful grin. "I speak for all of us when we say we can trust you."

"But can we trust you?" asked Andrea with curiosity. "I mean you came at us with a blade." Merle glared at her in defense toward his wife. Clara understood why she said it and didn't blame her at all. She sighed and spoke softly.

"It was before dawn and there were strange noises. I'm surprised I didn't kill anybody," she said. "I know you would have done the same."

Andrea nodded with slight embarrassment and put herself in Clara's position. Michonne nodded with complete understanding as did everybody else. Carl and Sophia stayed in the corner of the room playing with Shawn's Legos and had been listening in on the adults. They both looked at the group in puzzlement and continued with the building.

"It's been quite a few hours," acknowledged Daisy. "We should radio the others on the road."

"Davy and Lulu live next door and Jarred and Brandon live in the house after them," Martin began explaining. "There's two empty houses on the left side of the road. One that's been empty for years. The other belonged to Harry and Janet. They took off when the disease was spreading."

The conversing continued for a long while. The suddenness of it all was nerve racking for Merle. He would tense to the point of shaking. It would immediately subside with Clara's touch. Their eyes locked while the others made plans, but the noise was blocked out. She softly smiled at him and squeezed his knee. The sound of the ceiling creaking stopped all the chatter and Clara quickly jumped up with Daisy and Martin.

"Mom? Dad?" asked Shawn with an apprehensive voice coming from the top of the stairs. The three of them clashed into each other at the base of the steps, but quickly put on their cool with warm smiles.

"Morning, baby," said Daisy.

"What's going on?" he asked as he took a step back with a hint of fear. Clara's heart broke slightly, but she ran her fingers through her hair and looked at Martin, who was struggling with his words. "Aunt Clara? Are there people here?"

"Honeybaby, why don't you come down?" she responded to him.

With hesitation, he started coming down the stairs. Clad in his sweatpants and a tee shirt, he felt a chill rise up with the concerned look in his mother's eyes. Once he reached the bottom, he saw everybody and trembled slightly. Martin's firm hold on his shoulder reassured him in only a way they understood. Clara smiled at him and he returned it. Turning to his mom, he gave her a hug and Daisy quickly wiped a falling tear away.

"Shawn," Daisy started. "Did you hear any commotion during the night?"

"No. Nothing out of the ordinary."

"Well," she started, setting him down to sit at the bottom step. "We had some visitors. They're waiting in the living room."

"Who are they?"

"People who got lost out there," added Clara. "Trying to find safety. One man is a sheriff. There are a couple of kids about your age. A boy and a girl," she explained. Sensing the slight fear and curiosity in his face, she cut to the chase. "There is no danger."

"We're sure of it," said Martin. They all watched his tense face and body relax and gave each other an unsure look.

"You guys aren't telling me something," added Shawn.

"Jesus Christ! Can you just stop being so smart for five minutes?" asked Clara with a laugh. Shawn smiled and stood.

"What is it?"

"Go and look," said Daisy.

Shawn started taking hesitant steps toward the living room. They followed him close behind and watched him take everybody in. The group looked at him with curiosity. Carl and Sophia picked their heads up and looked at him with awe.

Merle let out a small gasp and Daryl let his jaw drop. Shawn had grown quite a bit since they last saw him. He stood tall with short dreadlocks. He had Daisy's soft features and Martin's eyes. When he saw Merle, a huge smile spread across his face, taking everyone, again, completely by surprise. Merle stood and Shawn ran to him, wrapping his arms around the mans waist while Merle burrowed his fingers through his hair and engulfed him, hugging the boy tight.

"I thought you were dead," he whispered into Merle's stomach.

"Nah, kiddo. I ain't goin' out like that," he told him.

"Neither am I," said Daryl. Shawn gasped and let go of Merle and jumped to Daryl, tackling him on the couch. He ruffled the boys locks and hugged him tight. Daisy and Martin walked over to their seats and Clara went back over near Merle, giving him a relieved smile.

"Everyone," Martin said. "This is mine and Daisy's son, Shawn. Say hello to everyone, Shawn."

Second introductions were made with haste. Soon, the young man had made his way over to Carl and Sophia, as his parents hoped he would do so they can get down to making arrangements. Lori shifted awkwardly as she rubbed her slowly growing belly. It got Clara's attention and she quickly looked away and swallowed the lump in her throat.

"How many have you had wander up here?" asked Rick. They all held their breaths as Martin counted in his head.

"Ten. Twenty tops. Since this fiasco started at least."

They all stared in awe. All were curious as to how they kept the walkers to such an impressive minimum. Seeing their faces, Martin began to explain how he, Davy, Jarred, and Brandon went out for one week, raiding every hardware store, hardware depot, nursery, and even vacant homes to get enough tall fencing to surround their area. It impressed the hell out of Rick and the men of his group, who shook their heads in wonder.

"It only took you one week?" asked Rick. Martin glanced over to Lori and Carl.

"It would have only taken you one week too," he said. Rick nodded with a slight smile. He held Lori's hand and she rubbed the small of his back. Everyone had sleep in their faces. It was what they all craved. What they all needed. Even Hershel was caught dozing off on the chair he was seated in. The comfort was overwhelming. Clara stood and took the small throw off the couch. Maggie nodded her thanks and Clara gave her a smile. She quietly walked over and draped the throw over his shoulders and motioned for everyone to whisper.

"Like I said earlier," she started as she took her seat and sipped her coffee. "It will be a tight fit. A really tight fit. But it needs to be done," she whispered as her gaze went to the kids and then Lori. "It has to be. We can figure it out."

Nobody complained.

"Alright," spoke Martin. "It's already a bit late, but I need to make that trip to town." Daisy started to speak up and spoke words of persuasion, but she was hushed by him. "I need to, baby."

"Let some of us come with you," said Rick. "Please? It's the least we can do. We can get much more supplies."

"I'm quick on my feet," said Glenn.

"I'm goin' r'guardless," said Daryl.

"Guys, really. I can go solo."

"Shut up, Mart an' accept some help," said Merle as he stood. Martin laughed and looked at Daisy and Clara, who looked hopeful. With a sigh, he nodded and took a stand.

"T-Dog," Rick started. "Take watch on the roof. Daryl, Merle, Glenn. We go. Lets prepare the van.

"You ladies figure out where in the hell everyone gonna be staying'," said Martin. "I'll stop over by Jarred and Brandon's and explain to them all this. I'll have Brandon come on over. As well as Lulu."

The next hour wasn't as hectic as Clara thought it would be. The men gathered up outside, leaving T-Dog and Hershel, who was still napping, to watch over the ladies. Soon Brandon and Lulu would be there and even more introductions would be made. It all still felt like a strange dream. She walked outside with Merle and they stopped at the gate. She poked his waist and got his attention.

"Be careful."

"That ain't too exciting," he said. She smiled at him. "I will. Always am."

"This is all so fast."

"I know."

"Well I will be making living arrangements. Shouldn't be too bad."

"An' you tellin' me to be careful," he snickered. She laughed at him.

"And still the subject of you hand hasn't come up."

Merle turned red and laughed it off, putting his stump behind his back and in his pocket.

"Surprised I hadn't lost a part o' me sooner. This is nothin'," he said.

"Please come back here with your legs. I can be your hands. I can't be carrying you around everywhere."

"I'll find a wheelchair just in case."

Silence took them and she looked over at the men getting ready. She smiled with a tear in her eye. Licking her lips, she went closer to him and hugged him tight.

"Come back to me," she whispered and turned and walked back into the house. Merle sighed and scratched his head and hopped into the van.

"Come on ya dipshits. We losin' daylight by the minute!" he shouted. Glenn hopped in beside him.

"Did you learn that in science class, Merle?" asked Glenn as he and Daryl hopped in.

"Blow off, China."

"Merle, really?" asked Martin, who sat in the front along with Rick. "Kids Korean. Plain as day."

Glenn sighed and raised his hands in triumph.

"Finally," he said softly.


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note / I would like to first apologize about the delay in updates. These past two weeks have been tiring. I fought with a sinus infection all last week and it escalated into a throat infection. It was awful and to be honest I am still feeling a bit under the weather. But much much better. I trekked to the New York Comic Con against doctor's orders. I had an absolute blast. All four days. As the right hand man of my boyfriends comic shop, I felt obligated at first, but made my own fun once I got there.

So all is well now. Well, getting better.

This is longer than I first thought, but I have already started on Chapter 10. As always, your reviews keep me going.

Hugs and High Fives,

Kadie

The trip to Laurenceville went off without a hitch. There were a few stray walkers in the faraway distance, but none worth losing ammo over. They all went over their lists a final time, checking and making sure they got what was needed. They grabbed whatever food they could find. More so now that there were a lot more mouths to feed.

Jarred and Davy met them at the supermarket where everyone's brief introductions took place after Martin had radioed them both the news. They all wanted to be in and out and get back to the houses. In the end, both vehicles were stocked full of unperishables and the items on the list. Merle laughed as he looked over Clara's wants. He would have remembered her tea even without the list. Tucking it in his back pocket, he shook Davy and Jarred's hands in a thankful manner.

"Its sure fine to see your face again, Merle. Daryl's too," said Jarred.

"We all thought you was both gone," Davy added. Merle sighed and nudged Daryl, who threw a box of gauze and aniseptic in the back seat.

"He woulda been. Saved his ass," Daryl chimed as he wiped his hands on his jeans.

"Can it. Where's Rick and Korea?"

"Comin' now if ya'd look."

Merle couldn't argue. Daryl did come for him when the world went horrid. Hell if it weren't for Daryl and Rick, throwing away his drugs, he would probably be dead. He would never openly admit it, but he made sure to show both of them respect. No matter what.

"Talk to me like that again," Merle threatened. Daryl flipped him off and quickly, Merle grabbed his finger and bent it, making Daryl growl with pain.

"You two knock it off?" said Rick as he put more bags in and closed the door. Merle let go of Daryl with a grin and Daryl continued to flip him off.

"They've been like that forever," Jarred laughed. Glenn appeared beside all the men with another bag of full of any medical supplies and snacks he could get his hands on. Rick ran his fingers through his growing hair and sighed. Looking up he took note of the darkening sky.

"We should head back," he said. Glenn nodded as well as the rest of the men when that familiar sound caught them off guard. The moans and drooling sound of teeth and lips slapping together made time pause for a second.

The walker looked like he couldn't have been more than twenty. It's black lips and red eyes tore through the parking lot and made its way for them. Grunting and growling with every step and looking for balance of sorts. Martin grabbed his gun with sweat on his brow and aimed for the things head. Before Rick could protest about the use of a gun in this situation, Daryl had his bow ready and shot the thing in the throat and watched it stumble back as Merle aimed one of his blades and flung it across the way. It sounded like cutting through a bruised orange. The handle of the blade stuck out between the things eyes and it fell to the ground with what looked like a relieved grace. They all saw it and thought the same thing. Daryl patted Merle on the shoulder as he went to Martin.

"Sorry Mart," he said.

"Why is that?" the man said defeatedly. Rick stepped closer to him and looked around for any more threats.

"That shot would have brought on more walkers. Silence is key," he explained. Martin nodded in understanding and slight embarrassment. He knew better than to fire a shot for just one stray walker.

Merle and Daryl walked over to the corpse and retrieved their belongings, wiping the gore off of them with a washcloth that Merle kept in his pocket. Jarred and Davy jumped into their truck and everyone else squeezed into the van and off they went.

The ride back was silent. Light chatter came from ahead. Martin and Rick had hit it off very well and discussed a bit about life before the world went. Glenn had fallen asleep, his head thudding softly against a pillow he grabbed back at the store. Rick saw him in the rear view mirror and couldn't help but smile just a bit for the boy.

In the back was Merle and Daryl. They both had been looking out their windows and making an occasional sigh. They glanced at each other every so often and went back to their thoughts. A short amount of time had passed when Daryl spoke up.

"Fuck it t' hell," he said softly as he reached down into his bag and retrieved a bag of what looked to be Sour Patch Kids. Merle laughed and gave his little brother a look.

"Still like on t'em things," he asked. Daryl opened and popped a yellow one in his mouth and sucked the sour sugar off and let Merle know his answer. His face twisted in slight delight at the sour lemon candy. Time shed off of him to Merle. Seeing him eat that reminded him of when he was younger.

"So," Daryl started. "What'd Clara say? Y'all were talkin' for awhile in the den." Merle shifted and sighed. A small smile spread on his face.

"She said she wants t' work everything out. That we can fix what I fucked up," he whispered. Daryl nudged him and gave him some candy.

"Told ya she'd get ya."

"Won't been here if not 'f you. Thanks for knockin' sense in t' me," said, looking down from his brother's gaze.

"Least I could do, I guess."

"Ya didn't have to do anything. I'm supposed t' be the one takin' care of you."

"Been a grown up for awhile, now," he kid. Merle scoffed and popped a candy into his mouth.

"Damnit. Ya know I hardly ever do this. This whole day, of all these shitty days, made me realize even more that we ain't promised a minute from now, so rememb'r this. You're a good man, Daryl."

The younger Dixon's face relaxed at his brother's words. He swallowed the smile he was about to give Merle and just nodded, giving Merle a nudge.

"So are you," he told him. Merle laughed and patted his Daryl's back.

"I was. I got 'lot mo' making' up t' do 'fore I can get that title back, baby brother."

Daryl chuckled and ate another candy.

The rest of the trip was quiet. The occasional static spurts of the walkie followed by Davy or Jarred on the other end giving them answers Rick was taken by the lightheartedness of this group after Jarred cracked a joke to them. He couldn't wrap his mind around it but figured it was for the better.

"I tried to explain to Brandon that the human body has only two-hundred and six bones. But when I'm with him my body has two-hundred and seven."

Rick was let out a light laugh as he looked in the mirror and saw Merle laughing with tears running down his face.

_ Merle and Daryl Dixon? Pals with a family of blacks and a gay couple? Must've been the drugs that made that other man, _he thought._ It had to have been._

They went back and fourth with the jokes until they reached the gates that the men had set up in the beginning of all this mess. Martin got out and worked it open as Rick and Merle took watch around him. Rick was surely impressed. The gate was extremely secure from the looks of it and everything was hidden in brush. How it took only a week is beyond him. It made sense though. There were no houses other than these. It was a lone road with far away neighbors.

"There were people who tried to break in one day," Martin started as he was playing with getting the lock to the gate. "They raided anything of value for out there. Food. Some clothes. Whatever medicine we had." his voice tightened as he looked up at Rick and Merle, who was breathing hard and biting his lip. "One had a gun to Daisy's head the whole time outside as they were lootin'," he went on with the beginnings of tears in his eyes, focusing on the lock. "They tied me and Shawn up and Shawn screamed. Clara heard it," he said, locking eyes with Merle. "She came barreling up here like she was this mornin'. She jumped off that bike of hers and the next thing we knew there was a knife sticking out the man's head. Next day, me and the guys started on this."

"She killed a man?" Merle said to himself. Martin looked back at him and shrugged.

"She likes to think of it as putting him out of his misery."

The lock opened and the men pulled the gate wide. Merle was clearly shaken. He almost didn't believe Martin. The cold in his eyes proved otherwise to Merle. He imagined it. He imagined how scared Daisy must have been. How vulnerable Martin and Shawn were. How lost Clara was. He shook as he pictured her throwing a blade at a man. He was proud. He felt guilty. He couldn't help but feel as though he failed her again.

"Merle?"'said Rick, getting his attention. Merle looked at him and took a breath. "Merle?"

"Yeah. I'm comin'," he said as he hopped back into the van after everything was locked back up. Shaken couldn't sum up how he was feeling. Rick gave him a reassuring pat on the back and off they went.

Earlier.

"Some of you will have to share rooms. I hope you don't mind," said Daisy as she held Shawn's dry erase board up in front of everyone. Lulu entered the room with a plate of cookies and juice boxes for the kids and busied them into the corner of the room, away from the conversation.

"Stay here you guys, okay? Want me to read you guys a book or something?"

"Lu," said Shawn. "We got it." The dark haired woman nodded sadly but with a smile on her face and began to walk away. Carl and Sophia looked at each other and then at Shawn. His short dreadlocks tilted with the motion of his head and he sighed.

"Lulu?" asked Sophia. The woman turned around and gave a small smile. "I actually wouldn't mind being read too. Mama couldn't fit any books in her bag when we left."

Lulu rushed over to Daisy's bookshelf and grabbed whatever would look appealing to the kids. She smiled at everyone seated around and they smiled back.

"What's goin' on?" asked Brandon in the most feminine tone everyone had ever heard.

"They want a story," she said toward Carol and Lori. The two women nodded greatly in relief. It was one less worry for them to have while having the weight of the men not being back yet. Clara patted Carol's knee and gave her a smile.

"Why don't you tell them the story of when you wore those orange clogs to Shawn's christening," Brandon suggested. Clara buried her head in Daisy's shoulder, trying with all her might to muffle her laughter. Daisy wasn't amused with his tease. She wasn't really amused with the shoes she wore that day either, but she laughed it off with time and felt bad for Lulu, who was now flipping Brandon the bird and walking away. Brandon blew her a kiss and Lulu smiled as the man brought over a few throw blankets and pillows for the small group in the corner and had a seat with them.

"Well," said Clara. "Back to this. This place is Martin and Daisy's. They are maxed out on rooms. Jarred and Brandon's house has the biggest basement. We think we should let them be with what space they have because that's we're we keep a good bit of our supplies. Someone is constantly running in and out. I think that would be only fair."

"True story," they heard him say from the corner.

"Did your mother teach you any manners?" she asked him from across the room, trying to contain her smile.

"Did your mother teach you how to dress like an old man? Walter Matthau called. He wants his outfit back," he said back to her. Hershel couldn't help but laugh when he saw Carol holding back from bursting out. Lori bit her lip and Maggie and Beth smiled as they sat and watched the comical commotion go back and forth between Brandon and Clara go back and forth.

"This is in now," she said as she tugged her cardigan. "Lisa Frank on the other hand was in and out in the nineties," she said. Sophia's eyes lit up and she fidgeted under the blanket.

"I like Lisa Frank," she said. Brandon gasped in her direction and ran a hand through her growing blonde hair.

"And I like you, angel," he said. "I've tried to get that color and I realized that they just don't bottle that."

Sophia combed her hair with her fingers and smiled.

"Anyway," Clara said as Lulu began to read softly from the book. "I want us to be close. This is the safest you'll get. Those things seldom come around here. It's happened though. It's far from nirvana. Just got to keep a look out."

She waited for everyone's nod of approval and she continued.

"Alrighty then. The house across the road belonged to old neighbors. They took off when the shit hit the fan. There are two bedrooms. I think Glenn and the Greene's here should take that. Herschel, there is a small barn in the back and it has the most land. Dais' and I thought you'd do well there, being a farmer and a vet and all that jazz. They left behind quite a few chickens and two little pigs. Daisy brought her 'pet' cow over when they left.

"You have a pet cow?" he asked as he looked at Daisy. She shifted in her seat and nodded shamelessly.

"Does that work for you guys?" Clara asked the small family. Maggie smiled and squeezed Beth's hand. Herschel sighed at his daughters with an approaching smile in his face.

"I know Glenn will be grateful, Clara. Thank you," said Maggie. Clara nodded at the young woman and gave Beth a reassuring smile.

"One house down. Okay. Next door to them is the other house. I know it's in good shape. It's smaller so I think T-Dog, Michonne, and Andrea should take it. There's two bedrooms. I trust you three can figure it out?"

T-Dog nodded and Michonne and Andrea glanced at each other and nodded with content on their faces, especially Michonne's. Andrea gently rubbed her knee and kissed her shoulder hastily. Clara caught it and gave them knowing and understanding giggle. Andrea blushed and Michonne cleared her throat.

"Thank you," she said facing Clara and Daisy. She then mouthed her words to Clara again. She smiled.

"Cool beans! Okay. That's settled then," she said. She turned and faced Carol. The woman fidgeted with her hands and Her eyes lit up. "Lulu said that she and Davy have plenty of room and wouldn't mind at all if you, Sophia, and Daryl stayed."

Carol had relieved tears in her eyes as Clara spoke. She wiped them away quickly and Lori rubbed the woman's back and her small belly simultaneously. Daisy saw Clara watch Lori's hand on her belly and and saw her smile dissipate slightly. Clara shook her mind and got back on track.

"I kept a lot of my clothes from when I was Sophia's age," Daisy said to Carol. "They aren't brand new, but they're pretty nice. She is welcome to them."

"Oh my," Carol breathed out and smiled with a nod. "I would appreciate that. She will be so excited."

"That leaves Lori and her family," Clara said looking down at the dry erase board. She pointed out to her and Merle's home. She tapped the marker around the four squares in the doodled house that indicated bedrooms. Lori sucked on the bottom of her lip in wait as Clara thought on.

"I don't want you three spread out. My house has four rooms. It's plenty spacious. I told Merle and Daryl when they built it that it needed lots of space," she quietly said as she reminisced. "I think you guys should stay with us."

"As long as you are comfortable with this then I would sure appreciate it," Lori said with hope in her eyes.

"I am comfy cozy."

"You don't think Merle and Rick will square off?" asked Carol.

"Leave Merle to me. I don't know who he was when he was with you all, but I can assure you he will be a changed man soon enough. Worst comes to worst, we have a pregnant woman and a vocal woman at the reins."

They all looked at Clara with slight confusion expect Daisy, who wiggled as she sipped her coffee. Clara shifted and cleared her throat.

"I sing. I can sing loud. I can go off scales" she drew out. Everyone nodded at what she meant. She shook her head and laughed and stood to collect the plates from the sandwiches they ate earlier. She caught Daisy looking out the window, squinting in the dying sun through the golden leaves and dimming sky.

"Daisy?" asked Clara. Her sisters soft, brown, shoulder length curls danced as she spun her head.

"It's getting dark," she stated. Clara nodded and tilted her head.

"Which means they will be home soon then. Won't they?" she reassured her slightly scared sister, hiding her own fear deep down.

"Right," she answered. Daisy stood and helped her collect the plates. "I'll go and finish up the pot of soup."

"I can help," said Carol, sitting up slightly. Clara smiled and gently put her hand on the woman's shoulder, keeping her down.

"We've got it, sweetie. Really. You've all had such a rough time. Just take a breather."

"I just don't feel right," Carol admitted as she toyed with her necklace. Clara looked over at Daisy, who smiled and took the woman's hand from her necklace and held it tight.

"I don't think it's wise to get settled in tonight. Should start first thing after breakfast in the morning. This way the men can do the heavy lifting," she giggled. "Why not help me gather up all the pillows and blankets around the house? I want you all to stay here tonight."

"You sure, Daisy?" Clara asked. Her sister nodded.

"Yeah. Too much exhaustion for one day. I think we should situate everything tomorrow."

Clara glanced back at her and then to the rest of the people there. They were all tired and worn. Hungry and scared. She looked at her sister and nodded.

"Tomorrow is a better idea. You're right. You and Carol can set things up down here and I'll finish dinner instead."

Daisy and Carol nodded and slowly made their way about their duty. Clara sighed and smiled at Lori, who was getting ready to stand when Clara put her palm up.

"You definitely need rest. Rest and a lot more food. You're far too thin. What did you last eat? Before that sandwich and fruit, I mean."

Lori cringed and bit her lip.

"You don't want to know," she admitted. Clara bit her lip and motioned for Lori to follow her. She carefully stood and and they made their way into the kitchen. They both looked back and they both let out a smile when they saw Hershel, Maggie, and Beth snuggled up together listening to Lulu read JM Barrie's Peter Pan.

She pulled out a chair for Lori and stirred the pot of soup in haste. The smell of the large pot of soup was overwhelming. So much so that Lori pretended to cough to cover the sounds of her stomach rumbling. She watched as Clara went out through the screen door after she grabbed a flashlight from the drawer.

She sat in silence as she listened closely for any danger. The wind brought a clean, brisk, cool smell to her senses and she shivered as it whistled through the door. She wrapped her arms around herself at the thought of the approaching winter. Soon she heard the rustling of Clara's footsteps nearing. Opening the door, her host had satisfaction in her eyes and a smile...and some dirt...on her face.

Clara was cradling a glass pint of milk.

Lori's eyes lit up as she rubbed her belly. Clara pulled a large glass from Daisy's cupboard and poured until the milk reached the top.

"Drink up. You need this," Clara said as she slid the glass to Lori, careful not to spill. The women locked eyes and Lori took a breath and nodded. She drank greedily and stopped to take a breath. Clara laughed at the milk mustache that formed and Lori continued to drink.

"I should give the rest to Carl and Sophia."

"No. You need that. There is plenty more. Please finish it," Clara asked. Lori hesitantly nodded and continued to sip at the creamy milk. Clara began to get out bowls and spoons.

"Can I help?" asked Lori. "I know you said no, but I don't feel right either."

Clara laughed and handed her a knife and then went to the bread box and retrieved a loaf of bread. Lori watched on in amazement as she began to slice.

"How did you all manage this? Milk and bread?"

"There's yogurt out there and I have some cheese aging at my place," Clara answered matter of factly. She laughed when she saw Lori's jaw drop in confusion. "It's not hard to do. My grandfather was a cheese maker. Dairy is in my blood. My father owned a bar. I have beer in my blood too, but I can show you that after the baby comes," she smiled.

She bowled the soup up one by one. The smell filled the kitchen. The chicken created a rich broth that was accompanied by celery, carrots, and rice. Clara was sad to see one of the young chickens go, but the men were always gentle and humane when they had to kill some.

Clara had gathered everyone into the kitchen. Relief washed over everyone's face when they inhaled the comforting smell that the soup brought to them.

"That smells amazing," whispered Beth to Carol. The woman smiled at the young girl.

"Please sit, you guys," said Daisy. They obliged and found places at the table in no time. "Hershel?"

"Yes dear?" the older man responded.

"You look 'experienced'. Would you mind saying Grace?" she shyly asked. Clara looked on hopefully, but the silence was cut by Brandon, who let out a giggle. Daisy rolled her eyes at him. "What is so funny, Brand?"

"Nothing like calling a person old," he mumbled. Her caramel toned cheeks blushed and her jaw hung in slight embarrassment. Hershel just smiled at her.

"Well I am both of those things, son," he said to Brandon. "I would be glad to."

Everyone bowed their heads and folder their hands in their laps. The older southern mans voice cut through the air and filled everyone's senses.

"Lord. For food in a world where many walk in hunger. For faith in a world where many walk in fear. For friends in a world where many walk alone. We give you thanks. O Lord. Tonight, no hunger. Tonight, no fear. Tonight, we are not alone. Amen."

They sat in silence, the words sinking in. Maggie rubbed her father's knee and kissed his cheek.

"That was beautiful, Dad."

"Very beautiful," said Andrea.

"It really was," added Clara. "Thank you."

The meal was the most the group had eaten in a while. Daisy and Clara made sure there would be enough for seconds and had set off bowls and plenty of bread for the men when they returned.

In the meantime, they relished in peace while they ate.

"You know, Lu?" asked Brandon. The thin redhead looked up. "I would really love to know what thoughts crossed your head when you slipped into those orange clogs."

Brandon caught the piece of crust in his mouth that she threw at him and the whole table laughed.

"Really," added Daisy. "I would love to know as well."

It was the first time they felt safe in a long while.

T-Dog cocked his gun when he heard the rustled footsteps coming from the side of the house. He silently walked to the ledge and saw that it was the men returning back. The lump in his chest was lifted and he let out a light whistle. It got Rick's attention and the worn man looked up and nodded. T-Dog climbed down the side of the house and went to the men.

"You all were scarin' the shit out of me. Good to see your faces," he said as he patted Rick's back.

"Sorry about the timing," said Martin. "We pulled off for a bit to check on the engine. How is everyone?" he asked. T-Dog laughed and pointed to the house with his thumb.

"It's like one big camp out in there. The kids even made a fort."

The sound of Carl having made a fort warmed Rick immensely. A small smile spread across his face.

"They're asleep?" he asked his friend.

"Safe and sound. They've been out for about two hours."

"Thank you for taking watch," said Merle as he lifted a few bags and carried a box, it leaning on his torso. "Oh Dog, this 'ere is Davy and Jarred."

The two men stepped in front of Merle and shook T-Dog's hand.

"Good to meet ya," said Davy. "Met Lulu? I'm her husband."

"Brandon's mine," Jarred said. T-Dog's brows went up and he nodded with a chuckle.

"Cool man. Cool. I'm Theodore, but everyone calls me T-Dog. It's good to meet y'all too."

The men left most of the goods in the vehicles for the night, too exhausted to gather every single bundle. T-Dog insisted he stay up and watch and he made his way back up to the ledge. Martin led them all inside. The lingering smell of dinner still filled the kitchen. It nearly made Rick collapse right there. There were bowls set aside and Martin started divvying the soup that was stored in a rather large thermos. Daryl sniffed it and sighed.

"This Daisy's doin'?"

"You know it. Clara baked the bread, I think."

Merle's ears perked up and the sound of Clara's bread. It was one of his favorite things she baked. He went to it immediately and started plating out pieces for everyone.

The meal was extremely relieving. They all felt the hot soup warm and comfort their souls. Rick savored every bite. Glenn slurped his like an innocent child, making them all laugh. Merle bit into Clara's bread. He thought he would faint. Words couldn't describe how delicious it was with Daisy's soup, for which he almost jumped for joy over when Martin confirmed it was hers.

When everyone finished their meals they placed the bowls into the sink and followed Martin into the living room. They almost lost it with laughter when they saw everyone. Blankets were strewn across the floor. Pillows were everywhere. Rick smiled from ear to ear when he saw the fort that the kids build.

The kids.

They were kids tonight.

Martin and Rick went to inspect the fort. What they saw when they lifted the blanket was priceless. In their sleeping bags laid Sophia, Shawn, and Carl.

"Its like a backwards Oreo," said Martin. Rick shook his head and hoarsely laughed, to not wake anyone. Daryl tiptoed over to Carol, who was sleeping soundly on piled up blankets. She had a look of relief on her face. A look he hadn't seen ever before. It made his smile and warmed him. He quietly kicked off his boots and placed his crossbow up against the wall. He carefully wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled his face in her neck and found her rhythm.

Jarred went over to Brandon and laid beside him. He placed a kiss behind his ear then his shoulder.

Davy found a place on the floor next to the recliner that Lulu had fallen asleep in, but kissed her head before doing so.

Glenn had judged whether or not he should lay next to Maggie, as she was cuddled up with Hershel and Beth. He sighed and laid down at her he got comfortable, he felt her foot plop down right on his chest, knocking the wind out of him. She gently rubbed it on his chest and he smiled, bringing his hand up to it and caressed it gently.

Rick looked to the the other side of the room and saw Lori sleeping peacefully on the pull out, her hand draping her small bump. It killed him a little to know that it was Shane's baby in there. He knew it was. It had to be. He also knew that it cold never be. That was something Lori had been right about. This would be Rick's child. He knew once it arrived, his worries would melt. Until then however, he would live with the rock in his gut. He sighed and looked back to Martin.

"Daisy is upstairs. I will see you in the morning," said Martin.

"We will earn our keep. That I promise you," said Rick. Martin smiled and patted the sheriff's shoulder.

"It will be okay. We all earn our keep. Get some sleep," he said and he went off.

Rick made his way over to Lori. He took her in and rubbed his eyes. After he took off his shoes, he carefully slid in next to her and placed his hand gently on her belly.

"I think we'll all be alright for now, Bubba," he said to his unborn baby before closing his eyes. Lori was careful not to let him know she was awake. She let a tear fall at it words and found sleep.

Meanwhile, Merle had gone into the den. It was where they both would stay if ever they had stayed at Martin and Daisy's. Sure enough. She was there.

Clara had taken to the couch. He watched her breast rise and fall with each breath. Her bangs draped across her eyes and Oliver Twist lay on her stomach. He stood there for what seemed like forever and he was content. She looked so peaceful in her sleep. He wanted badly to wake her, but he went against it. Rather, he sighed and rubbed his head.

He walked carefully over to her and gently removed the book. He looked at her face and lightly brushed the hair from her eyes. Kneeling, he took her hand in his and kissed it, letting her warmth heat his lips.

He sat down on the floor and lay his head on her stomach, never once letting go of her hand.

Once sleep found him, Clara brought her other hand up and gently ran her fingers through his curls. She entwined her fingers on her other hand with his and squeezed.

"You're really here, aren't you, Dixon?" she whispered with a smile and found sleep once more.


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note - You guys are so lovely with your reviews! I appreciate every single one. Thank you also to all my new followers and favorites. I hope you all keep up with me. I will try to make it worth your while.

I hope you all have picked up on my way of writing the flashbacks. Most are not in order. They go all over the place. It started as an accident, but I ended up loving the style, so if there are any questions about them now or in the future, please feel free to ask.

I also plan on making a soundtrack and including links to the songs that I use in this story. There will be a lot more. Clara is a singer after all. Makes sense.

So here is Chapter 10. It's a wee bit short, but as always, please love and review.

Hugs and High Fives.

Kadie

The bar was quiet for a Friday night. People were leaving with smiles on their face and that was enough for Merle to call it a good night. He had to break up more than enough fights this past week. So as the night went on and no one went on scathed, he was relieved. Not that he minded the rowdiness. He was just tired.

Tired of the bar fights and very tired of the way Jarred had been sweeping Clara off her feet. Every night this week it was something. Flowers on Monday. Dinner on Tuesday. Her favorite candy on Wednesday. A movie on Thursday. He cringed as he thought about what tonight would have brought, but he thanked his stars that she was working with him tonight.

"Have ya put out yet?" he asked Clara as he took a swig of his beer before turning up some stools. She looked up at him and shook her head with amazement.

"No as a matter of fact. I have not 'put out' yet," she said as she cleared away some coasters. Merle nodded silently.

"Good. He looks like he's been around the block a few times."

"This coming from the man who slept with Jasmine McReady? She's still the towns doorknob. Everyone who comes through has a good turn," she said defensively. Merle shrugged.

"We were in school yet. Got t' her 'fore most oth'r guys did."

"Yeah well," she said and ignored the subject. They worked in silence for awhile. She cleaned the bar up we he swept the floor. He tried not to feel guilty about being a jerk. He had to. It was hurting him on the inside. Every time Jarred was in sight, Merle's skin would crawl. It had been crawling since their last year of high school. Not that the man was bad. Far from it. In fact he was a good man, but the fact that he had Clara on his arm was enough to send Merle to the looney bin. It broke him, but he knew she would never fall for the likes of him. They were friends. Best friends. Merle was in the friend zone.

It had been near fifteen minutes and not a word was spoken. It tested Clara's patience and she whipped the wet rag down on the counter and huffed away toward her piano. He watched her. Even mad she was beautiful. He wanted to tell her at just to make her laugh, but he knew she wouldn't take him seriously. Not like that.

She slid on to her bench and studied the keys for a few moments. She let her fingers dance around on the until she found her rhythm.

"Give me a song, Dixon," she said above the music. Merle smiled as he leaned against the broom and watched her from behind. He rubbed his head and put the broom against the wall and walked over to her, taking a seat beside her on the bench.

"I can't think of one off hand," he said. She rolled her eyes and continued to play.

"Jesus Christ come on," she sighed. He scratched his ear and tilted his head.

"Play me that one you always singin' to people when they're sad."

"That is a lot to choose from," she said as she continued dancing on her piano.

"Y' know the one. Where ya up on the roof and there's room 'nough f' two?"

"Ohh," she drew out breathlessly, so much so that it took everything Merle had to not kiss her.

She let her fingers dance as she remembered what keys to play as she cleared her throat softly. He watched her like he was watching an angel fly. Clara began at her own soft pace. She was saying rather than singing. Her fingers pranced and her head swayed. Merle relaxed as he got more comfortable.

_"When this old world starts getting me down_

_and people are just too much for me to face._

_I climb way up to the top of the stairs_

_and all my cares just drift right into space._

_On the roof, it's peaceful as can be._

_And there the world below can't bother me."_

Clara looked up at Merle and gave him a smile as he nudged her.

_"Let me tell you now._

_When I come home feelin' tired and beat,_

_I go up where the air is fresh and sweet,_

_up on the roof._

_I get away from the hustling crowd_

_and all that rat-race noise down in the street,_

_up on the roof._

_On the roof, the only place I know._

_Where you just have to wish to make it so._

_Let's go up on the roof."_

Clara rested her head on Merle's upper arm as she played. She then took his hand and placed it up near her prancing one. The music slowed even more so as she was playing single handedly.

"Here. Tap these while I chime in over here," she said.

"I don' know what t' hell I'm doin'," he whined with a laugh. She smiled and he obliged regardless, trying not to mess anything up, but when he wold go off key, she would laugh and go on key anyway. Her soft voice continued.

_"At night the stars put on a show for free_

_and darling you can share it all with me._

_I keep on tellin' you that_

_right smack dab in the middle of town,_

_I've found a paradise that's trouble proof upon the roof._

_And if this world starts getting you down,_

_there's room enough for two_

_up on the roof._

_Up on the roo-oo-oof._

_Oh, come on, baby._

_Oh, come on, honey."_

She looked at Merle, who had stopped playing whatever it was he was playing and was gazing at her. He chuckled to break the thick, but comfortable tension that was between them and she sang the very last part, which reassured him silently.

_"Everything's a' alright."_

They were silent for a little while as they sat there, side my side. She put her head on his arm again and closed her eyes. He wanted her to be happy. Very happy. He knew he would never be able to do it like that. If keeping her as his best friend meant that he would always be near her, to make her as happy as 'he could' in that sense, then he would take it. Just as he was about to speak, she cut him off with her own words.

"We aren't seeing each other anymore," she whispered in a content voice. Merle froze and she felt it. It made her giggle on the inside.

"What? But you were actin' like all was fine n' dandy. Wha' happen'd?" he asked as a large relief had been lifted off of his shoulders. He wouldn't say so. He didn't want to upset her as much as he was happy about this. Clara shrugged and lifted her head and looked up at his.

"I may be wrong, but I am pretty sure he is gay," she said. She felt Merle's laugh. His vibrations were out of control. She herself started giggling, burying her face into his arm. She sighed again and straightened up and sat up. He stood and pushed the bench under the piano and tried to hide the skip in his step. Clara put the broom away and Merle shut off the lights.

"Walk me home, Dixon?" she asked.

"I'll do ya one better," he said as he reached for his motorcycle helmet under the bar and handed it to her. She smiled and put in on. Merle walked around and shoved her head slightly in a playful manner and got the door.

As Merle locked up and saw her waiting for him on his bike, he realized that they would always be buddies no matter what, but the exit door to the friend zone was just opened and he knew that it would take awhile, but he would try his damnedest to sneak out while he had the chance.

With that he walked over to her, crushing the words that he thought of before as he hopped on his bike.

He would make her happy.

A/N - Did you see what I did there?


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note - I am so sorry about this long delay. My sister borrowed my iPad and we live a river apart, but i got it back. This is a bit shorter than I wanted, but I have so much more planned for this story for the holidays! You won't be disappointed. I promise. A kind shout out to SOA loving mom, Jaded79, MarionArnold, and kathleensmiles. Your kind words keep me going. They're like my drug, but that's ironic. Haha. I am so glad you are all enjoying it. To all my new followers, I hope you enjoy it!

As always, reviews are adrenaline.

Hugs and High Fives,

Kadie.

Merle woke to the warming sensation that the thick quilt brought on to him and the smell of coffee in the air. He arched his back and felt his muscles stretch as a loud and gravely yawn escaped his throat. He buried his feet deeper into the blanket when he shot his eyes open in realization of where he was.

_Shit._

_She must've hauled my sorry ass up 'ere._

He slowly pushed the blanket off and swung his legs over to the floor. He steadied himself as he stood and took in the familiar surroundings and remembered the day before. He pinched the bridge of his nose and tidied up the couch, draping the quilt over the head of it. Looking out the window, the sun was still at least an hour away from coming up.

"You look frazzled," came a soft voice from behind him. He swung around and was greeted by Daisy, who stood still in the slowly rising sun. In her hand was a mug of what Merle knew was coffee.

"A little I am, yeah," he said softly. She smiled and handed him the mug.

"Looks like you could use this," she said as she handed him the mug. He nodded his thanks and relished the familiar hot liquid as it warmed his hand and throat. He set it down and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.

"Where did Clara go?" he asked as he tried to peer into the other room. Daisy yawned and motioned toward the direction his house.

"She went off to feed the cat. She should be back in a few," she clarified. Merle nodded and shuffled his feet. He loved Daisy like a sister and knew most of her actions and movements. He saw her bite her lip and run her hand through her curly, bobbed, brown locks and he knew that something was up.

"Wha' is it Dais?" he asked with a knowing grin. Daisy ran to him and hugged him tight as a few tears fell. He hesitantly hugged her back and gave her shoulder a brotherly rub.

"I'm just so relieved you and Daryl are okay," she quietly sobbed. "I'm just getting this out of my system for what I'm about to do."

Merle stilled as she took a small step back and watched her fist flex quickly. He had seen her fight so he knew what he was in store for.

What he hadn't taken into account was Martin teaching her a thing or two about throwing a punch.

With a grace like her sister's, Daisy brought her fist up and swung at Merle's jaw. The sound was rewarding to her ears. She smiled inwardly as he staggered backwards and groaned as he brought his hand up to his face. She took another step after him and swung again. This time only catching his left eye and causing the coffee to tip over and pour to the floor when he bumped into the table. He groaned again as he stumbled back on to the couch, cradling his head. Daisy huffed over to him and twisted her hand into his tee shirt and got close to his face.

"What is your problem? Are you mental?"

"Jesus Christ!" he hissed. Daisy slapped him hard on the face.

"This is between you and me right now. You leave him out of this," she spoke calmly.

"Dais' what the hell?" he asked.

"You 'what the hell'. Have you any idea what you put her through? What you put us and Daryl through?" she growled through her grit teeth. Her adrenaline got the better of her and she began to slap him wherever she could. "She went insane because of you! She has been blaming herself for everything! The cancer. Your accident. Your stupid, selfish, fucking addiction! You were supposed to be addicted to her! Not drugs!" she drew out as she took hold of his shirt and raised her fist at him.

"I'm tryin' to make things right," he said firmly. "I fucked up Daisy. I fucked up real bad-like. Reckon ya think I don' know that?" he said calmly. She squinted her eyes and loosened her hold.

"I know you know it. I see the scared little boy in your eyes and I think he should stay there for a while to learn his lesson. Its morbidly relieving," she said as she let him go. He looked up at her incredulously. "I love you, Merle. You've been a brother to me for a very long time and I am so happy you and Daryl found us again. But you do have a lot to make right. In more ways than one."

Merle nodded slowly, eyes cast on the floor. Her eyes softened on him as he looked up, biting his lip.

"She'll be back in a minute. Want another coffee?" she asked.

"That'd be nice," he said as he rubbed his face and looked at her with sarcasm. Daisy stepped forward and slapped him on the back of the head.

"You know where it is," she sang as she walked away with the same grace as before. Merle sat shocked from confusion and mostly the pain that was swimming around his head. He slowly shook his head and stood up.

"Damn," he mumbled as he set to the kitchen.

He stalked quietly past the living room with a slight sense of relief to see everyone still sound asleep. Carol was nestled in blankets with Daryl nowhere to be seen. When he got to the kitchen, he saw him and Daisy talking. Daryl snorted when he saw Merle and his slightly swollen eye. Daisy bit her lip and sipped some coffee. Embarrassment and anger took over Merle and he pointed to his eye.

"Ya little shit. Not a word, ya hear?"

Daryl waved in a knowing manner and drank some of his coffee as Merle poured a new cup.

"They're all sleepin' so well. I don't want to wake them," said Daryl. Merle nodded and rubbed his eye.

"Let the ladies sleep. Wake Rick and the rest," he said. Daryl nodded and yawned and Daisy looked on at the two, still adoring their presence.

"Good idea," said a familiar voice. They all turned their heads and saw Clara. She looked fresh and donned a new set of clothes. Her hair still slightly wet, she fluffed it with her fingers and brushed it to the side. Merle felt his whole body go to jelly at the sight of her and resorted to leaning on the counter nonchalantly. She smiled warmly at all of them and set herself down at the nook near the wall.

"By the looks of those bags under Lori's eyes, I'd say she hasn't had a proper sleep in weeks. It's too unhealthy for her. For everyone," said Clara as she stripped off her leather bomber. Daisy nodded as she poured her sister some coffee.

"When should we start moving people around?" asked Daisy. Merle gazed at Clara, waiting for her answer. Daryl bit his fingernail and upon seeing that, Daisy slapped his hand down from his mouth.

"There's really not much stuff t' move around. Won't take long at all," said Merle. Clara smiled warmly and nodded. Daisy saw the end changed look between the two and grabbed Daryl's sleeve, pulling him along and out of the room.

Clara bit her lip and smiled as they left and looked back up at her husband. Merle watched as her plump bottom lip was released from her teeth. He swallowed hard and shuffled his feet. It was only when she scooted over and patted the spot next to her did he take a seat beside her.

His scent was like her own personal little high. It always had been. She was never able to put her finger on it, but she kind of wanted to keep it a mystery to herself. As he sat down, she breathed him in and silently sighed.

"Good morning," she said softly. He smiled just enough to show a glimpse of his teeth.

"Mornin'," he said in the same tone. He wanted nothing more than to kiss her. He felt his body ache. She smiled warmly at him as she swirled her mug.

"Sleep good?"

"Haven't slept that good in quite a while," he said with a nod. She smiled and sipped at her mug. "Thanks for t'at, by the way. Puttin' me on th' couch."

Clara blushed and nodded with a smile.

"It was nothing. I had gotten up and you had a crick in your neck," she said. "You also still talk in your sleep," she whispered behind her mug. Merle swallowed and turned red, fearing the words he spoke in his sleep the worst. She chuckled and rubbed his knee.

"Christ. What'd I say?"

"You asked me to play 'Some dang Willie Nelson 'er somethin'. Anythang but that Liberace guy.'," she drew out in her best southern drawl. Merle laughed and rubbed the top of his head.

"Ya know, I do recall tha' somewhere in m' dream."

Silence took over them as they listened to the morning begin. The shuffling around the house. The yawns. The whispers. The sun slowly began to come up through the trees, but both Merle and Clara knew it wouldn't stay out long. There were many clouds in the sky and light rumbling in the distance.

She let her eyes wander slowly over to him again. This time really taking in the changed man before her. His shirt was tight against his muscles. His skin was slightly wrinkled with age. His eyes were older and tired with stories behind them, but still that icy blue hue that swept her off her feet. His smile was still the same one she fell in love with. A grin that stretched from here to Kingdom Come. His blonde hair was slightly graying. He was still so beautiful.

She blushed and looked away when she saw that he had been looking at her as well. His cheeks couldn't help but get pink.

Her hair was still that of a pixie. Dirty blonde locks wishing in front of her eyes which were still like emeralds. Her perfect mouth with flesh toned lips always just asking to be kissed. She still had her voluptuous figure which drove him crazy. Her skin still smelled of flowers he had picked for her when they had first started dating.

"We look so haggard," she said with a smile as she rested her head in her palm. Her scoffed and looked at her, nodding against her words. She saw him smile slightly and he raised his hand to her, brushing her bangs from her eyes.

"Jus' one of us, Sugar," he whispered. She felt her body heat up and she bit her lip with a jolt of shyness. Sighing, he finished his coffee and went to stand up, but was stopped by the heat from Clara's hand on his shoulder.

"Hey," she asked.

"Hey?" he responded.

She took a breath to steady her schoolgirl-like nerves and stood to meet him. She locked her gaze with his and his blood stilled in excitement.

She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to taste his lips. She felt the urge like she had on the night they first locked lips. Her mouth quivered in excitement. Her breathing became rapid. She almost had tears in her eyes.

She grabbed Merle's head and placed and firm kiss on his forehead.

He was nervous. He felt like he did when he was a teenager around her. He wanted her lips on his.

The moisture from her lips against his skin was relieving. He knew better than to get anymore than that at this point. He didn't deserve that from her, but was so happy she gave him this.

With hesitation, he reached both arms around her waist and pulled her close, allowing himself to rest his head on her chest. Her hold on him became a hug around his head.

She sniffled as she ran her fingers through his hair, trying to keep from crying. He knew better and lifted his head to wipe her tears from her cheeks. She turned away, but he kept her face in his view.

"Don't cry, babe. Please?" he whispered.

"I can't help it," she said with a quieter whisper and a smile.

"I can help it."

"I know you will, Dixon," she said. With a last kiss to his forehead, she reached for his hand and pulled him up. She smiled at him when they heard the comforting sounds of everyone waking up. Daisy and Carol came in and gave them a smile.

"Good morning, Clara," said Carol, who was eager to work in the kitchen.

"Good morning," she said back. Daisy smiled at the exchange and began showing Carol where things were.

"Take it we got stuff to do today?" Merle said as they walked into the living room. She slipped her arm around his and patted it gently.

"I take it you and the other muscles around here have stuff to do today," she said back to him, reaching into her pocket and handing him the list she made the night before of the living arrangement.

He smiled as he looked at the paper.

He missed their house.


	12. Chapter 12

Author's Note - So I still feel like apologizing about the delay in updates earlier. I shall try to be more consistent. I have a lot of plans for this as Christmas approaches. Some gooey stuff. Some action. Some smut. The works. But hey, slow and steady wins the race, right?

Hugs and High Fives.

The day had been eventful to say the least. The organizing. The cleaning. The securing. The running back and forth. Tiring was perhaps a better term. Clara, who was all smiles and full of eager energy to make new homes for everyone was even glad that they had finished.

Merle, however, had been ignoring the fact that he and Rick would be living under the same roof. He respected the man, but rarely got along with him. He didn't mention his thoughts to anyone, but Clara had seen the way he had been acting all day and then at dinner at Daisy and Martin's when sleeping arrangements were being discussed. Then there was the way he avoided Rick at all costs. She wanted to approach him about it before any plan was final, but was too tired to do so.

Merle dropped the last bit of his small amount of belongings on the floor next to the door of his and Clara's home when it hit him. The smell of cinnamon and oak wafted through his senses. He almost had to steady himself from the overwhelming sensation he had.

He sighed when he looked up from the floor.

_It's all the same._

She hadn't changed much of anything. Candles and nick-nacs to the quilts on the couch. Her records were still in the same area. The jukebox in the corner of the living room was still next to her piano. Pictures all over the place. Carlin walking delicately around him, dancing through his feet.

_Carlin._

A huge grin spread across Merle's face as he reached down and picked up the dark gray cat. He looked into those golden eyes and laughed as he burrowed his face into the cat's fur.

"Hey buddy. Hey. Wha's goin' on? How ya been?" he whispered softly as he rubbed Carlin's head. The feline purred into Merle's touch and his ears quickly perked as he turned his head toward a noise near the door. Merle turned his head to find Clara wrapping her cardigan tightly around her. A smile spread across her face.

"He missed you,' she said. Merle nodded with acknowledgment as he set the cat down. They both watched him investigate the few bags on the ground and walk away once he was satisfied. He heard Clara sigh and step into the house, closing the door behind her.

"I know you aren't happy about the Grimes staying here," she said in defeat.

"Who said I wasn't happy?" he asked.

"Well I saw your face when you found out. You need to work on your subtlety. Never was one for hiding your emotions," she said with a small grin forming on her mouth. He wanted to kiss that grin.

" I'll play nice," he said gruffly. She raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. "I swear I will."

"You've better," she said. They stood in silence for a little bit as he looked around in the foyer. "Want to tell me about your hand?" she asked bluntly. He knew he had to get to it sooner or later, but her asking had taken him by surprise after such a long day.

"Really wanna hear it?" he asked ashamedly. She nodded slowly as she took him by his arm and guided him into their living room. He felt his heart thud. He felt the sweat begin to build. The fear of her anger. Once they found a seat on the couch, she got comfortable and draped his stump across her lap.

She studied it. She felt it's bumpy, scarred skin. Her fingers grazed the discolored flesh. It was not a pretty sight, but at least it looked healed. Clara felt his shuddered breaths.

"It hurts still?" she whispered.

"Not really. It gets sore sometimes. Nothin' I can't handle. Nothin' I don't deserve."

"Tell me what led to this," she said as she began massaging his stump with her fingers. It took him by surprise and to his own surprise, it felt amazing. She looked peaceful and needed as she worked.

"Me, Andrea, T, Glenn, and a few others had gone on a run into Atlanta," he started. "I was flying high. Don't know why they took me. I was up on the roof takin' down the walkers. Shootin' like a dumbass. I wasn't playin' nice an' Rick cuffed me up to a pipe there. Won't say I didn't deserve it. He threw my stuff off the roof," he drew out with relief. "T was keepin' an eye on me when it all became a blur. They needed to get out. A hoard got in," he said as his voice tightened. "The key. The key fell down the drain. It fell down the drain and he left. T left. He 'ad to. I would've if I was in his shoes, dealin' the likes o' me," he said as tears filled his eyes with the memory. He took a second to collect himself and he continued. "Those things were breaking down the door. I had to do it."

He hadn't noticed that she stopped massaging his stump until he felt splashes drop onto it. When he looked up at her, she was staring off with tears strolling down her cheeks.

"What did you use to do it?" she hesitantly asked, barely above a whisper. Merle pinched the bridge of his noise and let out a hard breath.

"I, I used a handsaw," he stuttered.

Clara let out a disturbed moan and brought her head down onto her lap as she held his arm.

"I found a van when I got down," he said. Turned out to be the one the guys had used to come back for me. I found them and I don't remember much after that. I was starting to come down from it all."

They sat in silence for what seemed like hours. She sat up, still holding his scarred stump, rubbing her fingers softly against it. He watched her lips pout, as if she were about to kiss his it. She bit her bottom lip and brought her eyes up to his.

"I'm sorry you went through that."

"I'm sorry that I deserved it," he said back. She gave him a sad smile with a glimmer in her eye.

_There he is._

She took in a deep breath and stroked his scarred wrist. They were disrupted by a knock at the door. Clara squeezed his stump gently and stood to get it, wiping her face in the process. He saw her smile at Carl, who was standing with his two bags, looking tired and disheveled.

"Hey sweetie. Come on in," she said warmly as she could. She could only imagine how awkward this must be for the boy.

"Hey Clara," he said. Slowly, he stepped in and took in his surroundings. She saw a smile creep on his face when he heard Carlin's meowing at his feet. He immediately dropped to the floor to give him a scratch behind the ears. He stood as he heard Rick and Lori, who smiled at the scene in front of them.

"Hey," Clara said just as warmly and welcoming to Rick and Lori. Lori bit her lip and smiled, wringing her hands tightly around her belly. Merle stood as Carl entered the room with Carlin in his hold. They nodded at each other and Carl slowly took a seat on the floor. Merle had seen that boy be such a man that it was weird to see him take slight comfort so something as typical as a cat.

"Merle?" asked a rough voice. He looked up and found Rick standing feet away from him. Clara and Lori's voices were distant in the house as he steadied his mind and prepared for whatever it was that Rick was about to bring up.

"Yeah?" he answered. They both were to tired for anything petty. Rick took a deep breath and started.

"Thank you for this," he whispered hoarsely. "For whatever it is and for however long. Just thank you."

"Yeah," Merle drew out as he scratched his head. Rick shoved his hands in his pockets and grinned down at Carl, who put his gun on the side of him and was playing with Carlin.

"T is checking around the perimeter with Daryl and Jarred. I want to do watches for a couple of days. To be on the safe side of things," said Rick. Merle nodded.

"I'll take tonight," Merle said as he stood. "Ya still look like shit."

"You're just as handsome. Thanks."

The silence between the two became thick and far to awkward for Carl's liking. The young man stood and follow the voices of Clara and his mother, leaving the always at odds men alone. Rick played with his pockets and started to walk away. Merle sighed and rolled his eyes while biting down on his tongue.

"Officer Friendly?" Merle called out. Rick sighed and turned around, ready for some kind of confrontation.

"Yeah?" he answered and waited for Merle's response. He watched the man who had once been an enemy's eyes become something he had never seen in him before. Something more human. Something more compassionate. Something unreal.

"T'anks," he said as he licked his lips. He stood tall in front of the man who had lead them this far. Rick stood tall in front of one of the men who had pushed him on. "I wouldn't be 'ere 'f not for you an' Daryl."

Rick took his hands out of his pockets and nodded.

They had their understanding.

"Let me show ya around," he said gruffly and he stepped in front of Rick, who quietly sighed in relief as he started behind Merle.

Meanwhile, Clara and Lori were setting up in the bedroom that Clara had set off for the Grimes. It looked as though it had remained untouched. A simple bed with white sheets and a thick gray blanket. Faded gray curtains and walls a deep shade of red. Pictures littered the walls in a fashionable manner just like Lori had seen downstairs.

Daisy, Martin, and Shawn.

Daryl and Daisy.

Daryl holding Shawn on the day of his birth.

Merle and Clara holding Shawn.

Davy and Lulu's wedding day.

Clara kissing Daryl's temple with Daryl giving a rather grossed out look.

The whole group of them sitting down at a bar, smiling with twisted arms, feeding each other beer.

Clara playing her piano.

Posters of Liberace, Jerry Lee Lewis, Buddy Holly, and a few others.

Lori looked around as though it were a museum. She still couldn't believe that those men in the photos were Merle and Daryl.

_How time can change some people._

"Have you got any pictures?" asked Clara, breaking Lori out of her trance. She rubbed her belly and smiled.

"I do. When all this happened they were the first thing I took. I lost a few along the way, but I still have a lot of them."

"You're welcome to put them up and out. Looking at old pictures brings me out of whatever funk I find myself in," she said as she looked at the picture of she and Merle cradling a baby Shawn. Smiling, she straightened the frame and went back to fixing the last touches of their bedroom.

"Do you and Merle have any children?" asked Lori in a hesitant tone. Clara stilled and and turned her head. She gave Lori a weak smile and shook her head.

"No," she said just as weakly as her smile. A pang of guilt soared through Lori and she stumbled with her words.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be nosy."

"No, Lori. Its fine," she said, taking Lori's hand in hers and giving a gentle squeeze. "It just never happened. Then Merle got into an accident. Then, oh I don't know. Time?" she laughed sadly. Lori squeezed her hand. She looked back at the photos and pointed to the on of Clara at her piano, smiling broadly.

"Is that what you meant when you said that you're very vocal?" Clara looked back up and the wall and let out a laugh.

"That was a fun night," she said. She gently released Lori's hand and brushed her finger along the edge of the frame. "I played four hours straight. They wouldn't let me go. I wish I had never stopped," she drew out.

Heavy footsteps made both women turn their heads. Standing in the doorway was Rick, who looked at Lori's belly with tired eyes, giving a relieved smile. Behind him, Merle stood tall and nervous. Clara smiled warmly at them both and looked back at Lori, who was fixed on Rick.

"I'll send Carl up. We'll fix up his room first thing tomorrow," she whispered. Lori nodded with welled up tears in her eyes.

"Thank you," she said softly, almost soundless. Clara nodded and smiled and began her way out when Rick took her hand at his side.

"Thank you," he whispered. "I don't know what else to say."

"Get some sleep," she smiled. Looking at Merle, she nodded and made her way out, shutting the door slightly and leaving them in a minutes peace.

Rick took Lori into his hold, rubbing her shoulders gently and draped his other hand on her belly.

"This might be it," he said hoarsely.

"What if they all change their mind, Rick?" she sobbed. He ran his fingers through her hair and patted her head.

"They won't," he whispered. "We will earn our keep. We will do whatever we can."

When Clara and Merle got downstairs, they saw Carl, still on the ground with Carlin, scratching behind the feline's ears and patting his fur. He looked up and stilled when he saw Clara and Merle.

"His name is Carlin," said Clara, smiling down at him.

"Carlin?" asked Carl with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah," she said as she took a seat on the floor next to him, leaving Merle standing alone watching over them. "Named after a comedian my parents listened to."

"Oh," he nodded. Clara ruffled his hair gently.

"Why don't you head on upstairs. Your parents are waiting for you." Carl nodded and grabbed his gun, but Clara quickly put her hand over his. "That stays down here," she said.

"What if we get overrun in the night?"

"We won't" she said curtly.

"I've heard that before," he said sternly. Clara looked him deep in the eye and bit her lip. She looked up at Merle, his eyebrows scrunched together in sad acknowledgment. She looked back down at the gun and brought it to her, fighting his resistance. She examined it and clicked on the safety, handing it back to him. He took it and tucked it in his pants.

"Sleep well, honey. Okay?" she said softly. Carl nodded and for a moment she thought she saw a smile. She watched him stand and walk past Merle, who was fixated on her. When they heard the door shut upstairs, she let out a breath she was holding.

"Ya alright?" asked Merle as he gave out his arm to help her stand. She took it and he hoisted her up.

"He is pretty attached to that thing, it seems. Is he a good shot at least?" she asked. Merle nodded.

"Saved my ass a few times. I'd say so."

"Well as long as he isn't playing with it."

"We're far beyond tha' point, Clara," he said. She ran her fingers through her hair and held her shoulder, looking at him. She let out a small yawn and tilted her neck, stretching and exposing her bare skin to Merle. His mouth parted slightly to catch bigger breaths as he watched her

"Well its pretty late," she started. "Do you, umm, do you want to head up to bed?" she asked, barely above a whisper. Merle swallowed hard and cleared his throat.

"I, uh, I would but I got watch," he said. "I'll crash on the couch when I get done."

"Merle," she started. "We haven't had a problem in weeks."

"Not the walkers I'm worried 'bout," he said. He watched some color drain from her face and he could only assume she was thinking about what Martin had told him just the day before.

"Please?" she whispered. Merle thought she was about to cry and he immediately gave in.

"Alright," he said softly. Relief showered her face and she took him by his scarred wrist and slowly, they made their way upstairs.

He felt his heart thump. His hands were getting sweaty. He shook. He swallowed hard.

When they got to their bedroom door, Merle placed his hand on the frame and watched her open it.

It was just like he remembered it. Beige walls with photos all over. Gray curtains. Navy blue bedding. He remembered the argument they had when choosing colors for it and it brought a smile to his face.

I'm glad I let her pick everything out.

He stepped in and was immediately taken to the wall. He looked at every photo as though it would be the last time seeing any of them. His smile broadened when he saw one of he and Clara in black and white. It was on their wedding day at the reception which was held at the bar.

She sat on the top of her piano with her legs crossed. Her dress billowing around her and showing off her shoulders. Her chin in her palms as Merle sat on the bench with a confused look on his face as he tried to mimic her coolness on those keys. His bowtie undone and hair a bit of a mess with a s mile on his face.

"You were trying to play Billy Joel, remember?" she asked from behind him. He turned and saw her standing with some clothes in her hold. He nodded in remembrance. "They're yours," she said as she handed the pile to him. He nodded his thanks and they stood there in an awkward silence.

Clara took a deep breath and turned around, going about this and that, getting the bed ready. Excitement soared through her. So much so that her eyes became misty. Since the last time she had seen him, sleeping next to him was what she missed most. She was scared to think that this was a dream, but when she felt his hand on her elbow, she turned and knew this couldn't be any dream.

He looked years younger standing there in his black sleep pants and gray tee shirt. She felt her heart skip a beat as she felt the pillow slip through her hand. She quickly picked it up and put it back and began stumbling with her words.

"I should go get ready too," she said quickly and paced out the door and too the bathroom. Merle sighed and set out his weapons and clothes in order just to be on the safe side of things. He looked up when he heart light footsteps.

Damn.

She wore a black camisole top and gray sleep pants. It showed off every single one of her curves and Merle could have sworn he felt himself go stupid. She smiled warmly at him, taking deep breaths as she made her way to the bed. She lifted the thick blanket up and slid in underneath.

_Why in the hell did she ever want me?_

"Hey," she said. He looked at her with uncertainty. "It's okay. Come to bed," she softly let out as she patted the right side of the blankets.

He nodded and hesitantly slid in next to her. Clara blew out the candles and snuggled down into the bed. Merle laid his head back on the pillow and remembered the bed's feel. He let out a relieved and quiet sigh.

About a half hour had passed by when Merle, who was still awake, felt the bed shift slightly. Suddenly he felt Clara's smooth skin against his arms and her head on his chest. She draped her arms around his chest pulled herself closer to him.

""I forgot how hot you get at night," she whispered. Merle laughed softly as he pulled her closer and ran his fingers through her hair.


	13. Chapter 13

Author's Note: I was going through my story here and I realized how many errors there were. I am so sorry! I actually planned to upload Chapter 14 today and I still am, but I realized it will seem like rubbish unless I edit this chapter, which thank goodness was just the one before the upcoming next. So reread this guy here and then Chapter 14 will make sense. I had forgotten to place the font in italics, which in my work means dreams and flashbacks. So even I was baffled when I reread this earlier.

So here you all go. Chapter 13 Revised. Chapter 14 will follow up tonight.

_They had fallen asleep. Well. She had passed out in a slightly drunken stooper while he went along for the ride and dozed off after she did. But nonetheless, there they were._

_Laying on top of each other._

_On his couch._

_Still clad in their clothes._

_And ridiculously late hour_

_She resting her head on his chest, listening to the music that was playing inside of him. She couldn't help help but press her ear to him and admire what she heard. So peaceful. So lax. It reminded of how she felt sitting in front of a piano._

_Clara didn't notice when he woke. Didn't notice the rapid beating of his heart as he watched her listen to him. It sent butterflies down his spine when he saw her smile and watched her mouth move and listen to her whisper._

_He wanted to stroke her hair. Her cheek. Anything, but he didn't want to disrupt her in her peace._

_"When I feel blue in the night._

_And I need you to hold me tight._

_Whenever I want you all I have to do is dream._

_Dream._

_Dream._

_Dream."_

_She stopped singing and he held his breath as she slowly made her way up to his gaze. She smiled warmly at him and propped her chin on his chest._

_"I'm sorry," she whispered. He burrowed his brow and gave a small smile._

_"F' what?"_

_"I don't know," she said in a flustered tone. "Thank you for bringing me up here."_

_"Well I sure as hell was 'n so shape to drive my bike. Figured this was the next best thing," he reasoned. She buried her face into the nook of his neck and he tightened his hold on her, sighing contently. Clara nonchalantly began to brush her fingers along his rigid torso, feeling the soft, black cotton beneath her fingertips. It was driving him insane and he silenced his groan as much as he could._

_"What if this doesn't work?" she asked. It caught him off guard and he propped himself up slightly, she resting her chin on his chest again._

_"Wha's that, sugar," he asked. She bit her lip and pecked a kiss on his chest._

_"This. What we are doing. It won't ever be the same after this."_

_"Well I don't plan on makin' t'is not work, darlin'. Promise," he said as he stroked her hair out of her eyes. "Waited t' long."_

_She stared into his icy blue eyes and saw so much determination and adoration, it gave her the shivers. Looking down at his long body, taking him in right in this moment, she knew what the rest of the night had in store._

_Her kiss was quick. It started out slightly shivery, nervous, curious. She picked herself up and without breaking apart she straddled him. Clara brought her hands up to his face and ran her fingers through his hair._

_Merle reached up and cupped her cheek as his tongue teased her lips. The soft mews that exited her throat drove him crazy. Her scent. Her taste. Her sounds. Her feel. He needed her. She needed him._

_He didn't know what he was thinking when he sat up and hoisted her over his shoulder. Maybe he was still a little buzzed. Maybe he was thinking absolutely clear. He didn't know and it scared him._

_She yelped with surprise and giggled as she bounced on his shoulder. Merle found his way to his bedroom and entered, slamming the door hard behind him. He growled with desire as he gently lowered her, but she wrapped her legs tight around his waist on the way down, kissing his mouth with need. He walked them to his bed and laid down on top of her, never breaking their kiss._

_Shit_

_The hard bulge in his jeans rubbed against her and she moaned into his mouth, biting his lip gently. Cupping her face, he kissed her roughly with need, tasting her sweet tongue as he used his other hand to cup her breast. Picking herself up, she reached for the hem of her tee shirt and lifted it over her head, revealing her purple bra and accentuating her breast and hourglass waist._

_He felt himself go stupid._

_He pushed her down again with his mouth and ran his fingers over her smooth skin, sending shivers all throughout her body. Clara smiled against him and took in his scent._

_Soap._

_Fallen leaves._

_The bar._

_A garage._

_She loved it._

_He felt her fingers try to lift his shirt. The slightly cooler air touching his skin sent his nerves awry and he placed his hand over here, stopping her._

_"Don't," he whispered. Confusion and worry crossed Clara's face and she kissed the corner of his mouth._

_"What's wrong?" she softly asked. Merle swallowed hard and shrugged over her. He laughed nervously and felt himself turn red._

_"It's not too nice lookin' under this," he said with shame in his voice. Clara stroked his face and he closed his eyes, relishing her touch. She sat up and he sat back, slightly defeated. She touched his cheek and shrugged her shoulders. Smiling over at him and without breaking eye contact, she reached behind her back._

_Merle swallowed hard and watched her bra drop. He felt his heart race and pound. He felt sweat on his forehead._

_Christ, she's a beauty._

_Clara climbed over to him on her knees and grazed his fingers with hers. He knew what she wanted. Taking a breath, he lifted his shirt over his head and threw it on the ground._

_Her eyes fell to his thick torso and took him in. What she saw next sent her blood still._

_Scars. So many scars. A deep one across his chest. Slight pink strips at random parts of his stomach and on his sides. She reached out and ran her fingers across some of them. She swallowed her tears that he saw and bent down to his chest, kissing the scar on his chest._

_"I'm so sorry," she whispered. Merle took a steady breath and picked up his hands, bringing his fingers to the swell of her breasts. He kissed her softly, as softly as he could to reassure her that he was strong._

_"Y' beautiful," he whispered._

_"So are you," she smiled. Merle kissed her again and his arm snaked around her and brought her down into the blankets. He kissed her again and worked his way to her neck. He suckled gently on her skin, sending goosebumps all over her and she arched her back in the pleasure of it._

_He groaned into her ear as he cupped her breast, kneading the soft flesh. She kissed him hard and he then brought his lips down to her chest, taking one breast into his hot mouth and cupping the other._

_She moaned with excitement when she felt his hand unzip her jeans. In a teasing manner, he ran his finger along her waistline as he flicked her nipple with his warm tongue._

_She yelped with a laugh when in one swift motion, he dragged her jeans and panties off and threw them across the room. She couldn't control her laughter and she fell back into the blankets, bringing a smile across his face._

_He took her in. Perfect was the only word to cross his mind. She smiled at him and stared at the bulge in the front of his pants._

_"Come here," she whispered seductively. Merle took a sharp breath and bent down to her, taking her mouth to his again. He felt her hands on his chest, her fingers lingering over his scars, leaving a loving touch. He hissed as she left goosebumps where her fingers had traced._

_She kissed his neck and he stilled when he felt her fingers working at the button of his jeans. He held himself higher over her, supporting all of his weight in his arms as he felt the workings of her slowly pulling down the zipper. He assisted her in pulling both his jeans and boxers over his bottom, kicking them off with a relieved sigh. She looked up at him and bit her lip._

_"Its official," she said. "We are naked." Merle looked down at them both and nodded is head, trying not to laugh._

_"You are one very smart woman," he said._

_He kissed her. She kissed him back._

_She kisses me back._

_He kissed her chin. Her neck. He kissed her collarbone and her breasts._

_Clara arched her back with every touch._

_He kissed her soft skin all the way down to waistline. Her thick body trembled. Her scent intoxicated him as she lay exposed before him, watching her writhe with a swollen lip._

_He kissed the inner part of her thigh and slowly suckled on her skin. Her soft mews sent him into overdrive as he made his way to her other thigh, repeating what he had done, only giving her a gentle nip._

_He brought his hand to her hip and caressed it and made its ways down to her thigh, which he brought up and rubbed it in a supporting manner._

_Clara tried her hardest to contain her sounds as she felt his tongue flicker across her throbbing center. She took deep breaths. Very deep breaths that inevitably turned into crying moans, trophies to him. She tried not to buck her hips, but with every satisfied groan that came from below her, she felt encouraged to let loose._

_Merle suckled on her once more before bringing his fingers to her and rubbing her in a slow, circular motion. She ran her fingers through his hair and tugged slightly at him. He flicked his tongue across her once more before returning to her lips. Clara put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him up and motioned for him to lay on his back._

_He ran his thumb across her nipple as she kissed him then touched her short, soft locks of hair. Her lips pranced down his neck to his chest, where she took her time kissing each and every man made mark on him. She poured love and healing into every kiss and he felt it._

_He also felt her hand dance down his stomach and graze the tip of him, sending him over the edge, sending a shuddered moan to her ears._

_She smiled against his skin and he ran his fingers through her locks once more, letting an unseen smile of his escape. She left moist kisses down his chest and to his waistline._

_When he felt her hand wrap around his shaft, he let out a hiss and grabbed on to the sheets, wringing his fist in them. She giggled in her still slightly drunken buzz and tightened her grip. He shuddered under her hold and panted slightly._

_Clara bit her lip and watched him jerk in pleasure. She licked her lips and contemplated for short time before bringing her lips to the tip of him._

_Merle's eyes shot open when he felt her warm, wet tongue take gentle licks at him. He let out a rather pleasurable growl and gently bucked his hips. She then started taking him in her mouth, inch by inch, as far as she could and slowly began to bob her head on him. He gently ran his fingers through her slowly bobbling head, watching her sweetly sucking on him. Merle ran his hand down to her chin and she stopped and looked up at him._

_"Come up here," he said. Her lips pouted and her smokey eyes looked worried._

_"Am I doing something wrong?" she asked. Merle's eyes widened and he shook his head vigorously with a laugh._

_"Christ. Not 't all, baby. Just come up 'ere."_

_Clara let him go gently and climbed her way back up to him. He kissed her lips in a soft yet hard manner. His fingers found her hair again and gently tugged at her locks as his kiss deepened. With a swift motion, he sat up on his side and laid her down into the blankets. He kissed her again and brought his hand to her breast and cupped it with his rough hand._

_She felt his hot lips on her neck, leaving a trail of kisses down to her breast. She moaned as he covered her nipple with his mouth, his tongue flickering on the soft pink flesh, leaving it erect when he made his way back to her mouth._

_Merle moved her legs apart with his knees and he settled in between them, kissing her deep, nervous, breaths away. His hands found her face and stroked her hair._

_"We don't got to if ya don't want to," he whispered. She smiled and ran her finger across his lips. He kissed it._

_"I want too. I really want too," she said, biting her lip to stifle her moan as she felt his length rest along her inner thigh. He smiled as he got closer to her again and suckled on her ear. "Kiss me?" she asked. Merle didn't wait. He answered her, his lips on his._

_Clara reached down and stroked him. She watched his eyes slam shut in pleasure and open full of lust and desire and felt the sheets shift as he grabbed them and wrung his fist in them once more. He kissed her hard and positioned himself closer to her aching center, rubbing her with his throbbing tip._

_"Tell me t' stop if ya want me to stop," he said hoarsely. She bit her lip and kissed him. She was about to say that she wasn't going to break, but with her hand still gripped around his shaft, realizing just how well endowed he was, she held back her statement and nodded._

_"Okay," she whispered. He kissed her repositioned himself. Her heat nearly sent him overboard as he rubbed her entrance. He buried his head in the nook of her neck._

_Her breathing quickened as his tip entered her when she realized one little thing._

_Her eyes snapped open._

_"Stop," she whispered. Merle pulled back and opened his eyes with slight confusion._

_"Are ya alright? We didn' even get all that far," he said. Clara stifled a laugh and kissed his lips._

_"Do you have a condom?" she asked with hopeful eyes._

_Goddamnit._

_Hope left his eyes and he rested his head against her breast. He moaned in agony as she laughed, running her palm across his back. He panted in defeat as he picked his head up again. He was met with her loving eyes and gleaming smile. He flushed with embarrassment._

_"T'is sucks," he drew out. She nodded with a pouted lip."M' sorry," he whispered._

_"Don't be sorry. Just means we weren't supposed to do it tonight," she said. Merle growled in frustration and rested his head on her breast once more and she ran her fingers through his curls. She felt him throb against her thigh once more and a pang of guilt hit her along with a thought._

_Hell, its not as if I don't want to and it doesn't mean we can't do it in other ways._

_With that, Clara gently moved beneath him. Confused, he moved over, expecting her to put her clothes back on, but when she placed her palms on his chest, he looked up and was taken back by the lust and determination in her eyes. She gently pushed him back into the sheets and kissed him deeply, making her way to his neck and nipping at his collarbone. She trailed her tongue across his chest and he let out a moan. He closed his eyes as she kissed at each and every one of his scars as she did before and kept on going._

_Lower._

_"Clara?" he said._

_Lower._

_"C-Clara?" His voice broke in ecstasy._

_Lower._

_He felt her tongue circle around his tip and he saw stars._

A/N: I feel so dirty...


	14. Chapter 14

Author's Note: Well? Was Chapter 13's edit alright? Sorry about that. And I'm sorry about the long delay. Between friends, family, work, holidays, and what not, it's been hard to even think straight enough to think about what to cook for dinner. But my ball has been rolling and I think I can get back to steady updates.

I'm taking a three month leap and writing my Christmas chapter after this. I know, I know. Im way late. Just when the holidays are over.

-Kadie

Merle opened his eyes and growled in slight frustration. The throbbing ache between his legs had only been getting worse. He would take care of it in private, but seeing Clara laying down with her curvy bottom in his view every morning made it difficult to even move. He tried to calm his erection by thinking of anything, but it all went back to her.

Her back.

Her bottom.

Her lips.

Her neck.

"God damnit," he growled. He moved in the sheets, causing her to stir slightly. He didn't want to wake her too early on his account. He settled still and stared up at the ceiling. His eyes found a lone glow in the dark star that Was given to Clara by Shawn years ago. She promised to stick it up and she did, making him smile in the dark.

His eyes shifted to the wall and landed on a photo of himself and Clara cradling Shawn on the day of his birth. He knew that their wedding day was one of the happiest days of their lives, but when Martin walked over from Daryl and over to he and Clara, the gleam in her eyes and the radiance she gave off, he knew that when the baby was laid in her arms, that small day in the history of time was the happiest of hers.

He fought with himself for many years about not being able to give her a baby. They had thought about adoption, but those thoughts stopped when she had told him her gut feeling about it.

_"Maybe we just shouldn't be parents. Maybe what we have here and now with each other is enough. We have to look at the brighter side of this,"_ he remembered her say to him the morning after they found out that she had mid-staged cervical cancer.

He shifted uneasily at the memory. No amount of drugs were ever able to make him forget that day. He had tried.

_She had woken up in the night with a pain in her belly so severe that Merle couldn't touch her. _

_She cried for him as he called the ambulance._

_She screamed for her sister._

_When they got to the hospital, nobody was allowed in the room. Daryl had arrived with Davy and Lulu about an hour after they got there. Brandon and Jarred later on in the day._

_Martin was sitting with Merle, who had his head in his hands. Daisy was pacing with fear in her eyes._

_"Mr. Dixon?" said a young man's voice. Merle practically ran over to the man._

_"Is'she a'right?" he asked in haste. He watched the doctor take a deep breath. Daisy ran up beside Merle and listened closely to the doctor's speech. _

_Most of what the doctor said was still a blur to Merle to this day as he remembered the feeling he had when they were said, it overpowering any thought process he had at the time._

_He remembered feeling Daisy's hand on his shoulder._

_"A complete hysterectomy would promise that the cancer not return. We're lucky because it's not too late in the process. If we wait, I cannot promise how slow it would spread. If we perform it now, she could be home in a week after some more testing."_

_He looked to Daisy, who was shaking. They locked eyes and both let tears swim down their face._

_"She'll never f'give me, Dais," he said. She sniffed and wiped her eyes and looked at him with most certainty._

_"I promise you that she will."_

_Merle looked back to the doctor and nodded slowly. He reached for the clipboard and signed the okay. The doctor patted Merle's shoulder._

_"I will go and begin the prep," he said softly and was off. Merle listened to the footsteps fade down the hallway and took a deep breath. He turned and saw Daryl, whose color had drained slightly from his face. Merle pinched the bridge of his nose and let himself fall into his brother's open embrace._

Merle had gotten up from his memory and walked over to the wall, taking the photo off and cradled it lovingly. He went back and sat at the end of the bed gazing at it.

He didn't know she was awake and when he felt the sheets shift, he looked behind him to see her sitting up and alert. She tried to see what photo he was holding, but she couldn't quite make it out.

"It's early yet," she whispered.

"Yeah," he said softly.

"Come back and sleep some more for a little while."

"Yeah, I don't think 'm tired anymore."

"What picture is that?" she asked curiously. He held it up in the moonlight and she sighed with a smile. He scooted back to her with the photo. "That was one great day," she said as she took it from him and gazed into it.

"Yeah. Just thinkin' about it," he lied with a furrow in his brow. She smiled at him and nodded.

"Liar," she said.

"Yeah. That's true," he whispered with a hint of sadness in his tone. Settling back down into the blankets, he took is left hand and placed on her belly. She looked down at his laying form and smiled at his gesture, knowing exactly what was running through his mind. Placing her hand over his, she settled back down beside him on her side so the we're facing each other.

"What's the matter, Merle?" she whispered. He let out a sigh and shook his head, his lips pursed together, as if trying to keep from words escaping. "Come on. You're doing that thing."

"What' thing?" he questioned. She giggled and pointed her finger to his mouth, touching his lips. It took everything he had not to kiss her finger.

"That thing. Every time you want to say something, but won't, you get all tight lipped and your jaw gets solid."

"No idea what ya talkin' 'bout," he replied gruffly, trying to hide is grin. He shuddered when he felt her finger trace his jawline.

"Talk to me," she said. She felt his grip tighten around her belly and she tightened hers around his hand.

"Do you fo'give me?" he asked barely above a whisper. She studied his face. Like a child about to be punished by his parent.

"Your decision saved my life. Why do you need to be forgiven for that?"

"Because I feel like I took it all the same."

They laid in silence until it was unbearable to Clara's ears. She sat up and started pacing the room in what seemed like anger to Merle. He sat up and pulled his legs off the bed, rubbing his stumped wrist and watched her walk around aimlessly in the dark. She walked to the window and smiled at the snow that fell.

"Dixon?" she asked.

"Reese?" he responded.

"Come over here," she ordered. He slowly rose and scratched the back of his head as he studied her gaze on the snowfall. He walked over to the window and stood in silence beside her. He jumped slightly when he felt her fingers intertwine with his.

"We are not promised tomorrow," she started. "I'm sick of moping about the last three years. It's a waste of time and tears."

"Cla-."

"Shut up and let me finish," she said. Merle closed his mouth. "I have missed you. I thought I lost you. You found me. You're my best friend and the best thing I ever did. We have had more ups than downs and I intend to keep it that way."

Clara brought his hand up to her and put it over her heart. She placed her hand on his chest and looked into his confused eyes.

"We are going to go on about life as though the past three years between us never happened. We are going to pick up where we left off and we are going to be fucking awesome at it. No more questioning anything. No more moping. No more of it. I am done. I want you back. I need my husband. I need my lover and my friend. And I need someone to go up into the attic later and get down all the Christmas decorations."

"Huh?"

"Will you start over with me and pick up where we left off? On that amazing note?"

Merle breathed hard and looked into her welled eyes. He couldn't deny her again.

"I will, baby. I swear it I will," he nodded feverishly. She smiled and sobbed. He pulled her close and kissed her tear streaked cheeks and wrapped his long arms around her and hugged her tight as she tightened her hold on his shirt.

They stayed like that until their muscles got stiff.

When they untangled, she wiped her face and smiled warmly. She saw the stress in his face dissipate and she knew that this idea could work for the both of them. Brushing her short hair to the side, she suddenly blushed. She felt giddy and excited as did he. They stood and twisted awkwardly like two teenagers.

"This is good," she declared hopefully.

"It's ya idea, baby. You have the best ideas."

"I do, don't I?" she agreed. She took him by his hand and walked them back to the bed and pulled him down beside her. "I'm scared."

"Me too."

"It will be fine, I'm sure. We just up where we left off."

She watched as Merle's mouth formed into a big grin. She recognized that gleam in his eye as a wife does her husband. She huffed and scoffed and blushed.

"I can show ya where we left off, Sugar," he whispered huskily into her ear. She fought the urge to jump on him.

"I think not, bud. I'm not that easy. You are going to have to butter me up real good before you get into these pants," she giggled out. Merle laughed out and kissed her shoulder.

"Shouldn't take long," he said. He felt her hit his arm and he chuckled.

"Dixon?"

"Yeah?"

"Kiss me?," she asked dreamily. His body and breathing stilled as the words escaped her lips. His lips quivered as he thought if he should do it or not. He studied her face and worked up to her eyes. Her lips begged and pouted, ready and waiting for him.

"Are-are ya sure?"

"Please?"

He wouldn't deny her any longer.


	15. Chapter 15

Author's Note: Here is a little something somethin'. Review and enjoy. More to come immediately!

"There's a storm brewin'," said Hershel with a slight grin. Lulu turned around to face him as he brushed Cloyde. Walking to him, she handed him a pail.

"How could you be so sure?" she asked. He chuckled and handed her his crutch, getting to one knee and placing the pail neath the enormous animal.

"Farmer's intuition, I suppose," he said as he milked Cloyde. Lulu looked up and out to the far sky, trying to sense what he sensed when in came Maggie and Beth. They had concerned looks on their faces, but smiled at Lulu.

"Hello ladies," welcomed Lulu. Beth smiled warmly as the older woman brushed her shoulder.

"Hey Lulu. Daddy? A storm?" asked Beth with slight worry in her voice.

"I know. I know," he responded. Lulu stood with curiosity.

"It looks bad," said Maggie. "Want me to go warn Rick?"

"We've been through a few storms here. We had one bad one, but ever since we secured this place, we haven't had a problem.I think we'll manage," assured Lulu. Hershel stood with the pail and retrieved his crutch. Maggie took the pail as he snugged on is coat.

"I can almost guarantee a few feet, Lulu. I can feel it in the wind. You can't hear it in the air?" he asked. Lulu shook her head when she felt something cold and wet land on her hand. She looked down to see a lone snowflake the size of a quarter. She laughed in disbelief and looked back at Beth and Maggie.

"Maybe you should tell Rick. Go to Clara and Merle's and let everyone know. I'll get everyone else," she said. She watched Maggie and Beth turn and make their leave. Looking back at Hershel, she shrugged and steadied the pail. "I want you to teach me that."

Hershel chuckled and made his way out of the barn with Lulu close behind. She handed him the pail as she locked up the doors. Looking up she saw a the sky begin to darken.

"We have hours yet," he said, breaking her gaze.

"That's not what I'm worried about," she replied, concern and slight fear in her eyes. "The last time we had a storm this bad, if it is as bad as you predict, there's a chance of walkers."

"The snow and cold weather should stall them. And you all have this place secured to the max. I wouldn't worry too much."

"It's not the dead ones I'm worried about," she said. Hershel licked his lips and nodded.

"I just think it would dampen everyone's spirits if you put up Christmas decorations," argued Rick to Clara, who stood practically wrapped in garland.

"Well I think it would distract a few of us. Quite frankly I think a few of us could use a bit of a distraction. It won't hurt anyone, right Carl?"

"I think it wouldn't so any harm," the young boy said. Lori smiled and went thought the box of decorations.

"I don't even know what day it is," said Martin, bewildered at the scene before him.

"It's around the fifteenth," Daryl said as he handed a Daisy a pine cone covered in glitter. Looking at the sparkles left over on his hand, he gave a disgusted look.

"See?" said Clara. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose. "They won't be up long. Don't be a Scrooge, Rick. It will be fun. We can have a tiny party," she argued when she heard her walkie talkie static. She untangled herself and threw the garland on an unexpected Merle as he walked into the room. The man stood in confusion and garland as he nodded to Rick and leaned in.

"If it's anyt'ing t' ya, there's only one box of this stuff t'at she knows about," whispered Merle.

They all watched her as she picked up the walkie and and raised the volume.

"Who is trying to get to someone?" asked Clara into her walkie. They all listened closely to it.

"It's Glenn. Hey, so Maggie just said that Hershel said that there is a nasty storm coming on us," he said. Clara locked her eyes with Martin and Daisy. She scratched her nose and spoke up again.

"Did he say how bad he thinks it will be, sweetie?"

"I didn't get that much info, but Maggie is on her way over there right now. She's kind of worried."

"She shouldn't worry."

"I'm not worried!" said a loud voice from across the room. They all looked up and saw Maggie with a hint of anger on her mouth. Clara bit back a laugh and waved her over.

"That's her, isn't it?" the young man asked nervously through the device.

"Yeah, sweetie. She just got here."

"She mad?" he asked, Clara looked at Maggie and bit her lip.

"I'm going to plead the fifth on that one. Why don't you bring Hershel on down here so we can talk about this."

"No problem. See you in a few."

Clara lowered the volume and turned to everyone. Maggie played with her fingers and spoke up.

"We'll I can tell you what my dad will. A few feet. The snow is falling already and at the size of quarters."

"Y'all can tell already?" asked Martin. "How can you be sure?"

"Farmer's intuition?" she suggested.

Merle saw the worry on Clara's face as she looked at Daisy. She played with her fingers and took deep breaths. Running her fingers through her short hair, she walked over to Martin and was silently discussing something from him. Merle followed her and stood by her side.

"Wha's goin' on?" he asked. Clara licked her lips and nodded.

"Nothing. Nothing is going on," she said. Merle scoffed and looked at her face.

"Known ya most of my life. I know when somethin' ain't right with ya."

"Really, I'm fine."

"Don't lie t' me," he pleaded. Clara swallowed hard and looked back at Martin. The large man sighed and put his hands in his pockets.

"I already told him, Clara," she heard Martin say. Her face became angry and scared and she took one step closer to her brother in law. Merle knew what Martin was talking about.

"Why did you do that?"

"I had to. He's your husband. You have too much weight on your shoulders as is."

"He's right, Clara," Daisy said. Clara growled at the moment and rubbed her eyes.

"It happened in t' winter?" asked Merle as he rubbed the small of Clara's back. They all nodded. He felt her tense and shake. He pulled her tightly into him and felt her relax a bit.

"First snowfall," added Daisy.

They all stood in silence for what seemed like hours. It wasn't until they heard Glenn and Hershel at the door that they broke their silence and gazes.

"Go and sit with her," Hershel said to Glenn, whonwas looking at Maggie sitting with Carl. They young man was hesitant, but listened all the same as Hershel carried himself over to rest of the small group. "Hello everyone."

"Hey man. What this about a storm?" asked Martin. At this, Rick made his way over and began to listen.

"It's comin' slowly but surely. A few feet at least. About two day. Maybe and early third."

"How much time before it gets heavy?" asked Rick.

"Enough time to gather everyone into one spot."

"Sounds good enough to me," said Clara. "Glenn? Can you go and tell everyone to gather up whatever bedding they have and bring it on over here"

"Of course," he said as he stood with Maggie's hand in his, making their way for the doors.

"Are you sure you want everyone here?" asked Daisy? We can bunker down at our house like the first night. Clara sighed and shrugged.

"We've got more space down here. Won't be as crammed."

"Do I get a say in any of t'is?" asked Merle with a hint of anger brewing in his face. Clara softly smiled and reached her palm up to his cheek and caressed it without uttering a word. She and everyone else saw him fight against it, but she was his kryptonite. Defeated, he grunted and turned away. Clara turned the opposite and smiled at everyone.

"Do you always get your way?" asked Rick as he picked up another pine cone.

"With him? Mostly," she replied. "I'm going to go and clear everything to the sides."

"I'll go and figure out how to feed everyone," said Daisy.

"Let me help?" asked Lori. "Please? I'm tired of everyone treating me like I'm crippled." she sat up and waddled on over to where they stood.

"We know you're not crippled. We are just being careful," said Daisy.

"I won't break. I have done this before," she said with a fed up tone.

"Fiesty," sang Clara. " Come help me move pillows," she said sarcastically. Lori sighed and fought a laugh.

"Hey," perked Martin. "We'll have an audience Clara."

The room went silent and everyone turned to her. She blushed and fidgeted and looked back at Martin.

"Oh I don't know about that, Marty. It's been awhile," she reasoned. And it had. The last time she had played her piano had been shortly after the outbreak. She hadn't sung either. She had no desire. Nobody questioned it.

"You say decorations'll take ev'ryone's mind off things," said Merle from across the room. Clara turned to his voice.

There he stood. Knee bent and leaning against the wall. One elbow on her piano. His other hand in his pocket. Head cocked. She melted.

"I'll think about it," she whispered with a smile.

They all watched her make her way upstairs while her eyes were locked with her husbands, but Merle knew that they were locked on her piano.


	16. Chapter 16

Author's Note: I had this short and sweet chapter floating around in my head for about a week now. Please let me know what you think.

_He stood there in the kitchen, afraid to meet her gaze. Boots tied with his black jeans tucked in sloppily. Green tee shirt with his leather vest. She smiled inwardly at the unseen angel wings on his back that her own mother had sewn on for him. One bag with what was probably all the clothes he had stuffed in it. Another bag of what looked like supplies of sorts. Gun in his belt. Crossbow at his feet._

_"What are you doing, Daryl?" asked Clara. He bit his fingernail. Scratched his ear. He finally looked at her and said barely above a whisper._

_"Merle. I'm goin' t' get him."_

_She studied him. She knew that this day was coming the day she realized to herself that this was some sort of plague. The virus had started out small. It was slowly spreading all over. At this point, the powers that be strongly advised that everyone stay inside. More stations on the radio and TV had slowly been dropping signal one by one. Tanks roamed the town. It had only been weeks._

_"You need to stay. It's too dangerous out there," she said firmly. He nodded at her clear observation, biting back a wise comment. _

_"I know. It's only gettin' worse though, right?"_

_"Yeah and fast," she added, crossing her arms as she stood in front of him. _

_"That's why I'm goin' t' get him. Rather the dumbass be here when more shit hits the fan."_

_"The dumbass is an adult who can take care of himself."_

_"I can't?" he added. She rolled her eyes._

_"Now you know that's not at all what I meant, Daryl," she retorted. He sighed and crossed his arms, matching her standoffish appearance. They locked their eyes and she ran her fingers through her short hair. "Look. It's crazy out there. Look at how many people have died."_

_"I'll be careful. I lasted years livin' with my old man. Ain't no zombie goin' t' get at me. Kick it's ass," he stated. _

_"I love that you're so brave, but Merle knows where his home is. He knows how to get here and he lived with your father for many years as well. There isn't a zombie that can get him either."_

_"Clara," he started, but she cut him off with a louder and desperate tone. He saw her tremble and heard her voice crack._

_"He took off, Daryl. I had no say in that matter. I tried so hard. I miss him. I miss my husband. I want nothing more than to have him back here with us, but I cannot make that happen. I can have a say with you that I didnt get the chance to with Merle. You have me and Daisy. Martin and Shawn. Our whole damned family is here. It's so scary out there and-"_

_"He's my brother, Clara."_

_"You're MY brother!" she cried, tears appearing from nowhere. She clutched her shirt at the heart and her knees wobbled. "You're mine!" she sobbed. _

_He didn't know what made him do it. He had never done it before, but when he saw the tears fall from her face, he grabbed her and hugged her tight. She kept repeating herself over and over. He pulled her away and placed his hand on her lips, silencing her. He brushed her hair from her eyes and watched her lips tremble._

_"I need to do this," he whispered. She sadly smiled with acknowledgment, nodding and holding herself tight. _

_"I can't lose you too," she sobbed quietly. Daryl squeezed her shoulders and brought her in for one more hug._

_"You won't. Promise. I will find him. I'll get us back here."_

_Clara took a deep breath and steadied herself in his hold. He gave her his smile and kissed her cheek. He scooped his bags and crossbow up and settled himself._

_"Don't you dare say 'goodbye' to me, Daryl Dixon. Don't you dare," she said. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it. He leaned it and she took in his scent that was similar to his brother's, but was his own._

_"I will see you later."_

_With that, he let her go and was out before the sun came up._


	17. Chapter 17

Author's Note: Well I certainly have been on a roll. That always happens to me and I cannot stand it. I could write chapter after chapter after chapter and then...blank...So I apologize now and in advance. I do try to keep my mind motivated. You all have so much to do with that. If not all of it. My reviewers and followers are truly amazing. Kathy and Jess, I love you to pieces.

As always, let me know what you think.

I don't own ANY of the songs Clara will sing in this chapter.

Hugs and High Fives,

Kadie

Oh and PS,

Yes I saw the episode. And no, I do not want to talk about it.

Carry on.

Merle tried to bite his tongue the second Martin had suggested to Clara that she play. And he did for about twenty seconds until he tasted his own blood.

"_You say decorations'll take ev'ryone's mind off things_," he had said.

_Really, you dumbshit? That's what you think of?_ He thought as he helped her gather whatever bedding they had for the awkward evening he had in store for himself. Although she didn't look it by eye, he could tell something was bothering her. Her unsteady breathing and fidgety demeanor got the best of her.

"What's wrong?" he asked. Clara turned with a pillow in her hands and smiled.

"Nothing. What's wrong with you?" she shot back.

"Not a thing."

"Liar," she said.

"You're the liar t'is time, sugar," he responded. Her smile dropped a little and she shrugged.

"I'm just scared," she whispered. She watched him sigh and saw his eyebrows close in together in concentration.

"I'm here. Won't let a thing happen to ya. Ya've got no need to be scared anymore, Clara," he said. She laughed and bit her lip. Smiling over at him, he saw her eyes well up.

"But I do, Merle. There aren't too many people out there. The ones who are living in this mess aren't the people they once were, I can assure it. You know it. Remember Hank Southers?" she asked as she took a seat on their bed. Merle laughed slightly and nodded.

"Kicked his ass in the twelfth grade," he remembered. "Decent guy after high school."

"I killed him," she said coldly. Merle swallowed hard and took a deep breath. "He, uh, he and a few other men found us and raided lots of our things. I heard yelling and I heard crying," she said as she felt her throat tighten and felt hot tears run down her face. "They tied them up. They tied up Martin and Shawn. I heard Shawn scream so loud. Merle he screamed so loud," she sobbed. Merle's breathing got harder with anger. He stopped himself from going to her. She needed this.

"So I ran. I ran downstairs. I ran for your belt of knives. Then I ran to my bike and I never pushed so hard. I wasn't thinking. I was just going as fast as I could. My legs burned. My chest ached," she said softly as she gritted her teeth and squeezed the pillow. "Then I saw them. They were bound like prisoners. Martin was covering Shawn. His men had bats and hammers. Bats and hammers to a little boy! Hank had a gun. He had a gun at Daisy. It was pointed right here," she whispered as she touched the space between her eyes and shook. "He heard me. I put the brakes on my bike and I grabbed a knife from your belt and I did what you told me to do at the bar, remember? Remember how you told me to throw at the point and not the butt?"

Merle nodded sadly. Proud that she remembered. Relieved that she remembered.

"And so I did. I threw it when he turned around and then there was blood everywhere. There was blood on Daisy. The two other men ran," she stated. She laughed for a moment. "Must've scared them I guess. It's funny though. I was more scared of them then they were of me. And after all of that, after all the stories that the guys told me about what's outside of here, I'd rather be stuck in a room full of walkers than with someone with an evil heart."

Merle took one more deep breath and walked over to her and sat. They were in silence for what seemed like forever until he finally spoke up.

"Can't tell ya how many people I killed since this shit started," he confided to his surprise. She shuttered, but wasn't shocked.

"We are just as bad. We're monsters," she said barely above a whisper. She felt Merle nod his head in disagreement.

"I know t'at when the time comes, God will not think t'at any of us are monsters. I've done lots'a messed up shit these past few years. Hurt so many people. I killed to protect. To protect me and Daryl. Then I started to protect Carol and Sophia. Soon it was Carl and Lori. Shit, I even popped a cap in some guy who was about to slice T's throat."

"That's awful," she said.

"You do what you have to to protect the ones who matter t' ya. God won't punish ya for t'at. I'm the one who should be worried about answerin' anythin'," he said as he looked forward. Clara turned to him and shook her head.

"I think that when the time does come, God will see all of the wrong that you're righting. He will see how you've made it all up to me."

"I still gotta lot o' righting t' do, sugar," he said. Merle jumped slightly when he felt her hand snake onto his. He looked down at it and then to her.

"Its not as much as you think," she whispered with a small grin. Merle leant down to kiss her lips.

They just always look like they need a kiss, he thought.

Just before they met, they were interrupted by a knock at the door. Sighing with a growl, Merle looked to the door and saw Shawn standing wide eyed. Clara blushed and giggled.

"What d' ya want?" Merle asked with a whine.

"Don't 'what d' ya want?' me," the young man said with spunk.

"Brat," Merle said. Clara playfully slapped his arm. Shawn stepped into the room toward her.

"Mom told me to come up here and help."

"Wise woman, your mother is," exclaimed Clara. They watched Merle grab a pillow.

"This needs t' go down first," he said as he threw the pillow hard at Shawn. "Ya lip blockin' me, kid!"

"That's disgusting," Shawn whispered as he picked up the pillow. Clara laughed and stood, placing a kiss on Shawn's head and took a few quilts and throws. She looked at Merle and gestured to the pillows she had on the table.

"Grab those?" she asked. He raised his hands in defeat and confusion. "You did say you have a lot to make up for," she added. Merle twisted his lips and nodded, standing and grabbing the pillows.

"Are you going to sing for us tonight, Clara?" Shawn asked hopefully. She sighed as she started down the stairs with him.

"I don't really know if I feel up to that, baby. It's been a long time. Rather not play then to fail a crowd."

"Well I think you should," he added as he stepped down. She followed him with a smile, Merle close behind, clad in blankets. She looked at him quizzically when he set the blankets on the floor with disdain.

"It ain't easy t' grab bundles of things sans a hand, darlin'," he said. She shook her head with a laugh.

Within the hour, everybody had heard the order to take shelter at Clara and Merle's house. And within that very hour, Everyone seemed to push every little button of Merle's in the worst way. Merle loved his space. Seeing everyone setting up their spaces in his living room made his eye twitch. Standing at the base of the staircase, he ran his hand through his light curls and sighed. Hearing footsteps, he turned to see Michonne. He took a deep breath and nodded at the woman.

"Hey," he squeaked out. She looked him up and down. Nodding, she spoke.

"Hey."

"Doin' a run tomorrow?" he asked. She looked up up and down again and nodded.

"Yes. Are you coming?"

"Course," he said with surprise. The silence was tense, but comfortable. After what seemed like forever, she began to walk past him. Biting his lips, he turned his head. "Michonne?"

She stiffened and turned around.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry," he blurted. She raised her eyebrows. "I called y' some real nasty things."

"Yes you did."

"Well, I'm sorry."

"You don't strike me as the type to be sorry for anything," she said. Merle huffed with a smile.

"I tried to live my life that way for awhile. Turns out it ain't so great."

"What brought this on?" she asked. He cocked his head and shrugged.

"I don't really know. Since we got here, my wife's kicked my ass a few times with her words. Threw me back into the reality of life 'fore this shit happened. Ive been tryin' to apologize to everyone in m' own way. Ain't real good at it, none."

She was quiet as she took a step back toward him.

"It's not that hard to say you're sorry," she said.

"Well I know t'at. It's getting people to believe it that's hard f' me."

"It isn't as hard as you think. As long as its genuine, you shouldn't worry."

"I guess," he mumbled. Michonne sighed.

"You're forgiven," she said through grit teeth. Merle raised his brows in surprise.

"Ya shittin' me?"

"No. You are. Andrea has been at my ass too. Thanks for making it easier for me," she spoke with a hidden smile. Merle grit his teeth and huffed at the thought of working himself up to say he's sorry to her.

"Lesbo," he said.

"Hick," she shot back.

"Carpetmuncher."

"Deliverance."

"Scissor sister."

Michonne gave him a small grin and and nodded her head.

"Well as long as we have an agreement," she said as she made her way to Andrea, who was setting up their bedding in the living room. Merle let out a laugh and turned around. His laughter ceased once he saw Rick standing there with a knowing smile.

_Fuck_.

"Did that really just happen," Rick asked.

"Are y' deaf an' blind?" asked Merle.

"This is rich," he said as he walked passed.

_God damnit_.

"Fuck off," was all he could say. Rick shook his head and waved his arm up, as if to say whatever. Merle rubbed his head and listen to the muffled voices and goings on that were taking place.

"If you're just going to stand there and look pretty, could you at least do it while helping out with something?" said Daisy from behind him. He turned around and was greeted by his sister in law, who was struggling with a large and empty pot. Merle was quick to grab it and followed her into his kitchen. "Thank you, sir."

"What do ya's need help with?" he asked, setting the pot down on the stove next to Carol and Brandon, who were busy peeling some potatoes and carrots.

"Well we've got it in here, but if you could stir up that pot over there before it scolds, I'd love you to pieces."

Merle walked over to the pot and tried to ignore the conversation about childbirth that Carol and Brandon were having. Merle picked up the large ladle and removed the lid to the pot and nearly fainted in delight.

"Dais' ya killin' me," he said. Daisy spread her smile.

"Don't go spoiling that for everyone. It's a surprise," she ordered with a laugh in her sweet voice.

A short time later after everyone had set up their spots for the remainder of their stay and everyone had content bellies, some of the men decided to do a perimeter check to be on the safe side before the storm finally hit. The rustling of the leaves and static winds sent chills through Clara's bones. Looking outside the window through the curtains, she saw the snow fall rapidly. It was a beautiful sight and she admired Mother Nature's work even in the hellish world that they were living in.

"Are there walkers?" said a small, sturdy voice. She turned her head to see Carl, slight worry in his eyes. She smiled softly at him and stepped over some, making room for him and motioned for him to look outside for himself. When he did, he studied the woods. Studied the snowfall. Studied his own breathing calming.

"Daryl and Martin did a check down that way and Merle and Jarred did one down that way. Got back a few minutes ago. Coasts are all clear, my dear."

She watched as he turned to Sophia and gave her a thumbs up. Clara's heart broke a little, but she pretended she didn't see anything. Closing the curtains, she walked back over to the living room and took in the scene.

Blankets and pillows galore. It looked like a giant slumber party and she tried her hardest not to laugh.

"Its a giant slumber party in here,' said Daryl coming from behind her. She turned and giggled as he set down his crossbow and kicked his boots off.

"I was just thinking the same thing. You sure you don't mind sleeping down here? I know how you like your space."

"Nah. It's cool. Carol wants to be down here, anyway," he said. Clara stared at him and grinned. "What?"

"I just wish you had found her and Sophia before all this happened."

He shrugged and nodded.

"Yeah. Me too. But I only found them cause I was busy finding Merle," he said with satisfaction. "Three birds with one stone."

"Yes you did," she said softly while staring into Daryl. "I was afraid I'd never see you again the morning you left."

"I know ya were."

"You have this tendency to prove me wrong," she smiled. He grinned back and opened his arms for a hug, to which she fell into and patted his shoulders. "Thank you," she whispered.

"Thank you," he said back.

They broke their hug and he ruffled her hair before entering the living room for Carol. She watched him kiss the top of Sophia's head as Carol was running a brush through it. He bent down and kissed Carol's lips and whispered something to her.

When the whole group was settled down, Daisy and Martin went to the kitchen and returned with cups of steamy apple cider. Everybody oohed and ahhed at the fragrant aroma and said their thanks over and over. Clara came from the kitchen with two mugs and went to find Merle.

She peered through the group and found him sitting on the couch, tucked away in the corner, observing everyone and looking nervous and content. She walked over to him and handed him a mug. HIs eyes lit up like a Christmas tree as he inhaled the sweet scent. Clara took a seat on the bench of her piano.

"Hey beautiful," he said as he locked his eyes with hers. She blushed at his words and smiled.

"Hey yourself. What's going through that thick skull of yours?" she asked as he let the delicious liquid slide down his throat. He cleared his throat and shrugged.

"Just thinkin' about how t' handle the aftermath of all this."

"I wouldn't worry about it. We've been through storms like this before."

"Not with a group full of people."

"Look at you getting all sensitive and whatnot. Just drink your cider and leave the figuring out for after the storm stops," she told him. He shook his head and took another sip.

From across the room, Martin saw Clara sitting on her bench and hollered softly.

"You playin' something, Clara?"

She froze and the whole room spun their heads to her. Shawn's smile made her laugh while Daisy slapped Martin's arm.

"Leave her be," she heard her say to her husband. Clara appreciated her sister's slap toward her husband, but she knew he meant well. She hadn't had it in her to play for about two and a half years. She feared she would be rusty and she did not want to fail herself, let alone every person in the group.

"Its only music, you guys," Clara said toward the group. Michonne was the first to speak up.

"Haven't heard music in almost two years. Gotta admit. I'd love to hear some."

Silence filled the room and Clara sighed and turned to Merle.

"It's been three f' me," he said sadly. She stared at him in slight disbelief and nodded.

"Okay. Okay. Alright," she mumbled out loud as she took a gulp of her cider to clear her throat. She listened to everyone settle down facing her and saw Shawn, Sophia, and Carl pile up next to Merle, as if to get the best seats in the house. It made her smile and to be honest, it made life seem normal again.

She chuckled at her audience, who sat patiently. Turning to her keys, she cracked her knuckles and flapped her wrists. She scratched her head and turned her head to everyone.

"Any requests?" she asked. The quiet mumbling made her feel better.

Well at least they want to hear something.

After what seemed like forever of chatting and mumbling about what songs they would love to hear, they were silenced by the subtle keys being played by Clara.

She didnt sing. No. She let her fingers do that. They all sat and watched her dance on the keys. Like fairies dancing on the water, she tapped gently and played softly for awhile.

She turned her head to see everyone stare at her play in awe. Everyone seemed to hold on to each other in comfort and it warmed her whole body. Then she saw the kids. Shawn, who knew what she sounded like, sat in content relief. Carl, the boys tense body was eased. And Sophia, the young lady looked on in wonder. Her eyes darted back to Lori, who rested her hand on her belly while Rick held her and rubbed her belly in an embrace. The lovers were loved. The friends were loved. The families were loved.

Turning back to her song, her eyes met with her husbands and it her body went from warm to hot. His gaze was strong and wanting. She swallowed hard and winked at him, making him give her a grin on the corner of his mouth as she turned her focus back to her piano.

"I used to sing this to you, Shawn, when you were a baby," she said as her fingers danced. Shawn felt his cheeks redden. Clara turned to everybody. "He would pass out on my shoulder," she laughed. "One time, and come to think of it, the only time, Merle and Daryl babysat him, they called me and I had to tell them the lyrics to sing to him cause he was being such a fuss."

Everyone bursted out in laughter at the thought of the Dixon brothers singing to a baby. Merle looked over to Daryl and both men shook their heads. The laughter ceased when they heard her soft voice quietly beam.

_"Why are there so many songs about rainbows_

_and what's on the other side?_

_Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,_

_and rainbows have nothing to hide."_

_So we've been told and some choose to believe it._

_I know they're wrong, wait and see._

_Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection._

_The lovers, the dreamers and me."_

She turned to see everyone listening. Some with their eyes closed. Some with them wide in excitement. She watched as Beth crawled over through the blankets and pillows and prop her arms on the bench, watching Clara play and sing in such amazement. She took a breath and continued on.

"_Who said that every wish would be heard_

_and answered when wished on the morning star?_

_Somebody thought of that and someone believed it. _

_Look what it's done so far._

_What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing_

_and what do we think we might see?_

_Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection._

_The lovers, the dreamers and me."_

She turned to Merle and whispered in song.

"_All of us under its spell. We know that it's probably magic_."

Her focus was then on the kids. She played and leaned to them.

"_Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?_

_I've heard them calling my name._

_Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors?_

_The voice might be one and the same._

_I've heard it too many times to ignore it._

_It's something that I'm supposed to be._

_Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection._

_The lovers, the dreamers and me."_

She let her fingers finish the song gently as she closed it.

"_The lovers, the dreamers, and me."_

Silence filled the room. Smiles were slowly spread. She looked over to Shawn and then Martin and Daisy and winked at them. When her audience began to clap, she stood and took a small bow, noting how Michonne kept on wiping her eyes. Andrea looked at Clara as if to tell her that she was alright.

Merle wanted to clap.

Merle couldn't do that.

He just looked at his wife and never let her go. He looked at Shawn, who was still so relaxed by his lullaby, and ruffled is hair before wrapping an his arm around him in a small embrace.

"If you guys liked that then you should have heard these guys through the phone," she said as she aimed at Merle and Daryl with the thumb.

"It worked!" said Daryl in defense. Clara turned to him.

"After telling you both to sing it softly! Not like The Rolling Stones. No rhythm, you guys. No rhythm."

"He liked it just fine," defended Merle.

"That's why he was still crying through the phone? They had to put the phone to his ear for me to sing to him."

"She's sayin' it was her singin'," said Daryl. "It was my holding' and bouncin' that knocked his ass out."

"What made you start playing?" asked Carl bluntly. The laughter and chatter settled and Clara stared hard into the boy with wonder. The question had clearly caught her by surprise as everyone waited for an answer.

"Well," she started as she played a key. "Do you know who Liberace is" she asked him. Carl nodded his head and raised his brow at the man's name. "When I was a little girl, I was going through my dad's music and I found what I thought was the cassette of The Best of Elvis Presley," she explained as she strummed another key. She adored the look on his curious face.

"So I went to my grandfather's stereo and I put it in. I was so excited. Too excited to check and see if the actual cassette matched the case. Which, if you knew mine and Daisy's grandfather, he wasnt a very orderly man. In this case, it didn't. What I heard when I blasted the volume was this," she said as she played a little melody. She heard light laughter and nodded at everyone.

"Elvis didn't sound like that," said Carl.

"I know, but this is what was on that cassette. It was the prettiest music I had ever heard in all my life. So, out of curiosity, I let it play. Then I heard it," she whispered.

"What did you hear?" asked Sophia. Clara smiled.

"I heard the most beautiful song in the world," she said smiled broadly. Merle gazed at her and she felt her heart thump. She played the melody with such grace, like she was born to play it. "I became obsessed. I played it over and over and over," she whispered as she reminisced. Daisy watched on with a light smile on her lips and said.

"She drove us crazy."

"Wasn't it worth it though, Daisy?"

"It was worth every rewind."

"Finally, one day, it stopped. Played the damned thing so much that the tape broke. Wore it out," she laughed sadly.

"You couldn't find another?" asked Glenn. T-Dog nodded and spoke up.

"Like on a CD or somethin'?"

"Nowhere. Oh, there were other singers who sang it. But none who sang it the way he did."

"Liberace?" asked Carl. Clara looked at him with a big grin and nodded.

"My grandfather played the piano and I wanted to hear that damned song so bad. I asked him and I begged him. I cried for him to teach me. I needed the song. I needed it so bad. It was like a drug to me," she said breathlessly. Merle felt his heart pound and a large pang of guilt wash over him. Clara played with her one hands expertly as the other ran through her hair.

"Can you sing it?" Sophia asked. Clara expected the question. She didn't expect her nerves to go haywire.

"I haven't done that one in a while," she said nervously. "You sure you want to hear it?"

Everyone nodded and expressed their want. She took a deep breath and a sip from Merle's mug. Another deep breath followed and she looked over at Merle, who only gave a tight nod and a small enough grin so only she could see. She nodded and shook her hands once more.

The melody was soft with notes that chimed in flawlessly. She bit her lip and closed her eyes as her fingers made themselves at home.

"_Smile though your heart is aching._

_Smile even though it's breaking._

_When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by._

_If you smile through your fear and sorrow._

_Smile and maybe tomorrow._

_You'll see the sun come shining through for you_."

She turned to everyone and sang as though she spoke soundly.

"_Light up your face with gladness._

_Hide every trace of sadness._

_Although a tear may be ever so near. _

_That's the time you must keep on trying. _

_Smile, what's the use of crying? _

_You'll find that life is still worthwhile._

_If you just smile."_

Looking at the kids, she smiled and played as she continued.

"_Light up your face with gladness._

_Hide every trace of sadness._

_Although a tear may be ever so near._

_That's the time you must keep on trying._

_Smile, what's the use of crying? _

_You'll find that life is still worthwhile_

_If you just smile."_

She took another deep breath and looked at everyone. Some tried to hide their tears. Some held themselves. Daryl stroked Carol's hair and Rick's hand never left Lori's belly. Glenn and Maggie held each other. In this moment, everyone had each other.

She looked at Merle, who sat up and studied her movements and her face. That's when it hit him that this song is what made her last as long as she did. When he realized she was looking right at him, he saw a tear run down her face as she sang with all her might to the point her voice was breaking, but she held it beautifully.

"_That's the time you must keep on trying._

_Smile, what's the use of crying?_"

She shook her head and took a deep breath.

"_You'll find that life is still worthwhile._

_If you just smile."_

She finished with lovely notes and listened to the silence in the room. She turned slightly and studied their faces. It had clearly hit home. They all smiled in their quietness as the music still lingered in their minds. Biting her lip, she rubbed her arms and tightened her cardigan around her.

"Any requests?" she asked nervously. She looked at Merle, who was now sitting alert in his seat. Without standing, her reached over to her bench and pulled it closer to him. They looked at each other with wonder and nervousness, like they were the only ones in the room. She felt his hand reach up to her face and he then pulled her to him. They closed their eyes and made up for the kiss they missed earlier.

They made up for the kisses they had missed since the day he let her down.

"That's disgusting," said Shawn. They both heard giggles as they kissed and they both, without breaking, reached up and shoved their nephew playfully.


	18. Chapter 18

Author's Note: I've been wanting to write this chapter for awhile now. It had been floating around in my head as to when to write it, and with more and more ideas coming to mind lately, I figured now is a better time than any. Also, I wanted to show a bit of what Clara was like when she was younger and what really brought the original group together. Please let me know what you think! To my readers, and I think I can speak for any writer, your reviews are so appreciated! In more ways than one!

-Kadie

_He couldnt get that girl out of his mind. He even remembered her name, which usually never happened. He never made a point to. All damned day he and Daryl were stuck in the same room as her with that boy Martin. He had shut up after they had introduced themselves to each other. Daryl, on the other hand, couldn't shut his mouth. He heard him make her laugh a few times and even got a few hearty chuckles from Martin. How he envied him. _

_The fact that it was a sweltering Friday didn't help him any. It was too hot to think and the only thing he wanted to think about was her. It frustrated him._

_The sound of Daryl scraping his already worn sneaker against the pavement was irritating Merle to no end. With a huff, the elder Dixon turned around and shoved his brother lightly._

_"Cut that shit out, Darylina! Gonna ruin ya shoes. I ain't got no more t' give ya. Pa'll have a shitfit."_

_"Pa always has a shitfit, Merle."_

_"Talk back to me like that again and I won't stop him this time," he said. Raising his brow, he stopped and shoved his little brother again. "And don't say 'shitfit'."_

_Daryl shook his head and walked with a bit more caution, wiping the sweat that beaded on his forehead. Sniffing, he reached into his pockets and removed what sounded like change to Merle, who although was looking forward, had his ears trained on Daryl._

_"Twenty-five. Forty-five. Sixty. Eighty-five."_

_**Hear it comes,**__ thought Merle._

_"Hey Merle? Got twenty-five cents?" asked the timid and dry voice. Merle knew Daryl's schedule like he knew his own. He would save up whatever change he would find laying around and buy a Coke on the walk home everyday. Like clockwork, Merle reached into his pocket and retrieved a quarter._

_"I get some this time. No more o' this hoggin' bullshit," he said as he flicked the silver coin to his brother. He gave Daryl the same speech almost everyday, but Merle never liked soda. So really, he knew Daryl wasn't hogging anything. It was worth it to see the mischievous look on his face when he took the last sip and the laughter that followed when Merle pretended to be bent. _

_**I'll get ya ass next time, **__he would say. He never did. Well, unless he deserved it. But it was never anything like their old man's._

_The brothers turned on the corner of the street and made their way to the small deli. Roonie's, it was called. Everyday it was the same old lady behind the counter and everyday it was the same sorry smile on her face whenever they entered the store._

_"Hi Mrs. Burman," Daryl said. The older lady smiled and looked over to Merle, who stood tall and picked up a comic book. The look she gave him was a lot stonier then the one Daryl got. Like she knew every little thing he had ever done wrong. Merle shook it off and thumbed through the comic book._

_Between tapping his foot, focusing on the comic, and wondering how long it took for Daryl to buy a Coke, Merle's nerves began to twitch. He didn't like most places. He envied that about his brother. Wasn't afraid to explore. He popped a fingertip between is teeth and began to gnaw and thats when he heard the door to the deli open with the ringing of the overhead bell._

_"I can't believe that jerk gave you both detention all day," said an unfamiliar voice. It was smooth and soft. "I was wondering where you guys were all day."_

_"Yeah," said a different voice. A guy. A husky one. "That's the last time I ruin his day."_

_He recognized the guys voice. Merle gulped hard and awaited._

_"Why did you ruin his day?" asked the smooth voice._

_"I don't know. Cause I'm black? Called me a nigger right to my face, he did."_

_Merle heard the voice gasp in outrage and continue._

_"And you? Why did he throw you in there as well?"_

_That's when Merle Dixon heard her voice again._

_"I don't know. Cause I'm white? Called me a cracker right to my face, he did," she laughed as she imitated Martin._

_"No he did not!"_

_"It would have been awesome if he did though."_

_The three of them walked past Merle and he sighed a quick sigh of relief. Upon closer inspection, he saw Martin, Clara, and a shorter black woman with loose brown curls and big brown eyes. She was dressed in an army green sundress and a thin, light gray coat. Flip flops on her feet. _

_"Daisy? What do you want?" he heard Clara ask. _

_**Guess her name is Daisy, **__he thought._

_"Root beer," Daisy shouted as she went down a different aisle. He heard Martin snicker._

_"That sister of yours loves her some root beer."_

_**Sister? Tha' don't make no damn sense.**_

_"Hey Merle? Merle!" shouted Daryl, breaking Merle from his thoughts. He turned to his brother, who stood at the counter waving him over. "The price went up a nickel. I need a nickel."_

_Merle scoffed and began to make his way over to his brother with his hand in his pocket, searching for a nickel, when he saw her again._

_"Hey Daryl," she said with a smile. The younger Dixon blushed slightly and nodded. The elder felt his stomach flip and envy flow._

_"Hey Clara," he mumbled. She saw him standing there and she counted the money on the counter. After doing the math, she threw down a nickel. "You don't have t' do that," he said._

_"I know, but I'm thirsty too," she laughed as she paid for her ginger ale and Necco Wafers. Opening up the bottle in haste, she took a greedy sip and closed it up again. "It's ridiculous out there."_

_"I know it," said Daryl. "I'm sweating like a pig."_

_"Do pigs sweat?" she asked as Daisy and Martin came up behind her and quickly paid for their bill. Martin chuckled._

_"They do in this heat."_

_Merle put his hands in his pockets and walked over to his brother quietly. Clara looked at the towering figure over Daryl and gave a smug smile._

_"Ahh. Mr. Ignorance," she said. Merle swallowed hard._

_"Piano Man," he said in what he hoped was the manliest voice ever. _

_**With m' luck, I squealed like a giddy schoolgirl.**_

_"What are you guys up too?" she asked. Daryl piped up._

_"We're on our way home. Merle may bring me t' the arcade later," he said matter of factly. She smiled and looked up at Merle, who was pretty sure he stopped breathing._

_"Sounds like fun," she said and looked over to Daisy, who looked a bit confused. "Oh, this is my sister, Daisy. She was the only one who wasn't in detention today."_

**_Makes no damned sense._**

_Merle nodded at Daisy with a tight lip and she looked Merle up and down with the same eyes he was giving her. Taking a deep breath, Clara shrugged and tried to think of something to break the silence._

_"We're seeing a movie later. You guys should come," she suggested. Confusion was all that Merle could scrounge in his head. _

_**The hell she thinkin'? Don't even know us.**_

_Before Merle could say anything, Daryl whipped around and looked at Merle with pleading eyes. Merle stepped on Daryl's shoe before he could say anything. Taking the hint, Daryl sighed and hid his disappointment._

_"Nah," said Merle. "Gotta fix my truck."_

_"Bummer," she said. Merle wanted to believe she was just being nice, but something in his stomach told him she was being sincere. "Maybe next time then?"_

_"Yeah. Maybe," he said quickly. "Come on, Daryl."_

_He shoved Daryl slightly and nodded to Martin and Daisy, biting back a comment that he knew would start trouble. Daryl waved maniacally and they were both out the door in a flash. Clara looked on at the closed door and shook her head. _

_"Those were the two you both were talking about?" asked Daisy. Martin and Clara both nodded. "The little one needs a bath and the big one needs a therapist."_

_"Oh shush now," Clara said as she adjusted her backpack. "As true as that is, they seemed like cool guys. Looks like they need a hug more than anything."_

_"I guess," she sighed. "Where are you guys headed?"_

_"Library," said Martin. "You comin'?" Clara shook her head and popped a Necco in her mouth._

_"I have this paper to do. It'll take like fifteen minutes. Don't want to wait last minute. I'll meet you guys at the theater later," she told them as they all exited Roonie's. They said their goodbyes and made their own way. Daisy and Martin down the street and Clara around the corner. Martin turned around to see if he was in the clear before he spoke._

_"You saw that, right?" he asked Daisy._

_"Saw what, Mart?"_

_"Blind ass women these days. Your sister. You didn't see how she got all blushy when that Merle guy showed up?" he acknowledged. Daisy laughed and shook her head._

_"Did she really? She does always crush after the underdog."_

_"You're saying he's an underdog?" he asked. She shrugged._

_"I don't know. He looks mean. A good front. I've seen him around school. A real jerk, but to himself mostly."_

_"You make no sense."_

_"We Reese's have an excellent judge of character. He's an ass, but he's alright."_

_"Excellent judge of character, huh?" he asked as he intertwined his fingers with hers._

_"Excellent," she said with a smile._

_Meanwhile, a ways around the corner, Merle couldn't keep Daryl's mouth shut about going out to the theater. _

_"I don't git why we can't jus' go, Merle. I ain't never been to a movie," Daryl argued quietly. Merle scoffed._

_"Ya watch movies all the time on T.V. Tha' counts."_

_"No it don't."_

_"It really doesn't, Merle," said Clara. Daryl smiled widely and tapped Merle's shoulder._

_"Aww shut up. Are ya tryin' t' make him more trouble f' me?"_

_They continued on walking when Merle did a double take after uttering those words. He stopped walking and scoffed. His stomach flipped again when she smiled at them._

_"Where the hell ya come from?!" he said as he tried to remember if he heard any footsteps and looked behind him to see how far they walked. Clara threw her bottle in the air and caught it with ease._

_"I came from that way," she pointed. "Same way you just came from. I'm going to my dad's place. It's just down over here. You gentlemen are walking me there."_

_"Ya walkin' just fine by ya'self, Sugar," he spat. She looked over to Daryl and put her elbow out and waited. After a few moments of looking from his brother and back to him, she bent down slightly and whispered._

_"That's what you do when you're escorting a lady somewhere."_

_Daryl stared at her arm with slight confusion and then quickly mimicked her action. Placing his elbow out in the air, she smiled and slipped her arm through his._

_"Why Daryl Dixon!? Such a gent!" she exclaimed as they began walking. Merle stood dumbfounded and listened to hers and Daryls light chatter as they walked off until he jerked his body forward._

_"Hey! Get back 'ere!" he said gruffly. Daryl slowed and turned his head._

_"She's goin' this way anyway, Merle. Calm down."_

_"Yeah, Merle. Calm down," _

_"Bite me! And you mind y' teeth!" he said at Daryl when he caught up with them. Clara turned her head and chomped her teeth with what Merle could have sworn was mischief. It made his blood boil and his heart pound, sending butterflies in his belly. He absent mindedly rubbed his stomach and cursed himself._

_**Cut that' shit out right now, Dixon! Ain't no way in hell. Get rid of 'er while ya can.**_

_"Daryl! Let's go," he shouted. Clara looked down at Daryl and nudged him whilst still in each others hold._

_"How old are you?" she asked him._

_"Eleven."_

_"Eleven? Do you always listen to him?" she asked. Daryl shrugged. Merle saw red._

_"The hell d' ya think you are?!"_

_"I'm the Piano Man! Please don't call me anything else other than that or Clara, cause, you know, it's my name," she said with speed. She stopped herself quickly. "Them and Sugar. I like that one too."_

**_Girls don't usually like it when I call 'me that._**

_"My dad calls me Clarabelle because legally, that's my full name. I think it makes him happy because it reminds him of a dog he had when he was a kid," she continued. "But at isn't nearly as cool as Piano Man!"_

_**Clarabelle.**_

_With a huff and a growl, Merle reached out and grabbed Daryl by the shirt and yoked the both of them back to a halt. He noticed the large building they were standing next to. A bar, he guessed. The name of the place appeared to be Roy's and Clara smiled as she let the large, old, brick building consume her. She let the sunshine soak her up as she gazed through the window for a moment, then looked back at the brothers._

_"I know what ya doin'," he said in a low voice. Almost embarrassed._

_"No you don't."_

_"Yeah I do. And ya better cut it out now before ya regret it."_

_"Why in the world would I regret it?" she aske as she stepped closer to him. Merle tensed._

_"WOULD YA JUST GO?!" he shouted._

_As soon as the words left his lips, he regretted it. Daryl stood slumped at the altercation and knowingly made his way back to his brother and didn't say another word. Merle looked down at Daryl and quickly back up at Clara, who stood with her shoulders slumped, like Daryl's. She had a look of confusion and hurt and it didn't sit well with Merle at all._

_**Get rid of 'er while ya can.**_

_Merle cursed his father as he looked into her eyes. It could be so easy to make friends. It was always so hard to keep them. It was so easy to lose them. He and Daryl had grown used to keeping friendships inside the school only and even that seemed useless. They were always the worthless Dixon's. Nobody gave a damn._

_Which was why this frightened him._

_He knew her for a day. Not even. She was bugging them. She wanted to hang out. She wanted to be near them. She looked so hurt when he had just yelled at her. For no reason, granted. But plenty of reason to him._

_Clara blushed when his words stopped flowing through her head. She looked over to Daryl and smiled weakly. He dropped his eyes and waved. Hoisting her backpack up, she looked back to Merle and bit her lip. _

_"See you around then," she whispered so only he could hear. She turned and started to walk away. Merle sighed and shook his head and watched her walk._

_What happened next remains a blur to everyone's eyes. _

_Walking slowly and singing to herself. She looped her fingers through her straps and tried to be cool. She felt her face flush and she put her hand to her cheek, trying to cool it. She could still feel their eyes on her back as she walked. She didn't risk turning around to prove herself right. She placed one hand on the window of Roy's and traced the cool, smooth glass and felt it become colder and gritty as it traced the brick._

_**What the hell was his problem? **_

_**His mom probably didn't hug him enough. **_

_**It's okay though. Worth a shot. **_

_**Why are all the good looking ones cursed with 'Rebel Syndrome'? **_

**_That's not real fair, Clara. You don't know his situation. Your Spidey Senses aren't always on it. Relax. _**

**_Both of their arms were riddled with scars._**

_Clara didn't notice when her shoelace went undone. She did notice the Jeep coming down the street. It was a Hunter Green and it's headlights we're still on. She heard the tires against the gravel and the faint music that it was playing from inside. She took a step and stumbled as she tried to steady herself, but her fingers got stuck in the straps of her backpack. She felts her foot slip off of the sidewalk and everything went quiet as she began to fall into the street. All she saw was that Jeep that was too close to stop._

_Then all she felt were strong arms around her, hoisting her back on to the sidewalk in a stumbling manner. She screamed when the Jeep honked. She closed her eyes tight when she felt the strange embrace. She covered her face in the neck of her rescuer. Everything was bumpy and uneven as they both stumbled back onto the sidewalk and crashed into what she could only presume was glass. In an instant, she was shoved underneath this person and although he landed right on top of her, he tucked her under as much as he could, letting glass fall on top of him. The loud, sharp shattering deafened her and the only thing she could think of was her rescuer's scent as his fingers went through her short hair._

_**Clean dirt.**_

**_A garage._**

**_That smell that only boys have. _**

_"Damnit," her rescuer said in a familiar voice, but she was too worried to look. She felt him try to get up and move his head around, but she was to scared to get up. "Ya alright? Clara?"_

_**Oh my God.**_

_She felt his large hand grip her shoulder and give her a firm shake._

_"Piano Man! Look at me! Ya alright, girl?"_

_Her eyes snapped open at the name. She was greeted by his neck, for her head was still burrowed into him. She felt is firm torso on top of her. Looking up, her cheeks flushed and she couldn't look away._

_His light blonde hair had a spot of blood that came from when he, she could only presume, bumped into the brick wall. His eyes were blue and alert. Breathing heavy with adrenaline and worry. She heard glass crunch as he shifted his weight. There was a scar on his lip, but it looked like it had been there for years._

_"Merle?" she whispered. He nodded._

_"Ya alright?" he asked as he pulled himself up and got to his feet. _

_Oh, how he didn't want to move._

_He reached his hands down and took hers, hoisting her up. Daryl came running over and took off his shirt, using it to brush the glass off of the both of them with experience. Clara cringed at the thought._

_Her heart thumped as she reached over to Merle and picked a shard of glass from his hair. He grabbed her wrist gently._

_"Can ya talk? Are ya alright?"_

_"You just saved my life?" she whispered. Merle shifted uneasily at the thought of thinking him a hero when usually he was the one doing damage._

_"Appears so," he mumbled. Daryl brushed his shirt against Merle's backside, making Merle jump. He whipped around and grilled is little brother. "I'm fine!" he growled. Daryl squinted his eyes and huffed, waving his shirt out and removing whatever glass was on it._

_"Fine," said Daryl. "If ya get stabbed in the asscheek later, don't come cryin' t' me! You okay, Clara?" he asked calmly. She nodded with a deep breath._

_"I'm okay. I'm," she went off and stopped herself before finishing when she took notice as to where it was she was standing and what window had shattered. "fine. Oh no," she said almost inaudibly. She swallowed hard as her heart thumped so loud she thought they would hear it. Merle watched the color drain from her face and he did another double take at what she was staring at. With a laugh, he shoved her gently._

_"Jus' some glass," he said as he observed. The window was to Roy's. She shook her head in worry._

_"No, no, no," she said as she ran her fingers through her hair in panic. "This isn't happening."_

_"Uhh, yeah it is," he said back as he looked at his confused brother._

_"WHAT IN THE HELL?!" came a booming, gruff voice. "WHAT IN THE BLUE HELL?!"_

_She panicked as the voice grew near from the echoing inside of what Merle correct guess was earlier, a bar. By the looks of the long table and tall stools. There were scattered tables around and the chairs rested on them with the legs up off the ground. There was a piano in the corner and for a quick instant, he imagined Clara at it. _

_Also the smell of stale beer and booze wafted out of where the window used to be._

_He chuckled and grinned at Clara, who made a close step to him. _

_"What?" he asked as the angry footsteps from the inside drew near._

_Then it all happened so fast._

_Clara jumped up and hugged Merle hard, taking in his scent once more. She knew he would hate her after this._

_"Wha' the hell, sugar? Le' me buy ya a soda first," he said as he slightly shoved her. She grabbed is face and kissed his cheek hard._

_"I'm sorry," she said with a cracked voice. Merle cocked his brow._

_"F' what? That?" he said as he pointed to the sharp mess. "That ain't nothin'," he said. She shook her head violently as he rubbed his cheek._

_"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry you guys," she said as she turned and scraped her sneakers against the sidewalk. Watching her run off in the opposite direction, Merle went to shout, but Daryl beat him to it._

_"Hey!"_

_Clara stopped and quickly turned her head to Daryl's voice. She growled to herself and ran back to the younger Dixon, grabbed him, and kissed his cheek._

_"Don't be mad at me later. Try to convince your brother," she said as she held Daryl's shoulders and they watched her run off again until she turned the corner and was gone._

_**The fuck was that? **__They both thought._

_In their gaze at the now empty corner, they didn't realize that the man behind the booming voice was standing right behind them, trying to control him temper, but when he spoke, it was soft, and when the boys realized that he was behind them, they jumped and made a run for it, but was being held in place by his massive grip on the back of Merle's shirt and the still shirtless Daryl's ear._

_"Where ya's off to?" he said, keeping calm. Merle spun his head around and a part of him felt his stomach churn. This guy was big. Not at all fat, but lumbering. His long brown hair rested on his shoulders and his goatee was trimmed nicely. He donned a black tee shirt that showed off his aging muscles and blue jeans. He looked deep into Merle and shook his head and then at Daryl, who had fear in his eyes. Merle saw the same fear behind them whenever their father would come after him._

_"Let'us go!" Merle said with gritted teeth as he tried to wiggle out of the mans grip. "We didn't do nothin'," he growled._

_"Lettuce? Goes good with a burger. I ain't lettin' you go, if that's what you were gettin' at," he laughed, still holding his anger. "Names. I want names and I want them right now!" he demanded. Merle looked at Daryl and gave him a quick nod. _

_Daryl raised his foot up and stomped on the man's foot with all of his might. When the man didn't budge, Daryl saw his life flash before is eyes, but the man spoke with a chuckle._

_"Kid? Look at me. Look at the size of me. I've stepped on cockroaches bigger than you," he said. After a long pause, the man looked down at both boys and shook is head. "I can find this out the easy way or I can find this out the hard way."_

_"I'm terrified," mumbled Merle. He heard the man's hearty chuckle._

_"Ya think I'm kiddin'? You just broke my property! This ain't no joke, Mr. Ignorance!" he said as he would his grip tighter in Merle's shirt._

_**Three times in one day.**_

_"I know just about everyone in this town, son. I will find out. Not to sure if you guys would want that."_

_Merle looked over at Daryl, who looked defeated. He growled and huffed and tried to twist himself away. This time, he felt anger in the mans grip._

_"Man up!"_

_"DIXON! Alright?! Dixon!" he roared. When he looked back at Daryl, his eyes were wide and full of concern as they were glued to the man._

_Once the man heard their last name, he let them go gently and had a look of concern on his face as well, Merle noticed. Daryl rubbed his ear and Merle fixed his shirt._

_"Your father Hank?" he asked quietly. Merle looked down and kicked some of the broken glass. The man nodded and looked around. "Thought so. Only man in town who i dont let in here. Ya's look like him now that I know," he sighed. "Guess it's a good thing I didn't ask around then, huh?"_

_"Don't matter none," Daryl whispered. Merle shoved his shoulder._

_"What's your name, son?" the man asked the younger Dixon. _

_"Daryl, sir."_

_"And you?" he turned to Merle with is hands on is hips. He looked into the mans eyes and and didn't see what he usually saw in anyone's eyes. Compassion._

_"Merle."_

_"How old are you guys?"_

_"He's eleven 'nd I'm sixteen," he answered gruffly. The man scratched his chin and nodded._

_"Good. Old enough. Follow me," he said as he stepped over the broken glass and went back into the bar. Daryl followed suit as Merle stood still. Daryl spun around and motioned for him to follow. Merle stepped over the glass and followed his little brother. Merle looked around and took the place in. _

_It wasn't as trashy as the places his father went to. It was clean and orderly. He saw Daryl's eyes glued on the flashy jukebox in the corner next to the cigarette machine. There were old posters up all around of various rock 'n' roll and country singers. Some jazz and blues. He looked back over to the bar and saw dozens of liquor bottles in front of a large mirror. There was a restroom sign that ad arrows pointing in directions saying Ladies and Gents. He didn't want to admit it, but the place had made him feel good, even if he was only in it for a few minutes. Then his eyes went back to that piano he had seen earlier._

_**The hell she run away for?**_

_His thoughts were interrupted by the man's booming voice and the sounds of sturdy footsteps._

_"Daryl? Here," he said. Daryl turned around and caught the flying piece of cloth that was being thrown at him. He unraveled it to see it was a tee shirt. "You'll swim in it, but it'll do for now," he said. Daryl nodded and put it on quickly. The man went behind the bar and retrieved a broom, dustpan, and a cardboard box . He walked back over to Daryl and handed them to him. "Go on and sweep up the little pieces of that glass. Put them in this here box."_

_"What if I get cut?" he asked. His voice so squeaky, the man bit back a laugh. _

_"I was in Vietnam, Daryl. Don't give me no "What if I get cut?" lip," he said. He saw Daryl's eyes go downcast. "I got Band-Aids. Just be careful," he said. _

_"Hey. What's your name?" asked Daryl. The man put out his hand._

_"I'm Roy Reese," he said as he waited for Daryl's hand. The young Dixon took it and Roy shook it firmly. Daryl piped up some as he went outside and began to sweep. Roy looked over at Merle, whose eyes were glued to him._

_"Whats ya game?" asked Merle. Roy shook his head._

_"No game. You're going to work to fix this here window. Any lip and I go to your father. Understand?" he asked. Merle saw red and snorted, biting his lip, he ran his hand over his face._

_"I did this," he said in defeat and a slight lie. "I was helpin' a girl. She almost got hit by a Jeep. I fell int' ya window. He didn't do nothin'," he said. "Ya go t' my pa and he goes through Daryl t' get at me," he said coldly. Roy looked into the young man before him and nodded firmly._

_"I'm sorry he's like that, son. Truely."_

_"Don't pity us," he demanded. Roy nodded._

_"I want the both of you here after school, everyday, you work until its been paid off. He can hang out and do his homework or somethin'. Understand?" he said as he put his hand out. Merle pressed his lips firmly and glared at Roy's ready hand. Roy sighed. "You know you don't have a choice in this matter, Dixon," he said. Merle brought his eyes up to meet the man's._

_"You threatenin' me?" he snapped in a raspy voice. He watched Roy's eyes go soft._

_"I wish it was. Now shake my hand," he quietly demanded. Merle turned his head and looked out to see Daryl as he tried to sweep up the small shards of glass, his small frame being tackled by the large broom. Merle took a deep breath and placed is hand in Roy's and shook it hard._

_A smile spread across the man's face and he let Merle go. He uttered some words, but Merle wasn't paying much attention. His mind was all over the place. He let his eyes wander back over to that piano again and thought of her. He was brought out of is gaze by Roy, who shoved some work gloves into Merle's hands._

_"Here. So you don't slice yourself open," he said, noting Merle looking at the piano. "You play?"_

_"Not at all," he said as he put the gloves on. _

_"Damn fine instrument."_

_"Real fine."_

_"My girl plays. She's real good. Begged my daddy to teach her and boy did he teach her. Can't keep her off the damn thing."_

_"Yeah?"_

_"That's right. Why don't you go on and help your brother before he hurts himself," he suggested as he looked over to Daryl, who kept cursing at himself everytime the dustpan slipped. Merle looked over and nodded. In their silence, they heard faint footsteps and crunching of glass. _

_"Damnit. I'll guide traffic," muttered Roy as he jumped over to the broken window. Merle walked slowly over._

_"Oh my God," said an all to familiar voice. _

_**No.**_

_"Clarabelle, honey, be careful. We had an incident."_

**_No way._**

_"Dad, what happened?" she said as she came into view, looking shocked and puzzled. _

_"Someone took a tumble into the window, is all," said Roy. Merle watched her make eye contact with Daryl, whose jaw hit the floor. She looked around with concern._

_"Well as long as everyone is alright," she said innocently._

_**No fuckin' way!**_

_Roy knelt down and held the dustpan still for Daryl. She took a small step into the bar and stopped in her tracks when she bumped into Merle._

_She shook._

_**She ought a shake.**_

_But when she looked deep into his eyes, he shook too._

_"Hey," she whispered. "Don't hate me. Please?"_

_**I can't kick her ass. Just look at that face.**_


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: So? How did you all like that? That had been floating around in my head for months. It's good to have it out and in the open for you all to enjoy. I wonder how many of you knew what I was doing when I had Roy call Merle Mr. Ignorance. Haha. Well anyways, I know a lot of you are looking forward to some _..smut.._ I promise you that it isn't far behind. In fact, I have one nearing chapter that is completely devoted to it. With tons of humor, of course. Can't have sex and horror without some laughs along the way. As for this chapter, it's not to Merlecentric. Mainly Lori. To some appall. But I had to.

Please review and let me now what you all think, as always!

Oh, and also, just to ease slight confusion before it may start, I am taking a leap here. I had timely plans for this story, but I have realized, my brain needs time to rest and think. I used to think I would be able to pump out a chapter a week, which **is **what I aim to do, but sometimes my plans just don't agree with me, between work, friends, and family. I am sure you can all agree!

Hugs and High Fives,

Kadie

Lori struggled bringing a hefty load of dirty clothes down the stairs. She grunted and waddled her way into the kitchen where she was greeted by Clara, who sat, sipping at her steaming mug with a book in her hold.

Seeing the humorous sight before her, she bit back a laugh and got to her feet in haste. When she went to take the hamper, Lori grunted and pulled away.

"I've got it," she said as she tried to hoist it up. Clara stood back and raised her brow.

"Stubbornness? Yes, I see that. You really shouldn't be carrying around heavy things."

"It's not too heavy," she said as she set the hamper down on the counter with her hip, taking a deep breath. Clara chuckled and shook her head. "What?"

"Leave the hamper. I'll get Merle to bring it out back," said Clara as she grabbed the handles. Lori tugged back at it.

"No. I want to do it!"

"I worked in a bar pretty much my entire life. You think I never tackled a pregnant lady before?" said Clara as cool as can be. Lori twisted her lips, biting back a laugh. She let go of the hamper and Clara placed it on the ground and shoved it near the door with her feet. She turned around and motioned for her to sit. Lori listened and watched as Clara poured another mug of tea and handed it to her. She accepted it gratefully.

"I just want to pull my weight around here," she said quietly as she sipped. Clara sighed and nodded.

"I know. And you are. In more ways than one. So stop overworking yourself. It isn't healthy for you or the baby."

"Seeing everyone always doing something, it makes me feel like the burden of the group."

"That's nonsense. You cook, you clean, you help the kids with their homework. You do plenty."

"Not as much as you or Carol and Daisy. Lulu and Mags and Beth. Andrea and Michonne are always doing something constructive. I just feel like a mistake."

"Well don't. You're far from a mistake," she said as she rubbed Lori's hand. She watched as the woman put her palm on her bigger than ever belly and rub. She smiled warmly. "You are getting bigger everyday."

"I know it. I wasn't nearly this huge with Carl. People couldn't even tell until late in the pregnancy."

"Really? You're such a skinny thing," said Clara as she brought sat back and brought the mug to her lips, making Lori laugh. "Daisy was like a house. Her belly seemed to grow every time you glanced at her. She was also fond of Daryl's hot wings, Merle's peach preserves, and Davy's sweet potato pie," she said as a thought crossed her face. "Come to think of it, it probably wasn't Shawn making her so big." Lori laughed and the thought of Merle and Daryl in the kitchen.

"Merle and Daryl cooking something without a bullet or an arrow sticking out of it? I don't believe that," she said. Clara smiled.

"Well you should. Daryl won "Best Wings" for a little competition a few years back. You'd never think it, but he was so proud of himself. And Merle? A regular Betty Crocker, he is. Went as far as planting a peach tree in the back. You'll see come summertime," she assured. Lori bit her lip and sighed.

"I hope so," she breathed out. Clara made her steel herself at the words.

"Don't talk like that. I hate it when you guys talk like that."

"Anything can happen, Clara. We've been out there. It could happen a minute from now and it could all be done."

"You think we don't know that?" she asked. "How scary and dangerous it is out there? You've got to think positive. This WILL be over one day. I don't know when, but I promise you. I promise Carl. I promise Sophia and Shawn. And I promise that little pot of gold in there that they will live normally again. Because I'll be damned if that baby has to learn how to shoot a gun before she can say the alphabet," she strained out with a glimmer in her eyes. Lori swallowed hard and wiped her face, nodding quickly.

"I just, I don't know," Lori said. Clara patted her hand.

"I know you don't, silly girl," she said to her with a smile. Lori took a few deep breaths to mellow her nerves and looked up.

"You think it'll be a girl? A baby girl?" she asked. Clara looked back to her and her shoulders went up.

"I suppose I do," she said. She watched as joy filled Lori at the idea of a baby girl to add to the group. But she also saw some fear, as there should be. Fear with a hint of an otherworldly sadness. "Is there something else bothering you?"

"No. Well, yes. But it isn't important."

"Sure it is. What's up?"

"You wouldn't happen to know the date, would you?" she asked hopefully. Clara bit her lip and pushed her chair out. She hopped over to the pantry and opened it, looking at a calander that was hanging on the inside. Lori watched as Clara opened a marker and marked off a few days. She smiled crookedly when Clara came back.

"March fourth. Give or take a couple of days. Important day nearing?" Clara sang. Lori chuckled and nodded sadly.

"It is to me. It's mine and Rick's anniversary on the tenth."

"That's lovely!" she said loudly. "Why only you?" she asked as she sat down. Lori held her breath and sighed loudly.

"Things weren't so great before," she confined. "I hinted at divorce before Rick got shot. Then Shane," she cut herself off. "Oh Shane," she drew out breathlessly, holding back tears. Clara nodded with understanding.

"Want to talk about it?" she asked.

"No. It's like a bad omen."

"Its only a bad omen if you let it become one," said Clara matter of factly. Lori looked at her friend with hard eyes in thought and slowly nodded her head. "Should I make more tea?" she asked. Lori gave a small smile and nodded. Clara got up and set more water on the heat and returned and took hold of her still hot mug.

"If I tell you, you'll think I'm a bad woman."

"Takes a lot to decide if you want an bad heart," Clara said. "Go on."

Lori took in a deep breath and sipped her tea.

"We were having problems. I don't know. I think it all began when he became the sheriff. All the duty and responsibility. I really don't think he thought it was getting to his head, but it was, I know. How couldn't it?" she asked.

"I really wouldn't know, sweetie. Being Merle and Daryl's lives as long as me, I could only give a slightly biased answer," she laughed and nudged her friend. "But from what I see with Rick, he takes everything with such seriousness."

"Everything. I just don't know. After ten years of marriage, I just couldn't handle it. We fought a lot. We both mentioned divorce, but we both always ended up sticking it out for Carl. We couldnt throw it all away. I love him. Shane made me realize that."

"Tell me who this Shane guy is," ordered Clara. Lori smiled sadly and took another deep breath.

"The deputy. He and Rick had been best friends since school. Went and did everything together. He was is best man. He was Carl's godfather. He was my confidant," she trailed. Clara got up quickly and removed the water from the heat and brought the kettle over and sat down again.

"Sorry," she said. "So this _Shane_. Did he sweep you off your feet?" Clara sat back and casually crossed her arms and watched as Lori tensed.

"It was going to happen sooner or later. When Rick got shot, he was in a coma for a long time. Shane took care of us. He spent to much time at the house that pretty much lived there. He always said that he didn't want us alone."

Clara listened closely to her voice. A goddess of sorts, she thought. A siren singing a sad song, almost luring herself down farther and farther. Although she couldn't quite relate, she found herself thankful for not ever heading in the direction that she knew Lori's story was heading to. Not that she ever had, nor wanted the opportunity.

"When all this started, Shane was trying to get us out immediately. We stayed behind for Rick for days. That's until Shane went down to the hospital. Came back and told us Rick was dead and that we needed to leave."

"What made you believe him?"

"The fifty percent chance that the doctors had given him the week before and the fact that Shane said told me that the place was chained and boarded. Said that there were bodies piled high outside," she said quickly as she turned her head in tears. Clara watched and handed her a napkin. Lori took it gratefully and rubbed her belly.

"So Rick was dead," stated Clara. Lori nodded.

"He was. I believed he was. In my heart. Does that make me a bad person?"

"No it does not. Not one bit."

"You believed Merle was alive this whole time?" she asked with a hint of doubt. Clara nodded her head.

"I did, but I knew Merle long before we even started dating. He has always been my best friend before anything. We are synced. But that doesn't make me a better person. You just didn't know Rick like that."

"Maybe you're right."

"So what else happened? Like after you all left?" she asked. Lori bit her lip and looked to her lap.

"We just bonded. We got closer. Father mode kicked in towards Carl. Husband mode kicked in towards me. I knew it was wrong. So wrong. But I needed it. I needed comfort and reassurance. I was so scared."

"Don't feel bad. It wasn't like it was an affair," said Clara as she sipped at her mug. Lori looked up to her with eyes of appreciation.

"It felt like it was when Rick came back. Some of the group went on a run. They came back. It all felt weird. Like something was off. Then Carl saw him," she trailed off. "Then I saw him. He was thin and haggard, but it was him. We both ran to him like lightening. I stopped it all with Shane. All of it. I was angry."

"Cause he lied?"

"Yes."

"Well, not for nothing, but I think anyone would have thought he was dead after a fifty percent chance and seeing the hospital eating itself up."

"I know. I was also angry with myself. Then Shane became obsessed after Rick got settled."

"I can understand that. So I'm taking to it that Rick eventually found out about you and Shane?" Clara said. Lori sighed and nodded. "Where did he go?" she asked in a quiet and soothing tone, not wanting to upset her.

"Its my fault. All of it, really. If i hadn't been such a damned drama queen, none of this would have happened," she said bitterly towards herself. "Shane lured Rick out into a field. He was going to kill him."

"Oh my God," whispered Clara, her eyes on her friend.

"Rick figured it out and jumped into action. It was self defense. Not only for him, but for everyone. I realize that now. It's all my fault," Lori cried and buried her head in her hands. Clara sat up quick and placed a loving hand on her back and rubbed, trying to sooth her.

"Shh. Hey now. It's alright."

"He hates me," she whispered. Clara raised a brow and smiled.

"Trust me. If that man hated you, he would not lay next to you in bed every night. You're just stressed, sweetie. You have the hormones and emotions of yourself and that baby running rapid through your body. You should really try to relax more."

"I just don't know anymore."

"I don't think you're supposed to," Clara said. Lori wiped her eyes and smiled. "So. Your anniversary?"

Lori picked her head up and shook her head.

"No. Rick won't have any of it. I'm sure."

"Well, he will just have to be surprised with it then, now won't he? I'm sure he would be dazzled."

"I don't know, Clara," Lori sighed. Clara stood up and went to the hamper and hoisted it up.

"Well I do. Don't you worry about a thing. This will be fun! We can let everyone in on it, except for the groom, of course," she walked back to the table. "I don't think Rick would fit into any of Merle's things. He would swim in them. You know? In the arm area," she said softly as she let her mind wander. "Those muscles. Merle's got those biceps. A...thick chest...as well."

"Need a napkin?" asked Lori. "You're drooling."

"Huh? Oh!" Clara said with a flushed face. "Well yeah. But I think he and Jarred are the same size. Me and Carol will go and raid his closet and then make the guys clean Rick up. Oh this is exciting!"

"I still don't know."

"Well then don't know. I think this is an awesome idea. Bring something cheery in around here."

"What's an awesome idea?" said Merle. Clara smiled and turned around, facing her husband.

"Hey! Oh, its Rick and Lori's anniversary in a few days," she said brightly. Merle looked down at Lori.

"That so?" he asked. Lori nodded. Merle walked over and lowered his mouth to Clara's ear. "What d' I say now?"

"Say 'congratulations' and tell her how radiant she looks today," she whispered back. She heard him growl.

"Congratulations, Lori. You, ya look radiant t'day," he said. Lori stared hard.

"You can't even say it with a straight face," she said. Merle shrugged.

"Nope," he said and was quickly jabbed in the ribs by Clara.

"Go away, you oaf," Clara said. Merle muttered something as he walked to the other door across the room, but was stopped by Clara again, being handed the hamper. She smiled as he scoffed and grabbed hold of the heavy load. As he made his way back, Clara let her eyes drop to his bottom. "Walk slower, Dixon." she called.

"Lke what ya see there, Sugar?" he said, not turning around.

"I've liked it for twenty years."

"Only _twen'y?" _Merle said in a punctured the, but with a big grin. Clara smiled wide and bit her lip.

"Twenty-two."

"More like it," he said as he left e kitchen.

Lori watched as the couple laughed and Merle made his way out the door. She envied her friend as she replayed the quirky scene that just happened. She remembered how she and Rick had been before things went south. In the quiet, didn't realize that Clara had been looking at her.

"We'll do it tomorrow. They guys will be back from their run by then," Clara assured. Lori nodded.

"It's sweet, but I just don't think it will do anything. We are beyond rekindling like that."

"Lori?"

"Yes?"

"Will you shut up and let me do this?" she asked nicely. Lori bit back a laugh and raised her arms in defeat. "Thank you. Now why don't you go on upstairs and get some rest in. Daisy and Lulu will be over later to help with dinner. We could use the help. I'll come get you, okay?"

Lori sighed and nodded. Clara gave her hand and helped the woman stand and to Lori's surprise, Clara brought her in for a quick hug.

"It'll be fun tomorrow. I promise," she said. With that she turned and left Lori in the kitchen. She stood there for a moment and rubbed her belly and let her mind wander before turning and leaving the room as well.

Hours later just before sunset, Daryl, Rick, Glenn, Martin, Davy, and Michonne came to a stop just at the concealed gate. Daryl hopped from the van while Rick and Martin made way to the locks. Daryl scanned his surroundings, always ready for attack with his fingers ready to release his bow. Blocking the sound of the jingling keys, his gut told him to face down and there, standing before it, was a set of footprints.

He quickly looked up and spun around, eyes peeled for intruders of any kind.

"Guys?" he growled in a whispered hush. Glenn and Michonne hopped from the van just as Rick made his way to him while Davy looked out the window with an angered concern.

"What do we have?" asked Rick. Daryl bent down and placed his palm gently in the footprint. "Footprints?"

"You bet," he replied.

"Walker prints?" asked Glenn. Daryl shook his head and pursed his lips.

"Nah. They're to straight. A walker's would be dragged and set to far apart. This person was strolling and was here not too long ago," he said with a trained eye as he felt the dented earth. He looked up at Rick and locked eyes with him.

"We check the road for weak spots and take double watch duty. One person on top of each house at all times until we are certain there is no threat."

The group all nodded and sighed in agreement. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose and turned to Davy and then to Daryl before looking at Martin, who stood with a furrowed brow.

"I'll be damned if somebody fucks with this," Rick said.

Martin nodded.

"I'll be damned with ya brother," said Davy as he started up the van.

Glenn nodded for everyone to head into the vehicle and slammed the door shut loudly, as though it were the only way to vent his anger and fear. Once the van was inside, he was quick to lock the gate and he checked it over and over before grabbing some debris and climbing the gate, throwing it over to help conceal the entrance to their nirvana.

When he got back to the van, Daryl gave him an assuring nod before taking off towards home.


End file.
